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  1. #1
    Baycon is offline Junior Member
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    I moved...can my ex make me move back?

    My ex and I lived in Kentucky at the time of our custody agreement (It is only a temporary one). We never went back to court for a permanent one, and it has been about 6 months (our son is now 16 months old). The only thing that our agreement states is that I drop our son off at daycare at 6:30am, my ex picks our son up at 10:30am and returns him at 3:00pm, at which point I pick him up and take him home. One night a week our son stays the night with my ex. No one pays child support, but my ex is required to pay 40% of the cost of daycare.
    I recently got married and moved across the state line to Indiana. I still work in Kentucky and our arrangement is still the same. I informed my ex that I was moving, and he said it was fine. Now, after I have already moved, my ex suddenly says he has a problem with it. He is taking me back to court to change our custody agreement. Is there any way that my ex can make me move back to Kentucky (or make it so I can_t take my son to Indiana)? I don_t have any written proof that he agreed to the move.
    Last edited by Baycon; 09-19-2007 at 01:05 PM.
  2. #2
    TinkerBelleLuvr is offline Senior Member
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    Did you get it in writing that your ex was okay with you moving just over the border?
  3. #3
    Baycon is offline Junior Member
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    No, unfortunately I did not get it in writing.
  4. #4
    Ohiogal is offline Senior Member
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    Did you follow the proper COURT procedure for moving such as filing notice of relocation with the court 60 days before the move telling the court your new address and what not? How long have you lived in Indiana? Your ex can force it so that his child is returned to KY -- you would nto necessarily have to move back but your child would have to which means the baby would be living full time with his dad and you could visit.
    Parents should remember 3 things: Love your kids more than you hate your ex; when you have children the relationship with the other parent is until death; your children determine what type of nursing home you end up in.
    Nothing stated by me should be taken as giving you legal advice or forming an attorney/client relationship.

    Attorney-GAL in Ohio.

    I've removed the knife from my back, polished it, and will one day return it -- long after you think I have forgotten.
  5. #5
    moburkes is offline Senior Member
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    Well, yeah, he can. He can't very well pick up the child for the afternoon every day, now can he? You are more than welcome to allow your ex to have custody, and then you can stay with your current husband.
    My new signature:
    Originally Posted by arazi
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  6. #6
    TinkerBelleLuvr is offline Senior Member
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    Are you in a border city? A 'move' across statelines might literally be a couple of miles.
  7. #7
    tuffbrk is offline Senior Member
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    You indicated that his visitation has not changed. That'll help. However, you need to file the appropriate court papers to obtain permission to change the state of residence for your child.
  8. #8
    CJane is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by moburkes View Post
    Well, yeah, he can. He can't very well pick up the child for the afternoon every day, now can he? You are more than welcome to allow your ex to have custody, and then you can stay with your current husband.
    Actually, Mom said that visitation has remained the same. If they live in a border town, it's very likely that she'd still be using the same daycare, etc.

    I'm not going to look up KY statutes re: relocation, but I know that in MO a move out of state, regardless of distance is considered a change in circumstances significant enough to change custody over... but a move that doesn't effect visitation significantly (as long as it's in-state) is not.

    I would think that time since move would play here too. If dad knows she moved 6 months ago (and I don't know how long it's been), and is only filing NOW, it's probably not gonna fly with the courts. Status quo and sitting on your hands and all.
  9. #9
    moburkes is offline Senior Member
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    I took it to mean that the papers hadn't been changed. Maybe I misunderstood.
    My new signature:
    Originally Posted by arazi
    I'll take you on one-to-one in a volcabulary test anywhere, anyplace, anytime.
  10. #10
    Baycon is offline Junior Member
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    I did not move to a "border town." The town I currently live in is about 30 miles from the town I used to live in. I did not know that there were papers to be filed, since it has not affected our arrangement whatsoever. There isnít anything in our temporary order that states either parent canít move. Obviously, I know I canít take my son from his father, and I knew when I moved that I couldnít take away from my exís parenting time. But, since I still work at the same place, and take my son to the same daycare, and had my exís approval (which he has known about me living in Indiana for over a month), I didnít think it was wrong. I am now trying to file the appropriate paperwork, but from the way it sounds, it may be too late.
  11. #11
    Silverplum is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Baycon View Post
    I did not move to a "border town." The town I currently live in is about 30 miles from the town I used to live in. I did not know that there were papers to be filed, since it has not affected our arrangement whatsoever. There isnít anything in our temporary order that states either parent canít move. Obviously, I know I canít take my son from his father, and I knew when I moved that I couldnít take away from my exís parenting time. But, since I still work at the same place, and take my son to the same daycare, and had my exís approval (which he has known about me living in Indiana for over a month), I didnít think it was wrong. I am now trying to file the appropriate paperwork, but from the way it sounds, it may be too late.
    You're not only accountable to your decree, but also to whatever applicable state laws and rules governing divorce with children in general. You know that now.
  12. #12
    LdiJ is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Baycon View Post
    I did not move to a "border town." The town I currently live in is about 30 miles from the town I used to live in. I did not know that there were papers to be filed, since it has not affected our arrangement whatsoever. There isnít anything in our temporary order that states either parent canít move. Obviously, I know I canít take my son from his father, and I knew when I moved that I couldnít take away from my exís parenting time. But, since I still work at the same place, and take my son to the same daycare, and had my exís approval (which he has known about me living in Indiana for over a month), I didnít think it was wrong. I am now trying to file the appropriate paperwork, but from the way it sounds, it may be too late.
    I think that you may end up being ok. There are so many people who live in KY and work in IN, or work in KY and live in IN, that judges in the area are going to be pretty accustomed to that.

    Yes, you may have made a mistake in how you handled the move, but since it has absolutely no effect on dad and dad's visitation, its not all that likely that the judge would change custody.
  13. #13
    Ohiogal is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by LdiJ View Post
    I think that you may end up being ok. There are so many people who live in KY and work in IN, or work in KY and live in IN, that judges in the area are going to be pretty accustomed to that.

    Yes, you may have made a mistake in how you handled the move, but since it has absolutely no effect on dad and dad's visitation, its not all that likely that the judge would change custody.
    Unless the child is due to start school next year and now will be going to school out of state so instead of dad getting time during junior's school week or easily being able to dart over to the school the child would have been attending he now has to make a 60 mile round trip because mom and up and decided to move with her new man. There are many reasons why this was not a good idea.
    Parents should remember 3 things: Love your kids more than you hate your ex; when you have children the relationship with the other parent is until death; your children determine what type of nursing home you end up in.
    Nothing stated by me should be taken as giving you legal advice or forming an attorney/client relationship.

    Attorney-GAL in Ohio.

    I've removed the knife from my back, polished it, and will one day return it -- long after you think I have forgotten.
  14. #14
    CJane is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ohiogal View Post
    Unless the child is due to start school next year and now will be going to school out of state so instead of dad getting time during junior's school week or easily being able to dart over to the school the child would have been attending he now has to make a 60 mile round trip because mom and up and decided to move with her new man. There are many reasons why this was not a good idea.
    I agree it wasn't a good idea... but the temp order that's in place now is going to have to change anyway when the child (now only 16 months old) starts school.

    Dad's visitation is from 1030am-3pm... not gonna work during school anyway.

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