looking for answers

[QueenOfTheHill]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?Indiana

This post is about my sons situation. I know you frown on third party posts here,so I apologize for that. I'm not butting in to his situation,just trying to gather some info so I can point him in the right direction.His plan right now is to do nothing,but I expect in the next few days he will start looking for answers. I do intend to point him in the direction of an attorney,if it's something he can't do himself.

Son has a 4 month old,with a girl he is not married to. He signed the AOP at birth. No custody /visitation or support orders exist.

They have all been living together up until today when the gf moved out and took the baby.

Mom has stayed home to care for the baby since her birth.Does this automatically make her the primary caretaker?

She has left and went to her Mothers,which is in a different county than where they all lived together. Where would the proper place be to file anything with the courts? The county they live in?The county the Mother is now in-which is also the county the baby was born in?

Mom is awaiting trial,or for her plea to be accepted ,on 2 charges. I believe theft and fraud.(forged a prescription and filled it) Her lawyer is telling her she may do a couple yrs jail time,although some of that time may be house arrest, or work release.(she doesn't have a job)

I assume he should file for a custody/visitation order?Can he ask that the baby be returned to his home? Since she did take the baby from his home,would he file it as an emergency motion?(there is no danger to the baby) He has lived with the baby since birth,but wants to avoid going a lengthy time period without seeing her.If it takes months to get a court date,won't they require a very limited visitation to start out? Indiana seems big on keeping with the "gradual visitation" for young infants.But Dad and baby have already bonded.He doesn't want to lose that.

Again,I apologize for the third party status. Son is busy drowning in a pool of self pity right now.He'll be ok in a day or two. If I left out anything pertinent,just ask. Thanks.

[Ohiogal]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?Indiana

This post is about my sons situation. I know you frown on third party posts here,so I apologize for that. I'm not butting in to his situation,just trying to gather some info so I can point him in the right direction.His plan right now is to do nothing,but I expect in the next few days he will start looking for answers. I do intend to point him in the direction of an attorney,if it's something he can't do himself.

Son has a 4 month old,with a girl he is not married to. He signed the AOP at birth. No custody /visitation or support orders exist.

They have all been living together up until today when the gf moved out and took the baby.

When was that day and where did she move to?

Mom has stayed home to care for the baby since her birth.Does this automatically make her the primary caretaker?

Yep. NOrmally.

She has left and went to her Mothers,which is in a different county than where they all lived together. Where would the proper place be to file anything with the courts? The county they live in?The county the Mother is now in-which is also the county the baby was born in?

How long has she lived in that county? How long did they live together in this county?

Mom is awaiting trial,or for her plea to be accepted ,on 2 charges. I believe theft and fraud.(forged a prescription and filled it) Her lawyer is telling her she may do a couple yrs jail time,although some of that time may be house arrest, or work release.(she doesn't have a job)

And when did she catch those charges? While living with your son?

I assume he should file for a custody/visitation order?

Yep. If he wants to see his child.

Can he ask that the baby be returned to his home?

Yep.

Since she did take the baby from his home,would he file it as an emergency motion?(there is no danger to the baby)

Nope.

He has lived with the baby since birth,but wants to avoid going a lengthy time period without seeing her.If it takes months to get a court date,won't they require a very limited visitation to start out? Indiana seems big on keeping with the "gradual visitation" for young infants.But Dad and baby have already bonded.He doesn't want to lose that.

How long ago did she move out? He needs to file ASAP to get something started.

Again,I apologize for the third party status. Son is busy drowning in a pool of self pity right now.He'll be ok in a day or two. If I left out anything pertinent,just ask. Thanks.

Tell him to put his floaties on and get out of the water -- he has to put on his big boy pants and start DOING something if he wants to be a parent.

[QueenOfTheHill]

Mom left the home Tues,11/18, and moving her stuff out Wed.,11/19.

Mom lived in County A all her life. Mom and Dad lived together in County B since April 08.

Her legal issues started before my son started seeing her. He didn't know about it until she was already pregnant. He did know about it before he got a place with her.

I thought a day or 2 to adjust would be o.k.,but I'll tell him parents have to do it overnight. If you tell me the appropriate place to file is County B,it will be done by the end of the day. County A may take a few days for him to get time off work.

Thanks so much.

[Ohiogal]

Originally Posted by QueenOfTheHill

Mom left the home Tues,11/18, and moving her stuff out Wed.,11/19.

Mom lived in County A all her life. Mom and Dad lived together in County B since April 08.

Her legal issues started before my son started seeing her. He didn't know about it until she was already pregnant. He did know about it before he got a place with her.

