Facebook and Passwords

[PomPomMom]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? GA

I share joint legal and physical custody of my 15 year old daughter with my ex husband. I am listed as the custodial parent. Visitation is 50/50.

My daughter has a Facebook page. Her father has always monitored her online activity and insisted on having her passwords. I consider this an invasion of her privacy but have never said anything. However, recently I discovered that my ex has logged onto her FB page and viewed MY profile. So I changed her password and have instructed my daughter to not give it to her father. I don't want him seeing my page.

My ex is all upset, saying that he has a right to monitor his kids facebook page, blah blah blah. Does he legally have a right to the password?

 

[Proserpina]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? GA

I share joint legal and physical custody of my 15 year old daughter with my ex husband. I am listed as the custodial parent. Visitation is 50/50.

My daughter has a Facebook page. Her father has always monitored her online activity and insisted on having her passwords. I consider this an invasion of her privacy but have never said anything. However, recently I discovered that my ex has logged onto her FB page and viewed MY profile. So I changed her password and have instructed my daughter to not give it to her father. I don't want him seeing my page.

My ex is all upset, saying that he has a right to monitor his kids facebook page, blah blah blah. Does he legally have a right to the password?

Would you rather that Dad simply disallowed computer/internet use during his parenting time?

I can see it going that far.

Why don't you make YOUR profile not searchable/viewable when kiddo is with you? Problem solved!

 

[PomPomMom]

Would you rather that Dad simply disallowed computer/internet use during his parenting time?

I can see it going that far.

Why don't you make YOUR profile not searchable/viewable when kiddo is with you? Problem solved!

Well, he already pretty much does that. She's not allowed to get online without permisson, and even then, he keeps the computer in the dining room. She has NO privacy to chat with friends or her boyfriend. It's absurd.

And changing my own settings wont work, because if he has the PW, then he can log in any time, no matter whose house she's at, and see it. I don't want him to see it, ever.

 

[Mom_of_Two]

I believe you can block your daughter from being able to see your FB page...then the ex won't be able to see it. It is not a "right" to have a FB page, so I don't see you legally being able to do anything about dad's supervision over it. Sometimes, I think we give our teenagers too much privacy, and I am not convinced dad is being unreasonable.

 

[Proserpina]

Well, he already pretty much does that. She's not allowed to get online without permisson, and even then, he keeps the computer in the dining room. She has NO privacy to chat with friends or her boyfriend. It's absurd.

Dad has every right to monitor and actually control what your daughter does online.

She has no legal expectation of privacy like that, and absolutely no legal "right" to chat with her friends or boyfriend.

In all honesty...he's actually being a decent parent in monitoring her online activity.

And changing my own settings wont work, because if he has the PW, then he can log in any time, no matter whose house she's at, and see it. I don't want him to see it, ever.

But YOU have changed her password - indicating that YOU have access to her account.

Why shouldn't Dad?

 

[haiku]

Its his parental right to be as restrictive as he desires in his home.

Also I think you might want to get over his being able to see your page when your daughters around. I mean really what sort of super secret stuff are you posting that you don't want him to see?

Seems kind of silly to be secretive about a facebook page with other adults.

 

[PomPomMom]

I've learned over the years that he and i have very different parenting styles and will always disagree about it. What I came here for was to find out if LEGALLY he can do anything about me refusing to allow him access to our daughters fb page. Cause that's what he's crying now. That I'm impeding his right to parent or some crap like that.

 

[Proserpina]

I've learned over the years that he and i have very different parenting styles and will always disagree about it. What I came here for was to find out if LEGALLY he can do anything about me refusing to allow him access to our daughters fb page. Cause that's what he's crying now. That I'm impeding his right to parent or some crap like that.

Again, why should YOU have access and he shouldn't?

 

[PomPomMom]

I believe you can block your daughter from being able to see your FB page...then the ex won't be able to see it. It is not a "right" to have a FB page, so I don't see you legally being able to do anything about dad's supervision over it. Sometimes, I think we give our teenagers too much privacy, and I am not convinced dad is being unreasonable.

If I block my daughter, then she can't post on my wall and vice versa. I don't want to do that. When I found out that he had viewed my profile, I deleted both him and his wife from her friends list. I dont want him to have access to it, period. He sent her another friend request the other day, and I told her to deny it. He has already set her up a new FB page so she can use it while at his house, but he's still saying he should be able to monitor BOTH pages. I think that's just ridiculous! He can monitor the one she uses at his house. IMO.

 

[Ohiogal]

Legally he has as much right to view his daughter's page as you do. You have JOINT LEGAL custody. The fact that you are interfering and trying to behave like this is showing your immaturity and if dad wants to make a stink of it, you can find yourself in a bit of trouble.

 

[PomPomMom]

Again, why should YOU have access and he shouldn't?

Because I'm the custodial parent and I trust that she is not doing anything wrong. She and I are very close and I would know if she was up to something. He should trust my parenting but he doesn't.

 

[Ohiogal]

If I block my daughter, then she can't post on my wall and vice versa. I don't want to do that. When I found out that he had viewed my profile, I deleted both him and his wife from her friends list. I dont want him to have access to it, period. He sent her another friend request the other day, and I told her to deny it. He has already set her up a new FB page so she can use it while at his house, but he's still saying he should be able to monitor BOTH pages. I think that's just ridiculous! He can monitor the one she uses at his house. IMO.

What gives you the right to delete him from HIS daughter's page. You state that he doesn't give her privacy and yet you are controlling EVERYTHING about her page from her password to her friend's list. Pot meet kettle -- you are worse than dad.

 

[Ohiogal]

Because I'm the custodial parent and I trust that she is not doing anything wrong. She and I are very close and I would know if she was up to something. He should trust my parenting but he doesn't.

NO you aren't. You stated in your first post:

I share joint legal and physical custody of my 15 year old daughter with my ex husband.

He is on even ground with you. Trust your parenting? WHy? You don't trust his. Keep it up and dad can attempt to become custodial parent with him having legal and physical and you having nothing. And you trust that your 15 year old is doing NOTHING wrong? Really?

 

[Proserpina]

Because I'm the custodial parent and I trust that she is not doing anything wrong. She and I are very close and I would know if she was up to something. He should trust my parenting but he doesn't.

...and you should trust HIS parenting.

Honestly - you're coming across as a complete hypocrite.

(Btw - no, you're not going to automatically know when she's up to something. If you really believe that's true, you're in for a VERY rude awakening)

 

[PomPomMom]

I dont mean to come across as a hypocrite. And our parenting plan states that we both share joint legal and physical, but for state purposes (or something like that) I am named Cusodial. It's been years since i looked at the paperwork. But I AM the custodial parent. It says so.

That's what I'm wanting to find out- how far should i let this go before I bow down. I don't want to cause WWIII nor do i want to jeopardize my custody. But I also want to be able to be on my daughters FB friends list without my ex or his skank wife looking at my stuff. I've seen his wifes page and all she's said about me. She's nuts!