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I need help with a paternity question

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Amommyx03

Guest
undefined :confused: What is the name of your state?Alabama
I have been married for 10 years to a wonderful guy. In 2000 we seperated for 2 months and I had a one night stand with an old bf. well, i found out I was pregnant. I told my husband right away about the affair and the pregnancy. We got back together for the child plus our oldest daughter. My son is now 3yrs old and he has alot of health history. He has been dx with apraxia and has chiari type 1 malformation. He sees a speech therapist and an ot. Well recently i received an email from 1 night stand saying he is going to file with courts for paternity test. Everything I have read states that a child born in a marriage is concidered the husbands child. I am scared because my child doesn't know this man and the man has no idea how to take care of a special needs child. How can I pervent this happening? Does he have a legal claim to my son?
My husband has been there every step of the way with this little boy. I'm so scared that this will harm my child.
Amommy
 


rmet4nzkx

Senior Member
While it is presumed the husband in a marriage is the legal father, the biological father has the right to ask for a DNA test. He could be responsible for child support from the point it is proved, possibly additional due to the disability and also reasonable visitation rights. It is good you were honest with your husband so he can continue to be supportive to you and your child.

Since Chari malformations are genetically linked, it is in the best interest of your child that the biological father be involved for many reasons. He can learn about a special needs child just as you did, it will take time, just as it took time for you to learn. It may have additional benefit if he is able to learn how to care for your child and that you will have some respite, which you will need from time to time. Think of it as a positive thing that he want's to be involved in his child's life, no child should be denied the love and concern of their parents, especially a special needs child, children need all the love they can get.
Here is a link to a project at Duke university seeking families for research:
Chiari Malformations and Syringomyelia - For Patients and Families... for causative genes, the CHG researchers are currently recruiting families who have two or more members with diagnosed Chiari type 1 malformation, with or ... http://www.chg.duke.edu/patients/cms.html
 

rmet4nzkx

Senior Member
Here is the section on paternity:
Alabama Code
Title 26 Infants and Incompetents
Chapter 17 Alabama Uniform Parentage Act
Establishing Paternity

Establishing paternity gives a child born outside of marriage the same legal rights as a child born to married parents. Children with legal fathers are entitled to benefits through their fathers that may include Social Security benefits, veteran's benefits and inheritance rights. Children may also benefit by knowing their biological family';s cultural and medical history. Either parent may take action to legally establish paternity. The process may begin at any time, until the child attains the age of majority. In Alabama, the age of majority is 19.

When a married couple has a child, the law automatically recognizes the husband as the father. When an unmarried woman has a child, an official act is needed to establish the legal father of the child. This is called establishing paternity. Sometimes a parent may want proof that the man is the biological father of the child. In that case, a genetic test will be used to show that either the man is not the biological father (he is excluded), or, that there is an extremely high probability that the man is the father of the child. The results of a genetic test are then used by the court as evidence of parentage. A court order will then be issued establishing paternity.

The State of Alabama will use these three possible types of processes to establish paternity:

1. Uncontested consent process:
This process requires both the mother and the alleged father to agree that the alleged father is the biological father of the minor child. The parties can do this by completing an Affidavit of Paternity either through the in-hospital process before leaving the birthing hospital or at a later time.

* Affidavit of Paternity
This affidavit, if properly signed and notarized, creates a legal finding of paternity under Alabama law. It is a legally sufficient basis for establishing an obligation for child support and birth expenses. This form can be completed anytime after the child's birth and before the child's nineteenth birthday. This form can be obtained at any county DHR office.

* In-Hospital Paternity
All birthing hospitals must allow unmarried mothers and alleged fathers the opportunity to sign an affidavit of paternity at the time of their child’s birth.

2. Administrative process:
This process gives the Department of Human Resources the authority to administratively order genetic testing. In most cases, this eliminates the need to involve the court in genetic testing. However, the court must issue an order establishing paternity and support.

3. Contested judicial process:
The contested judicial process is used when the alleged father refuses to acknowledge paternity or when the alleged father and/or mother refuse to cooperate with administrative genetic testing.

