I need help with a paternity question

[rmet4nzkx]

Again, this is nothing more than another assumption on your part. There is no doubt this man can file a petition to establish paternity. Your belief of what is in the child’s best interest is irrelevant, especially since it is based on very limited facts. The court will decide if the quality and conviction of the evidence presented is enough to order the parties to submit to a DNA test.

Alabama code also states:
(Section 26-17-5)
Presumption of Paternity; rebuttal
A presumption of paternity under this section may be rebutted in an appropriate action only by clear and convincing evidence. In the event two or more conflicting presumptions arise, that which is founded upon the weightier considerations of public policy and logic, as evidenced by the facts, shall control.

Amommy - if he follows through with filing in court contact an attorney to assist you. You may also find this link useful:
http://www.uslegalforms.com/lawdigest/paternity-law-digest.php/AL/AL-598P.htm

As I said, I appologized for assuming the bio father knew. I also appologized for assuming that she had given her son's doctors a truthful family medical history and that she, would, for the best interest of her disabled child want to have every available resource for her child, but I was mistaken.

Most likely the judge will decide in the best interest of the child, not the mother's need for secracy, the child and his doctors need to have an accurate medical history to provide him with the best possible care. It would be unethical for me not to stress the need to be honest with the child's physicians.

Snostar, you are angry with me because I disagreed with you based on my professional experience, you are taking it personally and applying that anger to your observations as they suit your agenda. That is understandable. I hope OP comes back and reads the more recent posts and is honest with the child's physicians. I made a mistake assuming and giving her the benefit of the doubt. That doesn't change my advice or the application of the law.

If the bio father takes it to court, The judge will take into consideration the child's best interest which will include an honest medical history, so all the codes you cite to fight it will not rise to a level to perserve her need to keep a secret over her son's right to have the best possible medical care including but not limited to an accurate medical history.

 

[snostar]

Rmet - we replied at the same time. No, I'm not angry with you. Actually, if anything you've helped me become more open-minded. In most cases the "best interest" of the child depends on far too many factors that are not always included by posters. I agree that the biofather's medical history in respect to the child's condition would be a strong consideration for a judge, but the judge will consider ALL of the other aspects of the child's wellbeing and the fact that this child has had a legal father in their life that has taken on the responsibilities and rights to act as this child's parent. I can't possibly predict how a judge will rule if the biofather pursues establishing paternity, and neither can you. So, in effect we have given this poster both sides of the coin, which is to her benefit.


I don't take you personally, so don't flatter yourself.

 

[rmet4nzkx]

(Section 26-17-5)
Presumption of Paternity; rebuttal
A presumption of paternity under this section may be rebutted in an appropriate action only by clear and convincing evidence. In the event two or more conflicting presumptions arise, that which is founded upon the weightier considerations of public policy and logic, as evidenced by the facts, shall control. What that above sentence you underlined means is that the underlined portion below will have the greater weight, the judge will also consider the fact that she hid the child from the bio father and gave false information to the child's doctors.

"Establishing paternity gives a child born outside of marriage the same legal rights as a child born to married parents. Children with legal fathers are entitled to benefits through their fathers that may include Social Security benefits, veteran's benefits and inheritance rights. Children may also benefit by knowing their biological family';s cultural and medical history. Either parent may take action to legally establish paternity. The process may begin at any time, until the child attains the age of majority. In Alabama, the age of majority is 19."

Her actions send up red flags, sorry to say.

 

[snostar]

Her actions send up red flags, sorry to say.

Although I don't agree with the poster's actions in not making the child's physicians aware of the child's genetic background, I happen to KNOW your "red flag" indicator is NOT accurate at times. At times you create fabrications that are not based on any facts provided. BTW, stop making a poor attempt to analyze me it really depletes any credibility you appear to be trying to establish.

 

[rmet4nzkx]

Although I don't agree with the poster's actions in not making the child's physicians aware of the child's genetic background, I happen to KNOW your "red flag" indicator is NOT accurate at times. At times you create fabrications that are not based on any facts provided. BTW, stop making a poor attempt to analyze me it really depletes any credibility you appear to be trying to establish.