I thought a day or 2 to adjust would be o.k.,but I'll tell him parents have to do it overnight. If you tell me the appropriate place to file is County B,it will be done by the end of the day. County A may take a few days for him to get time off work.

Thanks so much.

Dad needs to file in County B (provided they are both in the same state) immediately.

[LdiJ]

Originally Posted by QueenOfTheHill

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?Indiana

This post is about my sons situation. I know you frown on third party posts here,so I apologize for that. I'm not butting in to his situation,just trying to gather some info so I can point him in the right direction.His plan right now is to do nothing,but I expect in the next few days he will start looking for answers. I do intend to point him in the direction of an attorney,if it's something he can't do himself.

Son has a 4 month old,with a girl he is not married to. He signed the AOP at birth. No custody /visitation or support orders exist.

They have all been living together up until today when the gf moved out and took the baby.

Mom has stayed home to care for the baby since her birth.Does this automatically make her the primary caretaker?

She has left and went to her Mothers,which is in a different county than where they all lived together. Where would the proper place be to file anything with the courts? The county they live in?The county the Mother is now in-which is also the county the baby was born in?

Mom is awaiting trial,or for her plea to be accepted ,on 2 charges. I believe theft and fraud.(forged a prescription and filled it) Her lawyer is telling her she may do a couple yrs jail time,although some of that time may be house arrest, or work release.(she doesn't have a job)

I assume he should file for a custody/visitation order?Can he ask that the baby be returned to his home? Since she did take the baby from his home,would he file it as an emergency motion?(there is no danger to the baby) He has lived with the baby since birth,but wants to avoid going a lengthy time period without seeing her.If it takes months to get a court date,won't they require a very limited visitation to start out? Indiana seems big on keeping with the "gradual visitation" for young infants.But Dad and baby have already bonded.He doesn't want to lose that.

Again,I apologize for the third party status. Son is busy drowning in a pool of self pity right now.He'll be ok in a day or two. If I left out anything pertinent,just ask. Thanks.

In Indiana, an unwed mother automatically has sole legal and physical custody until a judge decides otherwise. Therefore no, he cannot have the baby returned to his home, and no, he cannot file an emergency motion because there is no valid emergency.

Do a google search for the Indiana Parenting Time Guidelines. That is what 99% of what Indiana judges will order 99% of the time.

My recommendation is that he file for joint legal custody (joint decision making) and parenting time under the ITPG as soon as possible. The case will go more rapidly if he goes for that. Then, he should wait and see what happens with mom's criminal case. If mom does time, then he will be virtually guaranteed to receive primary custody of the child.

[QueenOfTheHill]

I'm keeping all my questions in this thread per the rules,so that's why I've drug up an old thread.

My son pretty much disregarded my advice because he reconciled with the Mother.Still nothing has been court ordered.But things have changed dramatically.

Mother will be going to jail sometime mid-July.It looks like she will be serving 6 months jail time,followed by 6 months house arrest and then probation.

Son moved out of the home a few weeks ago.Mother apparently has a prescription medication habit (zanax,lortab,klonopin),although these 2 yr old charges are the only proof of such.

It's all a sordid ugly story,and my son is far from an angel or blameless in it all.He did FINALLY go to the courthouse to get the ball rolling.He has a court date end of July.

Yesterday,the maternal grandmother informed us that she had acquired legal guardianship of his daughter.This was done without my sons knowledge.He's on fairly decent terms with the grandma,and she is letting him have visitation with his daughter.Since he has not been legally established as father yet,do they not have to notify him?He did sign the AOP. Also,this was done in a county that is NOT the childs legal residence.Son filed his paperwork in the childs legal county. (I have no idea if the Mom agreed to do it in a different county)

He is wanting to get custody of his daughter,and has finally started the process.Is this guardianship coming from a different county going to cause him problems? Can he have it thrown out due to wrong jurisdiction?

The Mom has been behaving extremely erratic the last several weeks,and maternal grandma now has her on supervised visits.She can't have the baby overnight,or leave the grandma's home with the baby.

Son doesn't want to rock the boat too much,since grandma is being agreeable to him having the baby. But-she's his daughter. She should be with her parent.

I'm not sure if grandma has ulterior motives,or if she will fight my son for custody.

What's his easiest,and cheapest plan of action?

He's waiting on a call back from an attorney.But the county matters in that regard too.He wants someone familiar with the county it will be heard in.

[Ohiogal]

]I'm keeping all my questions in this thread per the rules,so that's why I've drug up an old thread.

My son pretty much disregarded my advice because he reconciled with the Mother.Still nothing has been court ordered.But things have changed dramatically.