Child Support Order Establishment

Court order establishment refers to court actions to obtain an order for child support, medical support or possibly retroactive support. The court uses the Alabama Child Support Guidelines based upon Alabama State Law (Rule 32 of the Alabama Rules of Judicial Administration) to make fair and consistent support orders. Copies of the guidelines are available to the public free of charge at court clerk's offices throughout the state, or online at www.alacourt.org/case/child/rule32.htm. The guidelines are based on the monthly gross income of both parents. There are other things taken into consideration such as day care expenses, health insurance costs and additional children for whom support is court ordered or provided. Situations that may require the establishment of a support order could be one of the following:

Separation Cases
* This is when the parents of a child(ren) are married but separated, and the non-custodial parent is not providing support for the child(ren) and has no court order to do so.

Paternity Cases
* When the court establishes paternity, it must also issue an order addressing support, medical support and an order for Income Withholding. In such cases, the court may also decide other issues such as child custody, visitation, court costs and genetic testing costs. The Department of Human Resources and the State's attorney, however, can only address matters of child support.

Affidavit of Paternity cases
* This is when the mother and the alleged father complete an Affidavit of Paternity at the hospital or at the Department of Human Resources Office.

Divorce cases
* This is when the parent of a child or children are divorced and there is no provision for child support or medical support in the divorce order. If there are custody, visitation or other non child support related issues, you may need to seek legal counsel to represent your interest in these issues.

Foster Care cases
* These are cases where children are in the custody of or are receiving out-of-home care from a State agency.

Periodic Review and Adjustment of Child Support Orders

The Review and Adjustment process is used to determine if the support amount is in accordance with the child support guidelines and/or to determine if medical support needs to be added to the order. DHR will only review orders once every 36 months, unless a significant change such as a financial windfall or a severe medical crisis occurs. The request must be made in writing and state why you believe the order should be changed. If our review finds that your support order should be changed (modified), we will prepare the legal papers and arrange a court hearing for you. In some cases both parties may agree to a modification and a court hearing will not be necessary. If an agreement cannot be reached, the judge will make the final decision about whether an order will be changed.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
Amommyx03 said:
undefined :confused: What is the name of your state?Alabama
I have been married for 10 years to a wonderful guy. In 2000 we seperated for 2 months and I had a one night stand with an old bf. well, i found out I was pregnant. I told my husband right away about the affair and the pregnancy. We got back together for the child plus our oldest daughter. My son is now 3yrs old and he has alot of health history. He has been dx with apraxia and has chiari type 1 malformation. He sees a speech therapist and an ot. Well recently i received an email from 1 night stand saying he is going to file with courts for paternity test. Everything I have read states that a child born in a marriage is concidered the husbands child. I am scared because my child doesn't know this man and the man has no idea how to take care of a special needs child. How can I pervent this happening? Does he have a legal claim to my son?
My husband has been there every step of the way with this little boy. I'm so scared that this will harm my child.
Amommy
I will add some additional information that the other posters haven't given you. It is possible (not guaranteed by any means but possible) to fight the paternity case and get a judge to refuse to order the DNA test. There is some presumption to a right of privacy within a marriage. It may be possible to force the guy to prove that the one night stand even happened before the judge orders the test. Get a consult with an attorney.
 

snostar

Senior Member
LdiJ said:
I will add some additional information that the other posters haven't given you. It is possible (not guaranteed by any means but possible) to fight the paternity case and get a judge to refuse to order the DNA test. There is some presumption to a right of privacy within a marriage. It may be possible to force the guy to prove that the one night stand even happened before the judge orders the test. Get a consult with an attorney.
I agree, if the mother simply denies any involvement with this man it is extremely unlikely a judge will force her to take a DNA test.
 

rmet4nzkx

Senior Member
Ldij,
She already admitted the one night stand and the pregnancy which occurred during their separation, to her husband and that lead to their reconcilliation. Therefore she would be estoppeled from contradicting that at this point. Most likely this came form receiving treatment for their child and DNA testing would be desireable for the treatment of the child and their best interest.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
rmet4nzkx said:
Ldij,
She already admitted the one night stand and the pregnancy which occurred during their separation, to her husband and that lead to their reconcilliation. Therefore she would be estoppeled from contradicting that at this point. Most likely this came form receiving treatment for their child and DNA testing would be desireable for the treatment of the child and their best interest.
While I agree that there might be some medical benefit in establishing the biological paternity of the guy...you are inaccurate (IMO) on the rest. She does not need to deny that he is the biological father in order to ask the judge to require him to prove that there is some chance that he is. Her attorney would simply ask the judge to require him to provide some proof of a sexual relationship without confirming OR denying. In other words, to prove that there is some basis to give him standing to request the DNA test. Please think about it. A total stranger/stalker/nutcase could file for paternity if the law did not allow for a demand to prove standing.

