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  1. #1
    wantsittostop is offline Junior Member
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    how old does a child have to be to have a say in visitation?

    What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? CA

    I do not live in CA but my papers are currently still in that state. I am the CP and my childs father has visitation. My child has expressed on serveral occasions how uncomfortable she is going to visit her father. For reasons like seeing them suck on each others tongues and making jokes of it, or them making it very clear that they are going to shower together. Either way, my child hates going there and has told the father repeatedly and he does not care. He will force her to and take her away hyper ventilating and crying. She is 10 years old and if she were able to make the decision she would never see him again. Can anyone tell me what the legal age is that the child has a say in if they want to discontinue visitation with the NCP? He has been paying child support, but i would rather him stop paying than to continue having her deal with the trauma he puts her through.
    Any advice? Thanks in advance.
  2. #2
    CourtClerk is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by wantsittostop View Post
    can anyone tell me what the legal age is that the child has a say in if they want to discontinue visitation with the ncp?
    18*********
  3. #3
    wantsittostop is offline Junior Member
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    thank you for that answer, but that is one age that i am already aware of. its seems they should have a say at some point before they turn 18?
  4. #4
    CourtClerk is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by wantsittostop View Post
    its seems they should have a say at some point before they turn 18?
    It seems to you because you would like to faciliate your daughter's juvenile want to discontinue a relationship with her father. However, CA does not have a provision in the family code that says that after a certain age, a child can choose to discontinue visitation. So, teach your daughter how to properly open up the lines of communication with her father and open a dialouge with him.

    Of course, to that answer, you'll probably say, you have, she's tried and he won't listen.
  5. #5
    Humusluvr is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by wantsittostop View Post
    What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? CA

    I do not live in CA but my papers are currently still in that state. I am the CP and my childs father has visitation. My child has expressed on serveral occasions how uncomfortable she is going to visit her father. For reasons like seeing them suck on each others tongues and making jokes of it, or them making it very clear that they are going to shower together. Either way, my child hates going there and has told the father repeatedly and he does not care. He will force her to and take her away hyper ventilating and crying. She is 10 years old and if she were able to make the decision she would never see him again. Can anyone tell me what the legal age is that the child has a say in if they want to discontinue visitation with the NCP? He has been paying child support, but i would rather him stop paying than to continue having her deal with the trauma he puts her through.
    Any advice? Thanks in advance.
    Children under the age of 18 do not get to decide to stop visitation. You need to explain to your daughter that she doesn't have a choice in whehter or not to follow the court order. Children understand if you describe how the police will come and lead mommy away if she denies daddy his legal rights. So, let her know she should make the best of it. And all children go through the phases your daughter is going through right now.
  6. #6
    wantsittostop is offline Junior Member
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    wow court clerk? do you know me? is there a reason your replies to me are so bitter? im sure you dont really know me or my situation or my daughter or her father. so please, if you do not have pleasant advice, do not bother replying.
    Last edited by wantsittostop; 10-13-2008 at 07:44 PM.
  7. #7
    Isis1 is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by wantsittostop View Post
    wow court clerk? do you know me? is there a reason your replies to me are so bitter? im sure you dont really know me or my situation or my daughter or her father. so please, if you do not have pleasant adice, do not bother replying.
    oh honey, stop already. if dad is really being abusive (according to your state laws as defined by abuse, not "daddy won't let me have a cell phone and talk till 2am on a school night" type of abuse) then call social services.

    the law is the law is the law. you, as a parent, need to follow court orders. the child needs to follow the parent's authority. the child must in effect follow the law the judge has declared.

    edited to add....pleasant advice...LMFAO!!! YOU'RE FUNNY!!
    Last edited by Isis1; 10-13-2008 at 08:23 PM.
  8. #8
    Humusluvr is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by wantsittostop View Post
    wow court clerk? do you know me? is there a reason your replies to me are so bitter? im sure you dont really know me or my situation or my daughter or her father. so please, if you do not have pleasant advice, do not bother replying.
    She gave you a completely accurate response. COMPLETELY
  9. #9
    Ohiogal is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by wantsittostop View Post
    wow court clerk? do you know me? is there a reason your replies to me are so bitter? im sure you dont really know me or my situation or my daughter or her father. so please, if you do not have pleasant advice, do not bother replying.
    She wasn't bitter. She was honest. The law is not pleasant. Deal with it. You are apparently expecting Drphil.com -- please visit there for your sympathy. She can quit seeing dad the same age she can quit having anything to do with you -- 18. Deal.
    Parents should remember 3 things: Love your kids more than you hate your ex; when you have children the relationship with the other parent is until death; your children determine what type of nursing home you end up in.
    Nothing stated by me should be taken as giving you legal advice or forming an attorney/client relationship.

    Attorney-GAL in Ohio.

    I've removed the knife from my back, polished it, and will one day return it -- long after you think I have forgotten.

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