LostWithoutHER said:
Yes. . .. I also understand that the courts will not appoint an attorney unless it is a 'criminal' case.. and this is 'civil'
I understand that I need an attorney.. ..but did not know that attorney's would represent someone 'pro bono'. .. I have not a clue how to find these types of concil.
I am not giving my child away. .. I am feeling helpless. I don't know where to turn... in this case, I have been evaluated.. . .but not a single other soul has. I have not had the option to choose which doctor is to do the evaluating, I was told who I had to see. I have to go back again, before the judge will hear any further info. I have asked for a trial, but the judge denies every request that I make. I don't understand how he can do this.
I have not a clue what affadavits are. .. and I am not sure how to get these people's words in writing. I have asked the school to provide me with something, and they refuse. .stating that an attorney has to request that information and they would be happy to assist. As far as the subpoenas, the judge had to sign them in order for those people to appear. .. and he did so. If it was not the time or place, it doesn't make sense as to why he would have even signed them . .. .making the people attend court for no reason.
I now can understand where the judge may have frustration of me not knowing the system or procedures, but.. . he still has no right or place to be biased. I have asked for the father, and his wife, and my child to undergo evaluations, and counseling.. ..and the judge denies. I don't get it. I have been pushed into the corner. . .and need to find my way out, and get on top of the situation. I have custody of two daughters. . of my three. They have a different father than my oldest daughter, that we are involved in the custody battle. If I am able to maintain custody of my two younger daughters. .. why isn't the judge seeing this? Did I mention. ..the judge just so happens to attend the same church as me and my children do. He has seen us in the community. .. and knows through observation what kind of mother I am. What am I missing? I just don't get it!
Look online or in the phone book in your area/county for Pro Bono attorneys. Basically Pro Bono means at no cost. Attorney's typically spend x amount of hours representing people who cannot afford an attorney (in basic terms, a type of internship, if you will)
The fact that you have custody of 2 daughters is in your favor, courts do not like to split siblings.
An affidavit can be submitted...sometimes called "Declarations". You can find the forms at your local court house. It's basically a letter of their opinions and observations, signed by them and submitted declaring under penalty of perjury it is the truth.
Subpoena can be difficult for some, some find it easy. If you check your states Family Law Code online, and go to the court, you can find the forms for subpoena- You do not have to be an attorney to subpoena someone or information/documents...but as you've discovered, it's difficult to know what to do and when- when you are not an attorney.
If the judge ordered the evaluation- they likely selected an evaluator from a list of court appointed evaluators. Why they only had you evaluated is beyond me...what I typically see is that both parents and children (& sometimes significant others) are evaluated. What was the reason your X gave for requesting the evaluation? If the X said you were mentally unstable or abusive...and you did not allege any of that about him, that could be one reason.
What you can do NOW is get copies of your children's report cards, file then on your case. Get letters signed by your neighbors, family, friends and file them in the court file as well...so the judge can see and read what people who interract with you think of you as a mother. The judge will absolutely review any piece of paper within the court file.
The fact that the judge sees you in church is not supposed to impact his ability to follow the legal procedures involved in a custody case. He has parameters he must follow, just as you do.
Has the evaluation been completed? If so, what did the report say (If you got a copy of it) If it hasn't been completed and you are a fit parent as you say, relax a little bit. Evaluation is a frustrating thing...you are put on the defensive...many times it upsets people (In a way, it is the evaluator's job to 'upset' you- to see how you handle stress and frustration, and to see if you are logical and sane in your communications and actions).
I'm not sure I am going to get any answers here. I am in desperate need of advice . .. ..not knowing how I should handle the situation. I can always explain more. .but am not sure in what areas I need to elaborate. Any advice is greatly appreciated!