Getting sole custody, and lawyer referral bay area CA

[CJane]

Similar to Zig's, my ex has had no contact our daughter in years - since she was 15ish. She just turned 21. I consider myself very lucky that she doesn't have "Daddy" issues, but it still saddens me. Her young man came to me recently to talk about their future - and as happy as I am about it all (I love him to bits), I am saddened for both my daughter and my ex. She will not have her Dad at that important moment, and he will not know what he's missed.

Ah well.... probably bugs me more than her. Or him. LOL

What is it about 15 year old girls and Dads deciding they're on their own?

 

[stealth2]

What is it about 15 year old girls and Dads deciding they're on their own?

Wish I knew. Though I can understand the hurt it causes when a parent ignores a bio's stuff in favor of the step living with him/her...

 

[BL]

While I helped raise my GF's son since infancy till about 17 yrs. old He ask if he could call me Dad. His father is imprisoned 25 to life for murder . He'll never see the outside. I said if ya want. Yrs later I was threatened with death by the boy. Issues lots , anyways I guess I'm not Dad anymore , he takes his infant son and sees his bio Dad .

Just saying I stepped in when a father figure wasn't around.

I've also had my X calling x BFs Dad to my own children. Furious when Dad cares.

 

[TSchaefer3]

I was told I am supposed to post this here rather than start a new thread, sorry about that I wasn't aware of that rule


What is the law in regards to moving out of state with your child when there is no court order or custody agreement? My ex has not seen our child nor paid support for 16 months now. I did speak to him in May, where he had asked to come see our daughter for her birthday. I hesitantly agreed because I was worried that him popping in again after a year, and likely taking a long leave of absence afterwards, would be emotionally detrimental to her. He never showed up and I have not heard from him since, luckily I did not tell her he was planning to come. My husband and I have been wanting to move out of California for a while now, and decided that we should move forward with that plan. I had a consultation with a local family law attorney as I wanted to file for full custody beforehand and she advised to just go ahead and move because it does not sound like he has any interest in the child, or will bother to file anything at all. She said if we do file there would be a temporary order prohibiting us from leaving until the case was settled one way or another. Does this sound correct? I want to make sure I'm making the right move here. I did notify him two months ago of our intent to relocate, he did not respond. I know he did see the email because he later asked about her birthday, he just chose not to answer. I also asked that he sign a statement giving his permission for us to relocate, again he ignored that message.

Does it sound like I'm doing this in the right manner?

 

[LdiJ]

I was told I am supposed to post this here rather than start a new thread, sorry about that I wasn't aware of that rule


What is the law in regards to moving out of state with your child when there is no court order or custody agreement? My ex has not seen our child nor paid support for 16 months now. I did speak to him in May, where he had asked to come see our daughter for her birthday. I hesitantly agreed because I was worried that him popping in again after a year, and likely taking a long leave of absence afterwards, would be emotionally detrimental to her. He never showed up and I have not heard from him since, luckily I did not tell her he was planning to come. My husband and I have been wanting to move out of California for a while now, and decided that we should move forward with that plan. I had a consultation with a local family law attorney as I wanted to file for full custody beforehand and she advised to just go ahead and move because it does not sound like he has any interest in the child, or will bother to file anything at all. She said if we do file there would be a temporary order prohibiting us from leaving until the case was settled one way or another. Does this sound correct? I want to make sure I'm making the right move here. I did notify him two months ago of our intent to relocate, he did not respond. I know he did see the email because he later asked about her birthday, he just chose not to answer. I also asked that he sign a statement giving his permission for us to relocate, again he ignored that message.

Does it sound like I'm doing this in the right manner?

There is really nothing legally stopping you from going ahead and moving. You notified dad, and he did not file anything to attempt to stop you from moving. You really don't need his "permission".

 

[Silverplum]

What you're doing "wrong" is not listening to your attorney. If you don't trust him/her, go for a consultation with another. Many offer free initial consultations.

(Your attorney is correct, btw.)

 

[Ohiogal]

I was told I am supposed to post this here rather than start a new thread, sorry about that I wasn't aware of that rule


What is the law in regards to moving out of state with your child when there is no court order or custody agreement? My ex has not seen our child nor paid support for 16 months now. I did speak to him in May, where he had asked to come see our daughter for her birthday. I hesitantly agreed because I was worried that him popping in again after a year, and likely taking a long leave of absence afterwards, would be emotionally detrimental to her. He never showed up and I have not heard from him since, luckily I did not tell her he was planning to come. My husband and I have been wanting to move out of California for a while now, and decided that we should move forward with that plan. I had a consultation with a local family law attorney as I wanted to file for full custody beforehand and she advised to just go ahead and move because it does not sound like he has any interest in the child, or will bother to file anything at all. She said if we do file there would be a temporary order prohibiting us from leaving until the case was settled one way or another. Does this sound correct? I want to make sure I'm making the right move here. I did notify him two months ago of our intent to relocate, he did not respond. I know he did see the email because he later asked about her birthday, he just chose not to answer. I also asked that he sign a statement giving his permission for us to relocate, again he ignored that message.

Does it sound like I'm doing this in the right manner?

You need to make sure dad has your contact information if and when you move. And seriously, he has had contact with calling you and such.

 

[TSchaefer3]

There is really nothing legally stopping you from going ahead and moving. You notified dad, and he did not file anything to attempt to stop you from moving. You really don't need his "permission".

Now that we have moved do I need to contact him to provide him with our new address or do I do so only if he asks? I am a bit uneasy about giving him the address but want to be sure I'm going about everything in the legal and correct manner.

 

[TSchaefer3]

You need to make sure dad has your contact information if and when you move. And seriously, he has had contact with calling you and such.

Yes, he has had contact but it has been very minimal. He has contacted me two or three times, and never asked to speak with her, and has not actually seen her in almost 1 1/2 years. As per CA family code 7822(b) The failure to provide identification, failure to provide support, or failure to communicate is presumptive evidence of the intent to abandon. If the parent or parents have made only made TOKEN EFFORTS to support or communicate with the child, the court may declare the child abandoned by the parent or parents.

I'd say his efforts are definitely "token"

 

[Ohiogal]

Now that we have moved do I need to contact him to provide him with our new address or do I do so only if he asks? I am a bit uneasy about giving him the address but want to be sure I'm going about everything in the legal and correct manner.

Yes you should give him the address.

 

[stealth2]

I do want to thank OP for keeping it all to one thread - it is most helpful!