Father's chances of getting week to week custody in Missouri

[lukehardy]

I have joint physical and legal custody of my son. Visitation is set up to where I get him every Wed. and every-other weekend. I've never been late or not shown up when it was my turn to have him. I've never been late paying child support. I'm drug and alchol free and have never been in any-kind of trouble. My son is now 2 and I would love to have him a week at a time. (and then she could have him a week) My new wife has her BS degree in child development from Southeast Missouri State University and has been working with preschoolers 40 hours a week for 8 years now. There's no way my x could prove us unfit in any way. I've been at the same job for 15 years, I'm a union floorlayer in St. Louis. My x just had twins with the man she was living with from before the time our divorce was final. My new wife and I both come from good christian homes where the families are still all intact. This is my new wives first marriage and I'm the only one in my family that's ever been divorced. My x has been on felony probation for several counts of forgeryfor writting checks she had stolen from x boyfriends. She's had a dwi. I don't know if any of this matters but I hope I've given someone enough info. about my family and my x to give me some advice. Do I have a chance at winning if I try to modify our decree to where I have my son a week at a time?

 

[Ohiogal]

I have joint physical and legal custody of my son. Visitation is set up to where I get him every Wed. and every-other weekend. I've never been late or not shown up when it was my turn to have him. I've never been late paying child support. I'm drug and alchol free and have never been in any-kind of trouble. My son is now 2 and I would love to have him a week at a time. (and then she could have him a week)

Okay. You would love to him a week at a time and you already have joint legal and physical custody. So you are looking for a change in time.

My new wife has her BS degree in child development from Southeast Missouri State University and has been working with preschoolers 40 hours a week for 8 years now. There's no way my x could prove us unfit in any way. I've been at the same job for 15 years, I'm a union floorlayer in St. Louis. My x just had twins with the man she was living with from before the time our divorce was final. My new wife and I both come from good christian homes where the families are still all intact. This is my new wives first marriage and I'm the only one in my family that's ever been divorced. My x has been on felony probation for several counts of forgeryfor writting checks she had stolen from x boyfriends. She's had a dwi.

Quite frankly that is all irrelevant. Especially the part about living in "good christian homes" and you being the only one in your family that has ever been divorced. When was your ex on felony probation and have a DWI? Before or after the current visitation schedule was set? If before then it is completely irrelevant. If since IT COULD have a very MINOR effect unless the child was in the car when she got a DWI and then the question becomes why did you not do something THEN?
The more important questions are how far apart do the two of you live? When did the two of you get these residences? Could week on/week off work when the child starts school -- if not then don't consider it. And by school assume that the child will be in mom's school district as that is his primary residence now.


I don't know if any of this matters but I hope I've given someone enough info. about my family and my x to give me some advice. Do I have a chance at winning if I try to modify our decree to where I have my son a week at a time?[/QUOTE]

 

[CJane]

Your best bet is to get a consult with a local family law attorney who is very familiar with the judges in your area and how they tend to rule. Some MO judges are all for 50/50 ... though they tend toward a split that allows the child time with both parents every week... and some will not order it no matter what.

What are the chances that mom will agree to the change? What changes are you hoping to make to CS? Visitation and CS are separate issues, but if mom thinks hers will be lowered, she's more likely to fight the change. The questions OG posted are very important. While you CAN make 50/50 work with a 30 mile difference in location, it's a pain in the azz.

Also, with 50/50, you need to consider that it will effectively keep you - and your ex - 'trapped' in the locations you're in RIGHT NOW. It's very difficult to relocate when you share custody. I know that might seem like a random bit of information to worry about right now, but it's worth considering.

Finally, you need to NOT focus on the 'good Christian family' line. You need to NOT try to make your new wife look like a better human being or more qualified mother than your ex wife. You need to NOT play the 'baby out of wedlock' card against your ex-wife. I can tell you, after a LOT of experience in MO family courts that if you do, it will work against you. HUGE.

Edited to add one more question:

Where is the child NOW during the day (home w/mom or at daycare)? If you were successful, where would the child be during the day on your weeks?