How does a parent win custody from a 3rd party that has temporary custody?

[Mommy_of_4]

I am in Ohio.
My daughter had been living with her father for 2 1/2 years. He abused her & not even Childrens services would do anything. I found out that my daughter had been living with his mother (her grandma) for 7 months before anyone told me the truth. She called and asked if I would sign court documents so she could have custody & that he would also. I said I would rather the grandma have her than her father. I talked to a few friends & decided that something wasnt right. I looked online to find out that he was incarcerated with 5 felonys & learned that he was heavy on drugs. There was finally the change in circumstance that I needed to regain custody. The court awarded the grandmother temporary custody, even though she tried to deceive me to keep my daughter, & since it was the middle of the school year, they decided to leave her where she was, just until we went back to court to get this resolved. It has now been almost a year, and I am forced to wait 7 more weeks until we go back. I have a stable home, income, and a vehicle. I also have custody of my other children. I can definitely provide their basic needs, plus a mothers love and affection. What chances do I have to regain custody of my child? I dont do drugs or drink. I just completed an intense advanced medical program where I received 3 different certifications. I am now able to get a job in a hospital or with a fire department and make up to $18 an hour. I am more than willing and want to have my daughter. If she stays with her grandma, Im sure she will grow up with emotional problems. I just want her to be home with her family, me (her mother) and her brothers and sister. The court said that the grandma has the burden to prove that I am unfit, then I also have to prove to the court that it is in my daughters best interest to be with me. I have had nothing but bad luck with this court in the past. I am so afraid that they will let the grandma keep her since she has had her for over a year. What do I do? Im scared & nervous.

 

[LdiJ]

I am in Ohio.
My daughter had been living with her father for 2 1/2 years. He abused her & not even Childrens services would do anything. I found out that my daughter had been living with his mother (her grandma) for 7 months before anyone told me the truth. She called and asked if I would sign court documents so she could have custody & that he would also. I said I would rather the grandma have her than her father. I talked to a few friends & decided that something wasnt right. I looked online to find out that he was incarcerated with 5 felonys & learned that he was heavy on drugs. There was finally the change in circumstance that I needed to regain custody. The court awarded the grandmother temporary custody, even though she tried to deceive me to keep my daughter, & since it was the middle of the school year, they decided to leave her where she was, just until we went back to court to get this resolved. It has now been almost a year, and I am forced to wait 7 more weeks until we go back. I have a stable home, income, and a vehicle. I also have custody of my other children. I can definitely provide their basic needs, plus a mothers love and affection. What chances do I have to regain custody of my child? I dont do drugs or drink. I just completed an intense advanced medical program where I received 3 different certifications. I am now able to get a job in a hospital or with a fire department and make up to $18 an hour. I am more than willing and want to have my daughter. If she stays with her grandma, Im sure she will grow up with emotional problems. I just want her to be home with her family, me (her mother) and her brothers and sister. The court said that the grandma has the burden to prove that I am unfit, then I also have to prove to the court that it is in my daughters best interest to be with me. I have had nothing but bad luck with this court in the past. I am so afraid that they will let the grandma keep her since she has had her for over a year. What do I do? Im scared & nervous.

I think that you really need an attorney if at all possible.

You do have a constitutional right to the care and custody of your child, and you did file for a change in custody as soon as you found out that your ex was incarcerated and that the child was living with grandma. Therefore, this honestly should go in your favor, assuming that there are not any facts that are missing.

However, its a bit disheartening that the court awarded temporary custody to grandma, and that is why I think that you need an attorney if you can find any way to retain one.

 

[Mommy_of_4]

I do have an attorney. He said the court could award grandma custody on the basis that she has had my daughter for over a year, even though I didnt know about it for 7 months and the rest of the time it has been pending through the court. Her attorney asked for a continuance because he wasnt prepared to try and prove me unfit. Im very fit and they have nothing bad to say that would make me seem unfit. Their only argument is that I dont have much income. I do inhome daycare and receive child support, so my income is around $1300 a month non-taxed. I am still considered 'poverty level', but I know that it is more than enough to take care of my children. I do receive rental, food, and medical assistance, but I was told that the court cannot use that against me. I am working on my state & national registry tests, once completed, I will be able to make a lot more. The grandma is trying to argue that since I lost custody almost 4 years ago, that I shouldnt be allowed to regain it, even though I have made a better life for myself and my children. My daughter just turned 6, so she is too young to talk to the magistrate.

 

[sometwo]

how did you not know your child was living with someone else for 7 months?

How old is the child and how often do you see your child?

 

[PQN]

The grandma is trying to argue that since I lost custody almost 4 years ago, that I shouldnt be allowed to regain it, even though I have made a better life for myself and my children. My daughter just turned 6, so she is too young to talk to the magistrate.

Why did you lose custody 4 years ago? Was CPS involved or was it a custody battle between you and dad?

 

[Mommy_of_4]

I live an hour away. When I would go pick up my daughter for my scheduled visitation, she was always at her dads house. My daughter was 5 & told me that she slept at grandmas house. I asked her dad about it & he said that she stays the night when her grandma doesnt work the next day so she wouldnt have to go to daycare. I didnt think anything of it at the time, until she called me to ask for custody. I know that her father will NOT regain custody after his 5 felonys and drug abuse.

 

[Mommy_of_4]

I didnt have a steady job and moved around a lot and couldnt afford an atty.

 

[LdiJ]

I do have an attorney. He said the court could award grandma custody on the basis that she has had my daughter for over a year, even though I didnt know about it for 7 months and the rest of the time it has been pending through the court. Her attorney asked for a continuance because he wasnt prepared to try and prove me unfit. Im very fit and they have nothing bad to say that would make me seem unfit. Their only argument is that I dont have much income. I do inhome daycare and receive child support, so my income is around $1300 a month non-taxed. I am still considered 'poverty level', but I know that it is more than enough to take care of my children. I do receive rental, food, and medical assistance, but I was told that the court cannot use that against me. I am working on my state & national registry tests, once completed, I will be able to make a lot more. The grandma is trying to argue that since I lost custody almost 4 years ago, that I shouldnt be allowed to regain it, even though I have made a better life for myself and my children. My daughter just turned 6, so she is too young to talk to the magistrate.

Since you have an attorney, your attorney is the best person to advise you. However, I would certainly argue that grandma would not have had the child for so long had grandma and dad not hidden from you the fact that the child was living with grandma.

 

[mistoffolees]

Since you have an attorney, your attorney is the best person to advise you. However, I would certainly argue that grandma would not have had the child for so long had grandma and dad not hidden from you the fact that the child was living with grandma.

From the parent's perspective that makes sense. From the child's perspective, it doesn't matter WHY the child was with grandma. The judge has to make a call as to what is better for the child. In this case, he decided that NOT making a change was best for the child, at least on a temporary basis.

I'm certainly not going to second-guess a judge when I don't have the facts in front of me.

 

[Mommy_of_4]

I completely understand why the judge decided to leave my daughter with her grandma, temporarily. They didnt want to move her in with me and then go back to court a few months later and find a reason why she shouldnt be with me. They didnt want my daughter hopping from place to place. I know that they will find me fit, Im just nervous about the length of time that she has lived with her grandma. I dont think they should use that against me, since I didnt know about it & then I had to wait on the court.