Mother will be going to jail sometime mid-July.It looks like she will be serving 6 months jail time,followed by 6 months house arrest and then probation.

Son moved out of the home a few weeks ago.Mother apparently has a prescription medication habit (zanax,lortab,klonopin),although these 2 yr old charges are the only proof of such.

It's all a sordid ugly story,and my son is far from an angel or blameless in it all.He did FINALLY go to the courthouse to get the ball rolling.He has a court date end of July.

That is good.

Yesterday,the maternal grandmother informed us that she had acquired legal guardianship of his daughter.This was done without my sons knowledge.He's on fairly decent terms with the grandma,and she is letting him have visitation with his daughter.Since he has not been legally established as father yet,do they not have to notify him?He did sign the AOP.

He should have been notified of the legal guardianship due to being on the birth certificate as daddy.

Also,this was done in a county that is NOT the childs legal residence.Son filed his paperwork in the childs legal county. (I have no idea if the Mom agreed to do it in a different county)

Dad would have had to agree as well.

He is wanting to get custody of his daughter,and has finally started the process.Is this guardianship coming from a different county going to cause him problems? Can he have it thrown out due to wrong jurisdiction?

He should immediately file in the county guardianship was granted and reference the case he has going in the proper county as well as state that he has never served and he has acknowledged paternity legally by signing an AOP.

The Mom has been behaving extremely erratic the last several weeks,and maternal grandma now has her on supervised visits.She can't have the baby overnight,or leave the grandma's home with the baby.

Okay.

Son doesn't want to rock the boat too much,since grandma is being agreeable to him having the baby. But-she's his daughter. She should be with her parent.

Son not rocking the boat could mean he loses his child to grandma's custody.

I'm not sure if grandma has ulterior motives,or if she will fight my son for custody.

What's his easiest,and cheapest plan of action?

Do the above.

He's waiting on a call back from an attorney.But the county matters in that regard too.He wants someone familiar with the county it will be heard in.

Many attorneys work in several counties.

[LdiJ]

Grandma, I truly believe that you should help your son get an attorney. The fact that the other grandma pulled off getting guardianship is problematic, and it will go smoother for your son if he has an attorney navigating the legal waters.

[QueenOfTheHill]

Thanks. I do intend to hire a lawyer for him. I've found one that practices in both counties,just waiting on him to return from vacation (next Tuesday according to his staff).Hoping he will take the case.

Mom voluntarily signed the guardianship papers,I assume in preparation for going to jail.She had no idea her mom would keep her from the child.

He was only willing to let it ride until his court date comes around,because for the last week mom has not allowed him contact with the child.And because the grandma has control right now,he knows the baby is safe.

[QueenOfTheHill]

update: Son filed for relief from judgment in the guardianship matter. Got a court date. A week before the court date,grandma filed to voluntarily remove the guardianship. Son has had his daughter pretty much full time the last couple months. Mom gets her one or two days a week,depending on her work schedule.

Custody hearing is next Monday. Mom is going to jail sometime this week. Today son had a meeting with his lawyer.They had a phone conference which included son,grandma,grandma's lawyer,and Mom. Mom agreed to Dad having residential custody.

When she gets out of jail,she will have no home. She COULD live with her mom,but she won't. Since she won't have a home,son asked that her visits be supervised by Dad or grandma. Mom agreed to this! Since she agreed to supervised visits,will he have sole custody instead of joint?

He had one court date already.They established paternity.The judge would not issue a custody order with the guardianship in existence.He ordered that Dad get the guardianship revoked or the guardian would have to attend the custody hearing.

I guess I don't really have a question. Just wanted to update.I've read this site regularly for years,and always wonder what happened in a lot of the threads. Hate it when they don't come back and update.

So he will have the custody hearing Monday,so they can agree to parenting time and support for Mom.(unless Mom totally flipflops,she's done it before)

I have learned so much from this site. I kept my nose mostly out of it. I hired my son a lawyer.(I really did this more for my granddaughter though.I was worried what her life could be like) I know the other grandma was not actually wanting to raise the baby. She got this guardianship in an effort to control her daughter,is my guess. But what she did is ruin her relationship with her daughter. It wasn't good to begin with. I did attend a couple meetings between son and attorney.Son asked me to,and I wanted to make sure son was asking the right questions.But I swear,I did NOT overstep!!

[IsabellaSoriano]

i must say..looks good.

[Doxiemom]

Just wanted to say. I don't think you attending meetings with you son and his attourney is over stepping. In stressful situtations, it can be helpful to have a second person there there listening and taking notes, for later discussion. I don't consider that over-stepping, I think that is being supportive.