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  1. #1
    sassy37 is offline Junior Member
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    ex wants to go back to court because I won't meet him half way to pick up our son.

    What is the name of your state? south carolina
    My ex is court ordered to get our son every other weekend, he lives 2 hours away and wants me to meet him half the way... when we were divorced in the visitation he is suppose to provide pickup and drop off at my home... I didn't tell him to move why should I have to meet him half way? Do you think the courts would make me do this?
    Last edited by sassy37; 02-14-2005 at 06:24 PM.
  2. #2
    knight7474 is offline Junior Member
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    Since he created the distance he will most likely be held responsible for the transportation cost. Inform him that you will have children ready for pickup at your home per your court order. If he wants to take you back to court, let him.

    Having said that, unless you just can't afford it or you have unreliable transportation, an hour drive is not that bad.
  3. #3
    footballfan is offline Junior Member
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    My experiance w/ distance between families is 50/50 receiving party providing transportation...But as long as the CO says he is to provide you are not required to meet him half way but the judge might change that...
  4. #4
    LdiJ is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by footballfan
    My experiance w/ distance between families is 50/50 receiving party providing transportation...But as long as the CO says he is to provide you are not required to meet him half way but the judge might change that...
    Not when one of the parents moves away. In that instance the moving parent is frequently made responsible for transportation.
  5. #5
    MinCA is offline Member
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    You are an IDIOT! Do you realize there are parents out there who would drive farther than that to see their child for just an hour? WHEN it is convenient for my hubby's ex-wife, we drive THREE hours, taking a day off from work (the visits are directly supervised by a social worker becuase his ex told some huge lies that the sherrif on the case verified to be lies, but the judge won't listen), to go see his daughter for just one hour, then three hours home! It's been a month since we've seen her. AND we are in court three hours away (she was a resident of our county before CPS out there got involved) almost weekly trying to get more time.

    An hour each way to get your son is no freaking big deal, and if you won't do it, then maybe you shouldn't be seeing your son. If you really wanted to see him, you'd drive that distance, would borrow money for gas, whatever. But I guess he's not worth $10 to you. We drive three times as long as you do to see her for ONE HOUR. The time it takes you to pick up your son is all we get to see her, and never more than once a week. When you are driving that distance, tell yourself that somewhere is a father (my hubby) who only gets to see his child for as long as that drive is taking you, and he has to drive three times the distance to do it, and begs to get to do it because he will do anything to see his daughter. Be grateful you get to see yor son and stop complaining about that hour.
  6. #6
    LdiJ is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by MinCA
    You are an IDIOT! Do you realize there are parents out there who would drive farther than that to see their child for just an hour? WHEN it is convenient for my hubby's ex-wife, we drive THREE hours, taking a day off from work (the visits are directly supervised by a social worker becuase his ex told some huge lies that the sherrif on the case verified to be lies, but the judge won't listen), to go see his daughter for just one hour, then three hours home! It's been a month since we've seen her. AND we are in court three hours away (she was a resident of our county before CPS out there got involved) almost weekly trying to get more time.

    An hour each way to get your son is no freaking big deal, and if you won't do it, then maybe you shouldn't be seeing your son. If you really wanted to see him, you'd drive that distance, would borrow money for gas, whatever. But I guess he's not worth $10 to you. We drive three times as long as you do to see her for ONE HOUR. The time it takes you to pick up your son is all we get to see her, and never more than once a week. When you are driving that distance, tell yourself that somewhere is a father (my hubby) who only gets to see his child for as long as that drive is taking you, and he has to drive three times the distance to do it, and begs to get to do it because he will do anything to see his daughter. Be grateful you get to see yor son and stop complaining about that hour.
    Did you perhaps not notice that it was the custodial parent asking the question? That the non-custodial parent moved away and now wants the custodial parent to make the drive?
  7. #7
    Chelle0511 is offline Member
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    ~Well I'm here to tell you that it all depends on the judge. We went to court for the exact same thing like, yesterday. Both CP and NCP both moved an hour from the county their divorce was held in. Equal distances in opposite directions and we asked for her(CP) to provide half and we were denied, because it would conflict with the bedtime of a child that is not even in school yet. So, he may and he may not... depends on the judge
  8. #8
    Vanessa Flaca is offline Junior Member
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    Smile