Definition of Estoppel:

ESTOPPEL - (estopped) A bar which precludes someone from denying the truth of a fact which has been determined in an official proceeding or by an authoritative body. An estopple arises when someone has done some act which the policy of the law will not permit her to deny.

Obviously based on the above definition estoppel does not apply here. In fact, if she is estopped from doing anything it would be to deny that her HUSBAND is the father of the child, since HIS paternity was established legally by the birth certificate. She is not estopped from keeping the private communication of husband and wife, private.
 

snostar

Senior Member
rmet4nzkx said:
Most likely this came form receiving treatment for their child and DNA testing would be desireable for the treatment of the child and their best interest.
There you go ASSUMING again. Poster, did you disclose the fact that your husband MAY not be the biological father to your child's physicians? The husband has been "presumed" the father by law for three years now. The fact that this man has waited 3 years to dispute paternity will certainly not help his case.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
snostar said:
There you go ASSUMING again. Poster, did you disclose the fact that your husband MAY not be the biological father to your child's physicians? The husband has been "presumed" the father by law for three years now. The fact that this man has waited 3 years to dispute paternity will certainly not help his case.
I don't know about Alabama, but in some states if the bio-father doesn't assert paternity rights by the time the child is 2, the father has no standing to do it later.
 

rmet4nzkx

Senior Member
She told her husband about the relationship during their separation, this was her bf. She told him about the pregnancy, he accepted the child as his own. She says nothing about whether the former bf even knew she was pregnant due to the brief nature of their relationship <2months and 1 sexual encounter.

Apparently during the course of genetic counseling, she revealed the child's bio father and contact was made and from that the desire to establish paternity. This would establish his standing before the court to seek DNA testing to establish paternity.

He would have rights also. He is being contacted. Someone is claiming he is the bio father of a child with a genetic disorder and they want to pry into his medical background, so it would seem wise to establish or prove false, paternity. This isn't a stalker.

I anticipated your arguments and printed out the applicipble Alabama codes re paternity and there is no time limit for requesting the test.

"Establishing paternity gives a child born outside of marriage the same legal rights as a child born to married parents. Children with legal fathers are entitled to benefits through their fathers that may include Social Security benefits, veteran's benefits and inheritance rights. Children may also benefit by knowing their biological family';s cultural and medical history. Either parent may take action to legally establish paternity. The process may begin at any time, until the child attains the age of majority. In Alabama, the age of majority is 19."

The child has a genetic disorder and it is important to know as much as possible about his family's medical history, the child's best interest has more weight than the individual parties right to privacy.
 
A

Amommyx03

Guest
only r parents know

snostar said:
There you go ASSUMING again. Poster, did you disclose the fact that your husband MAY not be the biological father to your child's physicians? The husband has been "presumed" the father by law for three years now. The fact that this man has waited 3 years to dispute paternity will certainly not help his case.
only r parents know that hubby isn't the father. all doctors go by hubby and i's medical history.
 
A

Amommyx03

Guest
rmet4nzkx said:
She told her husband about the relationship during their separation, this was her bf. She told him about the pregnancy, he accepted the child as his own. She says nothing about whether the former bf even knew she was pregnant due to the brief nature of their relationship <2months and 1 sexual encounter.

Apparently during the course of genetic counseling, she revealed the child's bio father and contact was made and from that the desire to establish paternity. This would establish his standing before the court to seek DNA testing to establish paternity.

He would have rights also. He is being contacted. Someone is claiming he is the bio father of a child with a genetic disorder and they want to pry into his medical background, so it would seem wise to establish or prove false, paternity. This isn't a stalker.
I anticipated your arguments and printed out the applicipble Alabama codes re paternity and there is no time limit for requesting the test.