You don't agree with the red flags, that does not make them worng. Here you agree, but only after it is pointed out, that makes you angry. Now let's get real, I gave her the benifit of the doubt, that was a mistake, the red flag was still a red flag. Now why is she so secretive? Her husband knows about the "Bio father", but she doesn't tell the child's doctors when it is obvious they need to know the truth and giving them her husband's history instead. Why is she so set against there being a DNA test? I'll give you three guesses and the first 2 don't count!

Please, you need to read the posts with an open mind, not with your personal agenda. I know you say you are getting better at that but, you still have some growth in that area. Maybe you can't do that all the time with what is going on with you right. In many professtion, they avoid in their professional lives the issues currently active in their private lives. So, I might not respond to something too close to home. We have to always, just like "Tootle the Train" "Always keep on the track!" When a child is involved it is always the best welfare of the children. No matter what the situation, my advice would be to give the doctor a truthful medical history for her DISABLED child or any child. There is no other option and that holds the highest weight, in this case it means access to the Bio Father, who ever he is. It is not like she didn't know or had access, or was it? She was intentionally lying. I also know about the child's disability Chari I Malformation, just as I knew basilar fractures in another thread today. That is a part of my work. What was it last weekend that upset you? A poster who moved 12 miles from NC over the border to SC, so she could take advantage of a loophole allowing her to secretly register her custody case and obstruct visitation while claiming her ex was forum shopping, what part of that red flag was wrong, You bought her story when it was full of holes.

Relax, if I make a mistake, I will admit it, just like I did giving OP the benifit of the doubt expecting that she had been truthful to the doctors, that was an asumption and I thought he was responding to genetic counseling, I was wrong, instead, she was the one being deceptive. I need to be more distrustful of people I guess. It still doesn't change the red flag or the advise, those remain constant.

Right now I am working on a case of a middle aged developmentally disabled adult who has no benifits because his mother has lied all these years and sheltered him. She now complains that she can't take care of him anymore and has to tell the truth to get the services or he will end up on the street when she dies. It has taken 2 years to get this man eligible for the assessment and she is trying to sabatoge the interviews. That's where secracey and deception lead, it is never in the best interst of the children to lie about their medical history to their doctors.

BTW I don't have to analyze you, it is very clear.

 

[tigger2two]

I just wanted to add one small yet big thing to this post. I read in the paper one time (some medical thing) about a child that had died. Something had started to happen to this child and he was rushed to the er. The mother didn't know the father and therefore couldn't give any medical info on the father of the child. Well the child died of some apparent but unfounded heart condition.(i don't know the medical terms). About a year later the mother ran into one of her old flings and was telling what had happened. Well low and behold this guy had a history of heart conditions in his family as well as other things that doctors would need to be aware of. So the woman went back to the doctors office with this man and talked. The doctors were almost positive if in fact he was the father that given this information they would have known to monitor this child bc of his families medical history. The doctor told her that if he would have known all the facts (even though this man may not have been the childs father) they would have known what to be on the watch for. Moral to this is....you never know what can or can't happen to your child and having a full medical history is something that NEEDS to be given.

I have a history of cancer in my family on both sides. so what does that mean? It means bc my doctors know this I am tested more often to make sure that if i do develope it , they will catch it early. Secrecy isn't always the best for anyone. But legally you can do what ever you advice you chose to take from any of the other posters!! GOOD LUCK!! and i applaud you for caring for a special needs child. I know its not easy.

 

[BigCat50]

You all are kidding, right? OP, you are correct in your original post. Your husband is the father of the child. The other fellow will NOT get visitation nor will he have to pay CS (unless some idiot judge not knowing the law screws up and you have to appeal) until you and your husband are divorced. THEN all bets are off.

 

[rmet4nzkx]

You all are kidding, right? OP, you are correct in your original post. Your husband is the father of the child. The other fellow will NOT get visitation nor will he have to pay CS (unless some idiot judge not knowing the law screws up and you have to appeal) until you and your husband are divorced. THEN all bets are off.