    I am in the same boat, except I am the NCP who drives 2.5 hours each way to pick up and drop off my kid...Every other weekend, I drive 5 hours ROUNDTRIP to pick up and drop off my kiddo, it's well worth it. ****************************since I was the one who moved an hour even further for employment reasons.
    Although, if you have the means, why not, your son will clearly see that you bend over backwards for HIS happiness. An hour could serve as down time for you or even enjoy sight-seeing....all the best!
  9. #9
    flowerbaby is offline Junior Member
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    Smile

    I think that since your divorce decree states that he is responsible for transportation, he needs to pick up and drop off. He can take you back to court to change this if he likes, but he may not win and it would cost money for a lawyer and such. When he compares the cost of the extra gas to come the rest of the distance compared to the cost of a lawyer and court battle, he may decide the fight is not worth it.
    As far as you giving in and meeting him half way, at this point, that is entirely up to you.
  10. #10
    Benjaline is offline Junior Member
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    Is this so even when the moving parent is the mother

    Quote Originally Posted by LdiJ
    Not when one of the parents moves away. In that instance the moving parent is frequently made responsible for transportation.
    We actually live in California and my boyfriend's ex-wife refuses to meet 1/2 way. He has file paperwork and they are going to court, but she was the one who moved the kids away-5 hours away from where they had been living. In our experience, it seems the courts are biased and rule only against fathers who move away and not mothers. Are we just paranoid or is there some truth to the matter. We think she should be responsible for at least 2/3 of the travel expenses due to her moving away with the kids. Is that asking too much?
  11. #11
    candi4687 is offline Member
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    Not sure but I know somoene else can answer on this one. Is there not something where if the one parent moves (CP) but the other (NCP) is required to meet them half way then there are to modify the child support to help out? Me personally I am the CP and I drive almost 2 hours each way (basically because of traffic..UGHHH) to take our children to their father. Which rarely even shows but I am the one responsible since I moved.
  12. #12
    stealth2 is offline Senior Member
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    Start a new thread, candi, instead of hijacking this one.
  13. #13
    aragornjunkie is offline Junior Member
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    Question NCP moving 3 hours away

    My ex-husband has custody of our 8 year old daughter. We've been apart now for 2 years. We both live in Phoenix, Arizona about 20 minutes away from each other. I am now engaged and we are seriously considering moving about 3 hours way, still in the same state.

    I am very concerned how this will affect my daughter. Right now we see her every other weekend, most holidays and every other week in the summer. Her dad and I get along very well and I am free to see her whenever I like. My immediate family also lives in Phoenix, parents, 3 brothers, 2 who are married and have young children.

    We intend to make the 6 hr round trip every other weekend and would like her to stay the whole summer if her dad agrees. I've been searching the web for advice on how this kind of move affects children and I have found both good and bad. I think the older she gets the more she won't want to have to leave her home for a whole weekend or summer and not be able to see her friends. How it will affect her emotionally really worries me. Will she feel like I am abandoning her, that I'm choosing my fiance over her? Moving is not my idea, it's been my fiancee's dream since I've known him to move to a small town in the pines, out of the traffic and heat.

    Right now we live in an apartment and are able to purchase a home. The prices of homes between Phoenix and ShowLow are extremely different. We could never get the size of house we are looking at in Phoenix.

    I'm extremely torn. We don't want anything to change, but moving that far away will of course make changes. I won't be able to run over there if she forgets something at my house, any school activities I won't be able to attend, if she joins a sports team I won't be able to be there and she might not be able to come to our house if she has to be somewhere every weekend. Right now those things aren't a factor, I think she would love to have her own room in a great house with a huge yard.

    Any advice from parents who are in this situation would be helpful.

    Sorry so long, first time ever writing in a forum like this.

    Thanks for listening.
  14. #14
    stealth2 is offline Senior Member
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    aragornjunkie - you may want to repost this in your own thread - it gets confusing when threads are hijacked with other questions.
  15. #15
    candi4687 is offline Member
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    I was not hijacking anything. I was just advising her from what I have heard and asking anyone else to explain (if they knew about this) to the thread owner if they actually could modify the child support IF she was made responsible to meet half way for visitation.

    Sorry was NOT hijacking anything. just trying to help. BTW GOOD LUCK

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