"Establishing paternity gives a child born outside of marriage the same legal rights as a child born to married parents. Children with legal fathers are entitled to benefits through their fathers that may include Social Security benefits, veteran's benefits and inheritance rights. Children may also benefit by knowing their biological family';s cultural and medical history. Either parent may take action to legally establish paternity. The process may begin at any time, until the child attains the age of majority. In Alabama, the age of majority is 19."

The child has a genetic disorder and it is important to know as much as possible about his family's medical history, the child's best interest has more weight than the individual parties right to privacy.
child chiari isn't genetic...doctor has said so...i have not contacted xbf for anything. he seen me with the child and then started this crap...
 
A

Amommyx03

Guest
thanks all

undefinedthanks all some have been helpful. no one knows that hubby isn't biologocal father but the grandparents. We tell doctors of husband and mine medical history for said child. I have not contacted ex-bf for anything. he seen me with child and started this crap. :mad: in my eyes he has no claim to a 3yr he doesn't know. if we have to go to court it could put child in danger of losing his new found speech. he has to see speech therapy and an ot every week to help him. my son has been on a long road to learn to speak and i worry if this will harm him. he has a stable home with a mom, a dad, and 2 sisters(1 older and 1 younger). he has 3 sets of grandparents that he sees regularly. he is start pre-school this month. I'll fight anything he throws at us. just because (IF) a man can make a child that doesn't make him a daddy.
 

rmet4nzkx

Senior Member
Amommyx03 said:
undefinedthanks all some have been helpful. no one knows that hubby isn't biologocal father but the grandparents. We tell doctors of husband and mine medical history for said child. I have not contacted ex-bf for anything. he seen me with child and started this crap. :mad: in my eyes he has no claim to a 3yr he doesn't know. if we have to go to court it could put child in danger of losing his new found speech. he has to see speech therapy and an ot every week to help him. my son has been on a long road to learn to speak and i worry if this will harm him. he has a stable home with a mom, a dad, and 2 sisters(1 older and 1 younger). he has 3 sets of grandparents that he sees regularly. he is start pre-school this month. I'll fight anything he throws at us. just because (IF) a man can make a child that doesn't make him a daddy.
Forgive me for making the assumption that you gave the child's physicians a truthful medical history and what would naturally have followed genetic counseling for your child. If you are so concerned for your child's welfare, how does giving them a false medical/family history come even close to hurting him?

There is something wrong with this picture. Having more and accurate medical informaiton is in your child's best interest, there may be things you don't even know that will affect your child and his treatment. There is no reason to believe that having this informaiton will cause your child to regress, that makes no sense.

Please I understand you have a stable family and don't want to disrupt that, but if it is truly stable, then establishing paternity won't disrupt that, it may take some adjusting, but even visitation could be very structured. Unless there is some justifiable reason for denying access to his medical history and possible future interaction, let a judge decide that. The courts deal with custody issues, there wouldn't be a hudge public trial with your child on the witness stand and it would still be confidential.

Please tell your son's physician's that your husband is not your son's father, be honest with them. Start there, remember this is in his best interest. If the bio father wants to he can make a big issue of it and you won't be able to control it.
 

snostar

Senior Member
Apparently during the course of genetic counseling, she revealed the child's bio father and contact was made and from that the desire to establish paternity. This would establish his standing before the court to seek DNA testing to establish paternity.

He would have rights also. He is being contacted. Someone is claiming he is the bio father of a child with a genetic disorder and they want to pry into his medical background, so it would seem wise to establish or prove false, paternity. This isn't a stalker.
Again, this is nothing more than another assumption on your part. There is no doubt this man can file a petition to establish paternity. Your belief of what is in the child’s best interest is irrelevant, especially since it is based on very limited facts. The court will decide if the quality and conviction of the evidence presented is enough to order the parties to submit to a DNA test.

Alabama code also states:
(Section 26-17-5)
Presumption of Paternity; rebuttal
A presumption of paternity under this section may be rebutted in an appropriate action only by clear and convincing evidence. In the event two or more conflicting presumptions arise, that which is founded upon the weightier considerations of public policy and logic, as evidenced by the facts, shall control.

Amommy - if he follows through with filing in court contact an attorney to assist you. You may also find this link useful:
http://www.uslegalforms.com/lawdigest/paternity-law-digest.php/AL/AL-598P.htm
 

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