Big Cat why did you waste the time to post, you didn't even look at the OP or the law, which is very specific and in this case, the child needs information the BIO dad who ever he is, has. If paternity is established, then there may be both C/S and visitation. OP is hiding something and lying to her child's doctors. This can adversley affect her child's treatment and future.

There is something seriously wrong with this picture.

 

[BigCat50]

I understand your medical point, rmet4nzkx. It's a good one. As for the rest, well, I guess we'll just have to dis-agree. All I ask is that you keep in mind the child was not born outside of the marriage, and look into the law a bit more. If you still wish to stand your ground, fair enough.
Oh and I'll ask one more thing. Save the attitude when speaking with me, it's wasted.

 

[snostar]

This has now turned into a debate of "how the judge will rule." Let it go. Amommy, does the biofather know about the child's medical condition? Here is thread that addresses the issue of paternity in Alabama and DNA testing:

https://forum.freeadvice.com/showthread.php?t=15523&highlight=paternity+alabama

EDIT: Here is another thread that addresses DNA testing when a child is born in a marriage and the husband is presumed the father (in Texas, but the "presumed" father applies):

https://forum.freeadvice.com/showthread.php?t=184572&highlight=paternity

IAAL is an attorney.

 

[Shay-Pari'e]

You all are kidding, right? OP, you are correct in your original post. Your husband is the father of the child. The other fellow will NOT get visitation nor will he have to pay CS (unless some idiot judge not knowing the law screws up and you have to appeal) until you and your husband are divorced. THEN all bets are off.

What Fairy Tale book are you looking at? It doesn't matter that she is married. I also don't understand why you all are not letting her know that "BIO"Dad has rights. If He can prove he is the father, he can seek visitation and custody for that matter.

If the mother of a child born out of wedlock is willing to consent to the filing of a legitimation action, the action can be filed . If the mother will not consent to the legitimation, the father needs to consider filing a petition seeking to establish legal paternity in Juvenile or Circuit Court in the county in which the child resides. Once paternity has been established ,he can seek custody, visitation, or anything he wants to file for. Will it be granted? Depends on alot.


What about his rights? Everyone is just jumping in to this thread and not once giving difference to the Bio Dad. What about the child? This is Two Fold....The child has the right to know Bio Dad, not get caught up in parents not making good choices. The child deserves the right to get the best health care possible.

Think about if folks.

 

[snostar]

Amommy, what it is appearing to come down to is whether or not you will make your child's health a priority higher than a paternity suit. At times, while my case has been in court I had to admit things I did not want to, and take action for my child's best interest even when I knew those actions may not benefit me in court. In the end it since it was best for my child it benefited me in court. You have to live with yourself and the consequences of your actions, so consider speaking to your child's physicians concerning the importantance of genetic medical history in your child's treatment. IMO, it is the least you can do.

 

[BigCat50]

Even though my time is too valuable for me to spend this much time typing, and repeating myself, I did want to respond to "Paradise". It does matter that she's married. Now I'm not going to waste more time explaining anything else to you, because you will only argue. Spend some time on your search engine of choice.

To Snostar, I always enjoy your posts. A topic such as this with very old "*******y" laws being applied to newer, lower (or perhaps just different?) levels of morality always invites debate. That's a good thing, yes? We'll all be smarter in the end.


Finally, good luck to the OP. Keep us posted. Back to work for me. sigh

 

[Shay-Pari'e]

Even though my time is too valuable for me to spend this much time typing, and repeating myself, I did want to respond to "Paradise". It does matter that she's married. Now I'm not going to waste more time explaining anything else to you, because you will only argue. Spend some time on your search engine of choice.

To Snostar, I always enjoy your posts. A topic such as this with very old "*******y" laws being applied to newer, lower (or perhaps just different?) levels of morality always invites debate. That's a good thing, yes? We'll all be smarter in the end.


Finally, good luck to the OP. Keep us posted. Back to work for me. sigh

Apparently it is not too valuable, because you are typing. What are the exact rights of the bio father here? Care to further explain how he has none?

 

[snostar]

Ladies, it is time for me to no longer reply to this thread, I think there has been many valuable perspectives presented, and now if the father files it will be left up to the judge........Have a wonderful day, I know I will.