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interrogatories

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msdad

Member
What is the name of your state?oh
For those of you who know the story...

I got my first set of interrogatories. They want to know all kinds of crazy stuff that they already know the answers too. Like, what kind of visitation schedule is already in place, what school or any other functions I've taken my son to, what birthday presents I've sent. They also want all of my tax info from 1995! They want 3 months paystubs, what benefits I have available to me, if I've named my son as a beneficary on any insurance form. They know the answers to these. Why are they asking them? For the judge? If they can prove me wrong on one question my lawyer says that they will come after me FOR THEIR LAWYER'S FEES!!!

I never retained a lawyer when we went to court the first time, so I have to pay my lawyer 1,000, just to answer their questions.

I also got a LARGE envelope filled with medical bills that I owe half of from my ex. Dating back 8 years ago. Everything from surgeries to dental procedures, dental cleanings and glasses. He had two pairs of glasses in one year!!! I called the eye doctor, and he said that a pair had to get replaced because the first pair of glasses were broken. Why would I have to pay for that? OR any of these? Do I still owe these from so long ago?

All anger aside, are there any odds that I would win, to keep my sons name as it is now? This is getting expensive.
 


sirxamiel

Member
msdad said:
What is the name of your state?oh
For those of you who know the story...

I got my first set of interrogatories. They want to know all kinds of crazy stuff that they already know the answers too. Like, what kind of visitation schedule is already in place, what school or any other functions I've taken my son to, what birthday presents I've sent. They also want all of my tax info from 1995! They want 3 months paystubs, what benefits I have available to me, if I've named my son as a beneficary on any insurance form. They know the answers to these. Why are they asking them? For the judge? If they can prove me wrong on one question my lawyer says that they will come after me FOR THEIR LAWYER'S FEES!!!

I never retained a lawyer when we went to court the first time, so I have to pay my lawyer 1,000, just to answer their questions.

I also got a LARGE envelope filled with medical bills that I owe half of from my ex. Dating back 8 years ago. Everything from surgeries to dental procedures, dental cleanings and glasses. He had two pairs of glasses in one year!!! I called the eye doctor, and he said that a pair had to get replaced because the first pair of glasses were broken. Why would I have to pay for that? OR any of these? Do I still owe these from so long ago?

All anger aside, are there any odds that I would win, to keep my sons name as it is now? This is getting expensive.

First of all, who is "they"? I wouldnt think that anyone could change the name of the child without your permission. Secondly, if you have visitation already set, then I would suggest you follow the order. If the order which was signed by a judge requires you to release all that info, then you have to. Otherwise, if the judge didnt state in the order for you to relinquish all that info, then I wouldnt. None of those items has any involvement in your visitation with your child, the only thing that a court requires you to submit is your name,address, and phone number, and if you have insurance, normally a court will require you to provide insurance on your child. As far as any medical bills or eye exams for your child is concerned, then yes, a court can and will make you pay for half of the bills. After all, it is your child, and you should care enough for him to help pay for any medical assistance he may require. Sorry to sound harsh, but you did help have him, and you should be responsible enough to help raise and to help pay for his care. It doesnt matter how long ago it was when he had any treatment, you still should be responsible for half. You shouldnt put it all on the mother. If you expect to have the mother pay for ALL of the childs expenses such as medical care, dental, or eye exams, and you not have any part of the bills, then you need sign your rights over so that you dont have to worry about it anymore. Yes it gets expensive, but it would still be expensive even if you 2 were still together.
 

msdad

Member
Thanks for the input, but I'm not sure if you understand because I have never recieved a post from you before.

I've never seen my son. His mother went in for a name change for him. (middle and last) He never had my last name. I went in to contest it, because I don't want to pay child support anymore if he has his stepdads last name. "They" are my ex and her husband. Now, because I've contested this, they are slapping me with everything.
 

msdad

Member
My son is 9 years old, there has never been any visitation schedule. I've never seen him once. I was engaged to his mom, but I left her when she was pregant.
 
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S

sparky31676

Guest
msdad said:
Thanks for the input, but I'm not sure if you understand because I have never recieved a post from you before.

I've never seen my son. His mother went in for a name change for him. (middle and last) He never had my last name. I went in to contest it, because I don't want to pay child support anymore if he has his stepdads last name. "They" are my ex and her husband. Now, because I've contested this, they are slapping me with everything.

Did you forget your medication today?
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
They want all that information because they want to get it directly from you. Then when they depose you, they'll likely ask you some of the same questions to see if you answer the same way. And then again when they call you to the stand at trial. This is a direct result of the game you chose to play - but now they've upped the ante to play hardball. Have fun with it.

sirxamiel - you may want to read the history of this poster.
 
You are getting EXACTLY what you deserve. Do you have to pay for these things? Who are you kidding. Aren't you his "DAD"? That's what PARENTS do. You claim to be his "DAD", yet you don't want to be responsible for him... I have 2 daughters that wear glasses and believe me, kids break glasses and PARENTS have to replace them.
 

msdad

Member
stealth. Although you slam me left and right, you seem to be one of the only ones who gives advice with your opinions.

