Giving things

[Zigner]

And that's legal?? Don't the kids know that things are missing? Don't they complain? The things are theirs, not yours (or hers).

Then don't send it. Stop trying to control other people when you don't have that right.

 

[notaped]

I want my kids to remember me throughout the week. If she's able to just throw these things away or just send them back to me, then she's just erasing me from their minds from visit to visit.

 

[CJane]

I want my kids to remember me throughout the week. If she's able to just throw these things away or just send them back to me, then she's just erasing me from their minds from visit to visit.

Do your kids suffer from some sort of mental or emotional disability that prevents them from remembering people w/out a tangible object to associate with that person? Or that my child is perhaps playing his XBox and thinking "I love my StepDad because he bought me this XBox, and it helps me remember him", as opposed to "Man, I love playing Skylanders!"?

And yes, sometimes my kids and stepkids complain about what I've given away or whatever. But it's not actually my job to care whether or not the kids are happy every second of every day. It's my job to keep peace in my household, as much as is possible with 7 kids. Sometimes, that means getting rid of things that cause conflict.

 

[notaped]

If you cannot understand why snacks and treats for only some of the children in the household is a problem, then you are not a real parent. Any real parent knows exactly why that's a problem.

If my grandchildren refused to share snacks and treats with ALL the children in the household, they would lose those snacks and treats immediately. I don't care who gave them to them.

Don't question my being a real parent. I don't have much money as it is. She works city job and has good pay. I'm barely making over minimum wage. The things I buy are for MY kids. I don't buy them to support other people's kids. If I was rich and well to do, then maybe, but again, I'm not.

 

[Zigner]

Don't question my being a real parent. I don't have much money as it is. She works city job and has good pay. I'm barely making over minimum wage. The things I buy are for MY kids. I don't buy them to support other people's kids. If I was rich and well to do, then maybe, but again, I'm not.

Your control-freak nature shines brightly.

 

[LdiJ]

Don't question my being a real parent. I don't have much money as it is. She works city job and has good pay. I'm barely making over minimum wage. The things I buy are for MY kids. I don't buy them to support other people's kids. If I was rich and well to do, then maybe, but again, I'm not.

You honestly don't get it...I don't know why I even bothered. Keep on breaking the rules of good parenting and see how far that gets you.

 

[notaped]

Do your kids suffer from some sort of mental or emotional disability that prevents them from remembering people w/out a tangible object to associate with that person? Or that my child is perhaps playing his XBox and thinking "I love my StepDad because he bought me this XBox, and it helps me remember him", as opposed to "Man, I love playing Skylanders!"?

And yes, sometimes my kids and stepkids complain about what I've given away or whatever. But it's not actually my job to care whether or not the kids are happy every second of every day. It's my job to keep peace in my household, as much as is possible with 7 kids. Sometimes, that means getting rid of things that cause conflict.

I didn't have children with her just so she could leave and find another man to be the father to our children. I don't need some wannabe hero playing "daddy" to my kids.

By the way, I don't appreciate the snarky remarks. Every minute they don't see me is another passed opportunity for me to get to know them and them to get to know me.

 

[single317dad]

I didn't have children with her just so she could leave and find another man to be the father to our children. I don't need some wannabe hero playing "daddy" to my kids.

By the way, I don't appreciate the snarky remarks. Every minute they don't see me is another passed opportunity for me to get to know them and them to get to know me.

I repeat my advice from an earlier thread of yours: Seek help, right away. You should be in treatment, and not just for the "impure thoughts".

 

[notaped]

I repeat my advice from an earlier thread of yours: Seek help, right away. You should be in treatment, and not just for the "impure thoughts".

What are you implying? I'm not crazy, if that's what you're thinking.

 

[CJane]

I didn't have children with her just so she could leave and find another man to be the father to our children. I don't need some wannabe hero playing "daddy" to my kids.

Well, she probably didn't have children with you so that she could find out later that you have compulsive thoughts of pedophilia and incest. So I'd say neither of your expectations were really met.

By the way, I don't appreciate the snarky remarks. Every minute they don't see me is another passed opportunity for me to get to know them and them to get to know me.

I'm not being snarky. I'm being honest. Even if you weren't ordered to only have very limited supervised visits with your children, you still wouldn't spend "every minute" with them. If you were still MARRIED, you wouldn't spend "every minute" with them. And you're not going to get the opportunity for MORE time with them until you can show the judge that you're not a danger to your children.

 

[single317dad]

What are you implying? I'm not crazy, if that's what you're thinking.

You're not in treatment against your doctor's recommendation; that's a fact and that's why I can say with confidence that you should be in treatment.

In addition, your words and tone here give me (admittedly not a doctor) the impression of other psychological issues that you should seek professional assistance with.

 

[Proserpina]

One day, Spinny, lilmansmom & stepmom4ever started living together as a family.

They had a child.

Later on, that child became a practitioner of dubious acts with the underaged.

OP is that child.

Any questions?

 

[LdiJ]

One day, Spinny, lilmansmom & stepmom4ever started living together as a family.

They had a child.

Later on, that child became a practitioner of dubious acts with the underaged.

OP is that child.

Any questions?

You had better hope that my laptop has no permanent damage from the wine I just spit all over it.

 

[LdiJ]

What are you implying? I'm not crazy, if that's what you're thinking.

Look, all snark aside. You are being scarily unrealistic about your situation. You have a major situation that could cause you to never have more than supervised contact with your children. Now, you are in complete denial about a parenting issue that any rational person can understand. If you do not get some help from a therapist who can help you come to terms with all of this you could end up imploding. You do not have to be crazy to need therapy. You just need to understand that your life has gotten you in over your head, and you need someone to help you come to terms with that, and to figure out what kind of changes you need to make to bring everything back under control.

If you bring up the situation with the treats and snacks in court, and the judge hears mom's side of the story, its not going to be pretty for you.

 

[notaped]

One day, Spinny, lilmansmom & stepmom4ever started living together as a family.

They had a child.

Later on, that child became a practitioner of dubious acts with the underaged.

OP is that child.

Any questions?

I don't get it. My parents have nothing to do with this. Besides that, they have stayed together through thick and thin. I have no stepparent. See, this is what I'm talking about. Families aren't supposed to separate.

Even the Bible says: What therefore God hath joined together, let no man put asunder. so that they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate. So that they are no more twain, but one flesh.

The law and the courts should not be getting in the ways of families.