Ex never filed agreement -- what rights do we have?

[lynne331]

Pennsylvania. My husband divorced his ex several years ago and they drew up an agreement on the custody and visitation of their 2 kids. In it, my husband was listed as primary custodian, and they listed their visitation schedule. We have been following this and have even given her more days than originally agreed upon. Now we want to move out of state but she refuses our attempts to work out a schedule, so we requested a copy of the divorce decree and custody agreement, and found that she never filed it with the court. When we asked her for a copy of it, she said she lost it, so basically there is no official agreement in place (nothing in the divorce decree about custody). The kids want to live with us and not her and her live-in boyfriend. What rights do we have to take the children out of state, assuming we notify her we want to do so? Any advice is greatly appreciated.

 

[deefran]

Pennsylvania. My husband divorced his ex several years ago and they drew up an agreement on the custody and visitation of their 2 kids. In it, my husband was listed as primary custodian, and they listed their visitation schedule. We have been following this and have even given her more days than originally agreed upon. Now we want to move out of state but she refuses our attempts to work out a schedule, so we requested a copy of the divorce decree and custody agreement, and found that she never filed it with the court. When we asked her for a copy of it, she said she lost it, so basically there is no official agreement in place (nothing in the divorce decree about custody). The kids want to live with us and not her and her live-in boyfriend. What rights do we have to take the children out of state, assuming we notify her we want to do so? Any advice is greatly appreciated.

You do realize that if she never filed the divorce decree with the courts that she and your "husband" are not legally divorced? Unless there is something left out in your message, that should be your bigger worry at this point..whether or not your marriage is even legal.

 

[lynne331]

Update -- sorry, you're right. I wasn't clear. The divorce was final and is legal. I have the papers to prove it. It's the custody agreement that was never filed with the court. It was just an agreement between the two of them, which seemed rather odd to me. An update to this she said she couldn't find the original agreement they signed several years ago and wants us to sign a new one she had drawn up. There really is nothing in place regarding custody and visitation. Is that legal? Shouldn't the lawyers have included it with the divorce? Do we have to give her visitation if the boys don't want to do with her?

 

[deefran]

Update -- sorry, you're right. I wasn't clear. The divorce was final and is legal. I have the papers to prove it. It's the custody agreement that was never filed with the court. It was just an agreement between the two of them, which seemed rather odd to me. An update to this she said she couldn't find the original agreement they signed several years ago and wants us to sign a new one she had drawn up. There really is nothing in place regarding custody and visitation. Is that legal? Shouldn't the lawyers have included it with the divorce? Do we have to give her visitation if the boys don't want to do with her?

Well, if there is no legal document stating visitation, support, etc...then it's basically a free-for-all...To avoid further problems, have your husband file an amendment with the courts on the custody, visitation and support agreement...if they can't come to an agreement regarding these topics if theyc an't a mediator will be assigned to the case to help them hash it all out.. Best bet is to make it all legal in court.