Help with Child visitation and possible overnight stay.

[LdiJ]

Thank you Tinker I will defintely request EOW. It doesn't hurt one bit. That is what I am truly hoping for if it does work out is to at least get 1 day of overnight. My child is two years old and has not once slept over my house. It's a horrible feeling, but I have to be strong and hope for the best.


Now i have a swimming pool in the backyard (inground) with no fence. Would that prevent me from having my child spend the night? Would I have to get a fence or would a pool alarm which we have throughout the house (all windows and doors)?

Seriously dad, that is as dangerous to the safety of your child as it gets. Get that pool fenced, with a good lock on the gate, before you do anything else.

 

[BL]

Don't most areas mandate a fence these days?

(I completely agree with you, btw)

An approved mandated Fence spesifications with a gate that child locks safetly and preferably has a loud alarm.

Check you local codes.

 

[stealth2]

It's not only unsafe for your child, but for others in your neighborhood. I'd be surprised if your homeowners insurance isn't higher as a result - it's known as an "attractive nuisance". If, God forbid, a child were to drown in that pool, you would be liable in a huge way. As you should be.

I have to say that this is one area where I was over-protective. If there was a pool? I pretty well insisted on a locked fence. If there wasn't one? Kid wasn't going to that home unless I was going to be there. Period. To me, it's worse than an unsecured gun.

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

As an FYI, he may very well have a fenced in yard that prevents outside folks from coming in but no fence to prevent someone from going in directly from the house.

I would suggest swimming classes for said child.

 

[stealth2]

As an FYI, he may very well have a fenced in yard that prevents outside folks from coming in but no fence to prevent someone from going in directly from the house.

I would suggest swimming classes for said child.

And many municipalities require a fence around the pool, proper. Which is likely to reduce his insurance premiums, as well as limit his liability in case of a tragedy.

When we had a pool, we had a (locked) fence around the entire property, as well as a (locked) fence around the pool proper. HOWEVER one side was a detached garage, and we did have a neighborhood kid climb over said garage to get to the pool. The insurance company said that we could be held liable in the event of a tragedy unless we filed a trespassing report with the cops any and every time it happened.

Ignoring the possibilities is just foolish.

 

[Proserpina]

It's not only unsafe for your child, but for others in your neighborhood. I'd be surprised if your homeowners insurance isn't higher as a result - it's known as an "attractive nuisance". If, God forbid, a child were to drown in that pool, you would be liable in a huge way. As you should be.

I have to say that this is one area where I was over-protective. If there was a pool? I pretty well insisted on a locked fence. If there wasn't one? Kid wasn't going to that home unless I was going to be there. Period. To me, it's worse than an unsecured gun.

Without goldfishing (ahem), it's happened to someone I know in PA. Little girl didn't die, but her brain went without oxygen for too long and there have been extremely dangerous complications.

 

[not2cleverRed]

As an FYI, he may very well have a fenced in yard that prevents outside folks from coming in but no fence to prevent someone from going in directly from the house.

I would suggest swimming classes for said child.

The child is 2. Most children under the age of 5 aren't developmentally ready for swimming lessons. Some of them do pick it up, but that's rare.

Also, a 2 year old is unlikely to be able to stand in an in the ground pool - even if the kid can swim, that could be a problem.

If Dad really loves his child, he will take care of this ASAP.

 

[Bubbas]

Great information everybody. I truly appreciate the responses. I will defintely call a few places up today to try and get everything set for Friday.

 

[BL]

FYI -

The loving 2-year-old twin sisters were inseparable in life — and after a heartbreaking tragedy, remain forever linked in death.

Funeral services were being held Saturday for Jocelyn and Shaylyn Spurlock, the twin Aurora, Ind., toddlers who died Tuesday after wandering into a neighbor's pool.

"They're going to be buried in the one coffin with angels on it because they always liked angels,” the grandfather Jim Conley

 

[PlaysWithSharks]

My parents had a pool, and although they had a fence, they had like 5 doors that led out to the pool. They did not watch my twins when they were little. They were very mad, and thought it was because we didn't trust them...but we didn't trust the twin terrors that could divide and conquer, not them. It was a battle I fought for several years and stood my ground.

Then we bought a house with a pool. Fenced, with locks and alarms on both doors leading out to it, and the alarm was always activated. Further, we had a fence around the pool inside the fence.

I used to live in Vegas, and there was a drowning like every other day. It only takes a few seconds and you live with the consequences forever. I was totally on your side for more visitation until I got to the fence thing. If I were mom, I would freak the heck out over the lack of fence and fight you tooth and nail. Invest in a fence.

 

[aardvarc]

I'm in Florida. Know what happens here in mid-April every year? The annual orders of child-sized body bags start arriving at fire stations all over the state in anticipation of summer - as well as to the Fish and Wildlife Commission, which is the primary emergency response agency for boating incidents in and on state waters. Even with the vast amount of swimming, boating, and all other manner of water activities that take place in our lakes, rivers, and oceans, drownings in backyard pools is the #1 use of those body bags every year. Put up the fence, whether mom is screaming bloody murder for it or not.

 

[Ohiogal]

I'm in Florida. Know what happens here in mid-April every year? The annual orders of child-sized body bags start arriving at fire stations all over the state in anticipation of summer - as well as to the Fish and Wildlife Commission, which is the primary emergency response agency for boating incidents in and on state waters. Even with the vast amount of swimming, boating, and all other manner of water activities that take place in our lakes, rivers, and oceans, drownings in backyard pools is the #1 use of those body bags every year. Put up the fence, whether mom is screaming bloody murder for it or not.

I just felt bile and vomit in my throat. Dangit. I love Florida but I hate THIS!

 

[LdiJ]

I just felt bile and vomit in my throat. Dangit. I love Florida but I hate THIS!

Ditto, ditto, ditto.

When my father was two years old he was hauled out of a neighbor's pond, unresponsive. He was brought back...yes...in the 1930's. This strikes home hard for me.

 

[Proserpina]

I just felt bile and vomit in my throat. Dangit. I love Florida but I hate THIS!

Horrific, isn't it?

 

[aardvarc]

Horrific, isn't it?

It's not even MAY, and just in my 12 county area we've lost 4 children already to pools (plus two officers lost in the line of duty in the last 8 weeks, just to top off the bile). And those are just the ones that **I** am aware of...and I'm not even working in dispatch right now!

The only 2 times I've ever heard officers (both supervisors, actually) fly the F word over the radio both involved drownings with dead or dying children where the officer was desperately trying to do CPR and yelling for EMS/ambulance to get there "right the F NOW".

Sad, because it's SO preventable.