In the eyes of the courts, this is more seeming to be a losing battle for me. In anyones experience, do I have a chance to keep my sons name the way it is now given my history?
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
I've said it before, and I'll say it again. Given that he has not carried YOUR name, nor are you asking that his name be changed to YOUR name, nor have you done anything to be involved in your son's life, it is UNLIKELY that a judge will grant your request.
 

msdad

Member
What if I start a suit to change his name to mine? Would the judge be likely to either change his name to mine and/or keep it as it is, so it would not be the mothers or step fathers last name?
 

sirxamiel

Member
stealth2 said:
They want all that information because they want to get it directly from you. Then when they depose you, they'll likely ask you some of the same questions to see if you answer the same way. And then again when they call you to the stand at trial. This is a direct result of the game you chose to play - but now they've upped the ante to play hardball. Have fun with it.

sirxamiel - you may want to read the history of this poster.
Sorry stealth. I havent read the history. But it seems this guy has really taken the wrong direction in his case. Maybe Im wrong, but what he wrote just seemed a little strange. It seems to me that he doesnt want things the way they should be, but rather the way he wants them to be. But thats only my opinion. I hope I dont offend anyone, as I myself need advice as well, so if I offend anyone with any replies, I apologize!
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
msdad said:
What if I start a suit to change his name to mine? Would the judge be likely to either change his name to mine and/or keep it as it is, so it would not be the mothers or step fathers last name?
At this point, with your history of no involvement in your son's life whatsoever, I would seriously doubt it. You're tilting at windmills. What you are doing is going to end up as extremely damaging to your son - YOU don't want to be a Dad, but you don't want anyone else to be his Dad either. It's time for you to stop playing games. Either grow up and take responsibility as a father, or allow your boy to grow up with the Dad he has had for nine years. But stop f*cking around.
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
sirxamiel said:
Sorry stealth. I havent read the history. But it seems this guy has really taken the wrong direction in his case. Maybe Im wrong, but what he wrote just seemed a little strange. It seems to me that he doesnt want things the way they should be, but rather the way he wants them to be. But thats only my opinion. I hope I dont offend anyone, as I myself need advice as well, so if I offend anyone with any replies, I apologize!
That's it in a nutshell. I find reading past posts can be very helpful. Sometimes you think "man, what an idiot" until you read the back story and see that it's due to circumstance. And sometimes you think, "geeez, poor schmuck" and come to find that your reaction to the first poster is more accurate.
 

sirxamiel

Member
msdad said:
What if I start a suit to change his name to mine? Would the judge be likely to either change his name to mine and/or keep it as it is, so it would not be the mothers or step fathers last name?
Look dude, if you dont want to be a father, then leave it alone and let someone be a father to that child who wants to be one. You dont want to pay for anything, you havent seen your son in 9 years, and your son doesnt even carry your last name!!! What are you trying to do? Look, you need to stop fooling around, and stand up and be a man, and accept responsibility for your actions. You need to establish a visitation with your son, establish a relationship for a good while, and then, and only then perhaps you can have some things done in your favor. But until then, you are fighting a losing battle, because you have nothing at this point to fight with!!
 

casa

Senior Member
msdad said:
What is the name of your state?oh
For those of you who know the story...

I got my first set of interrogatories. They want to know all kinds of crazy stuff that they already know the answers too. Like, what kind of visitation schedule is already in place, what school or any other functions I've taken my son to, what birthday presents I've sent. They also want all of my tax info from 1995! They want 3 months paystubs, what benefits I have available to me, if I've named my son as a beneficary on any insurance form. They know the answers to these. Why are they asking them? For the judge? If they can prove me wrong on one question my lawyer says that they will come after me FOR THEIR LAWYER'S FEES!!!

I never retained a lawyer when we went to court the first time, so I have to pay my lawyer 1,000, just to answer their questions.

I also got a LARGE envelope filled with medical bills that I owe half of from my ex. Dating back 8 years ago. Everything from surgeries to dental procedures, dental cleanings and glasses. He had two pairs of glasses in one year!!! I called the eye doctor, and he said that a pair had to get replaced because the first pair of glasses were broken. Why would I have to pay for that? OR any of these? Do I still owe these from so long ago?

All anger aside, are there any odds that I would win, to keep my sons name as it is now? This is getting expensive.

Newsflash: 2 pairs of glasses in a year is not only normal, but it could have been more! Most times with small children they want them in for exams every 6 months. My daughter went through 4 glasses in one year once- kids play, glasses fall off or get scratched. You'd know that if you were ever involved with your child in his life! :mad:

If your sons name was every yours in the first place, AND you were active in his life, you'd have a chance at denying a name change- but your son NEVER HAD YOUR NAME to begin with and you NEVER CARED for the last 9 years, so how are you going to explain not wanting him to have the same last name as every other member of his FAMILY now?

Remember when you said "This is easy!" :rolleyes: Ha Ha that comment is biting you in the butt now, isn't it? :D Remember when you found it amusing you stressed your son's mother out so much her hair was falling out? :rolleyes: Why should we feel sorry the stress answering financial questions is causing you? :p

As far as the medical bills- If you want rights to claim your son via your name, then you shouldn't have any problem paying your fair share (1/2) of the co-pays and medical costs that his mother has carried the burden of alone for all these years. If you were involved in his life, you'd know what the bills were for- how he did with the various procedures- and paid your share as it went along instead of one lump sum. Go back and read the original custody and child support order- If you are responsible for part of the costs...then you will be paying them.

You deliberately disrupted this young boy's life after emotionally and physicall abandoning him for 9 years - and you did it out of spite to the stepfather who has been his DAD his whole life. You deserve what you get! :D
 

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