How to fight, Department of Social Services

[geruches]

Just because she's disabled or mentally challenged doesn't mean she can't work. That's what my mother n law does for a living. Gets those challenged /disabled jobs.

OP your clueless about disabilities and what your daughter has. You need to educate yourself first so that you can help her. Research on the internet , find other parents to talk to , research at the library.

I can't believe all these years you've been this clueless.

Oh I know darn well she can work. Didn't mean to come across like she can't. Just that unemployment rate is just so high where she lives. It's just going to make it that much harder for her to get a job. So far she's worked at KFC and McDonalds.

Maybe it's because she acted normal to me. She kept her room clean, did her homework, she helped around the house, got good grades. She didn't curse at me or bad talk. She's kind and shows respect to others. All this time they told me she was doing good in school. They gave me no reason to believe different.

This IQ test that she took, I didn't know anything about it until yesterday.

 

[sometwo]

Oh I know darn well she can work. Didn't mean to come across like she can't. Just that unemployment rate is just so high where she lives. It's just going to make it that much harder for her to get a job. So far she's worked at KFC and McDonalds.

Maybe it's because she acted normal to me. She kept her room clean, did her homework, she helped around the house, got good grades. She didn't curse at me or bad talk. She's kind and shows respect to others. All this time they told me she was doing good in school. They gave me no reason to believe different.

This IQ test that she took, I didn't know anything about it until yesterday.

Did she not have IEP's?

If she did , did you participate in those meetings?

 

[geruches]

Did she not have IEP's?

If she did , did you participate in those meetings?

Yes, she had IEP meetings. They would talk about what they was going to do.
That's why I thought she was doing go. I was going by what they were saying.

 

[WittyUserName]

OP your clueless about disabilities and what your daughter has. You need to educate yourself first so that you can help her. Research on the internet , find other parents to talk to , research at the library.

This is a start, but I honestly think that your daughter needs help that you are not going to be able to provide. If you think she's getting railroaded, you could try to get in touch with a legal advocacy organization for those with disabilities:

- Maryland Disability Law Center

They might also be able to provide referrals to agencies that could help her. But clearly, she needs a level of help that you are unlikely to be able to provide.

 

[Just Blue]

Yes, she had IEP meetings. They would talk about what they was going to do.
That's why I thought she was doing go. I was going by what they were saying.

Sigh...Where are the father/s to these children?

 

[GinAA]

Sigh...Where are the father/s to these children?

Thanks for Asking that, Blue....Really wondering about that myself.

 

[Just Blue]

Thanks for Asking that, Blue....Really wondering about that myself.

I am not the first to ask...OP just never bothered to answer...Like her DD's issues, the question seems to "get lost".

 

[geruches]

No, but based on Granny's description of what she's capable of, she should not be on her own - and certainly should not be having children.

Granny's statement that it is impossible to ask for birth control for her is also false. If she is deemed incapable of making that kind of decision on her own, the court can appoint a legal guardian who can have Norplant inserted.

And, ultimately, it comes down to one thing. Granny is more interested in appearances than in doing what's right for her child or grandchildren. Look at the title of this thread. Instead of acknowledging that her daughter was unfit, she comes out with both barrels blazing away and wanting to fight Social Services. It's unfortunate that her daughter isn't capable of taking care of herself and her children, but it's reality. Grandma can fight reality all she wants, but reality almost always wins in the end.

My daughter and I was at the doctors office when the doctor told me what they did.
I didn't know about other options I could take. Shame on me.

You can say what you will but she was doing good up to this year.

Yea, I had a catchy title. Got your attention didn't it.

 

[geruches]

Sigh...Where are the father/s to these children?

Yea, I wonder that myself. Haven't seen them since she told them she got pregnant.
Social Services is having a hard time locating them since they moved from the area.

 

[LdiJ]

No, but based on Granny's description of what she's capable of, she should not be on her own - and certainly should not be having children.

Granny's statement that it is impossible to ask for birth control for her is also false. If she is deemed incapable of making that kind of decision on her own, the court can appoint a legal guardian who can have Norplant inserted.

And, ultimately, it comes down to one thing. Granny is more interested in appearances than in doing what's right for her child or grandchildren. Look at the title of this thread. Instead of acknowledging that her daughter was unfit, she comes out with both barrels blazing away and wanting to fight Social Services. It's unfortunate that her daughter isn't capable of taking care of herself and her children, but it's reality. Grandma can fight reality all she wants, but reality almost always wins in the end.

Misto, part of the point that I am making is that with an IQ of between 70-76 (which is where she tested, further posters dropped it to the low end) there is no guarantee that a judge would appoint a guardian or agree that a guardian was needed...or even agree that she was actually mentally retarded.

Now, she may very possibly be an unfit mother. The condition of the apartment as it was described was extremely bad as were some of the other things. So she may be a neglectful parent legally.

However, an IQ of between 70-76 does not automatically define her as retarded. 70 is the very upper end of mildly mentally retarded.

That is why I went and looked up the scale, because from the way that some of the posters reacted, it would have seemed as if they considered 70 to be moderately mentally retarded or worse. Since I couldn't remember what the scale was, I wanted to check it.

 

[Zigner]

Maybe it's because she acted normal to me. She kept her room clean, did her homework, she helped around the house, got good grades. She didn't curse at me or bad talk. She's kind and shows respect to others. All this time they told me she was doing good in school. They gave me no reason to believe different.

I gotta ask...why didn't your daughter graduate from HS? She got good grades, did her schoolwork, was doing good in school...

 

[geruches]

This is a start, but I honestly think that your daughter needs help that you are not going to be able to provide. If you think she's getting railroaded, you could try to get in touch with a legal advocacy organization for those with disabilities:

- Maryland Disability Law Center

They might also be able to provide referrals to agencies that could help her. But clearly, she needs a level of help that you are unlikely to be able to provide.

Thanks for the info. I figure someone would come though.

She didn't have problems until this year, so something happen that I'm not aware of yet. There's something that my daughter isn't telling me. I'm sure.

Your right, I can only do so much. Something are out of my control.

 

[mistoffolees]

However, an IQ of between 70-76 does not automatically define her as retarded. 70 is the very upper end of mildly mentally retarded.

I never said it did.

But you've got someone with a very low IQ who (by her own mother's description) can't take care of herself, much less anyone else. And who apparently can't keep her pants on.

Just from what Grandma said, combined with the Social Services report, the girl shouldn't be left to fend for herself. I suspect that the courts would willingly acknowledge that.

 

[geruches]

I gotta ask...why didn't your daughter graduate from HS? She got good grades, did her schoolwork, was doing good in school...

She did graduate, she walked across the stage. But the school always told me she would only get a certificate saying she completed school. Which she did finish the 12th grade. I was told this because she was in a program called. Learning for Life.

 

[Zigner]

She did graduate, she walked across the stage. But the school always told me she would only get a certificate saying she completed school. Which she did finish the 12th grade. I was told this because she was in a program called. Learning for Life.

If she graduated, she has a diploma...how did you not follow up on that?

I'm sorry - I'm gonna step back on this...something just seems...off...to me.