Lowering amount of CS agreed to in a MSA in Florida

[jbudden]

Florida

Long story short.

In April my ex-wife and I agree that since she pulled my daughter out of pre-school that my CS payment could be lowered from $250.00/mo down to $150.00/mo because paying for pre-school was the reason she gave for needing $250.00 a month. She stated to me that she needed the $250.00 in May but we would start the $150.00/mo in June. She says she'll get her sister-in-law, who is a paralegal, to write up an addendum to the MSA stating the change. I've been waiting for her to do it since. On June 30, I hand her fiancee' the check for $150.00 for June. Today she calls me up wanting to know where her other $100.00 is. She claims there never was any agreement.

She pulled this kind of crap a lot during the divorce. So much in fact that right before we settled, her attorney quit. She would agree to terms and then find some obscure reason to reneg on the agreement once her parents tugged her strings.

What really gets me is that I am disabled and am about to go on temporary welfare to survive. Her and her fiancee are not hurting for money. They just bought a brand new Saturn VUE SUV. Her fiancee's family owns a big auto salvage yard so they are all well off.

And she cannot tell me she spends $500.00 a month on our daughter without having her in preschool. There's no possible way.

Is there a way to do this without having to hire an attorney? There isn't a chance in hell of me affording one.

 

[stealth2]

All you can do is file for a modification with the court based on the change in circumstance of the cnild no longer being in preschool. You don't need a lawyer to do it, but the motion may or may not be granted. Until, however, the order is modified, you owe the $250. Be aware that it's actually a rather modest CS order.

 

[Elease]

Hummmm

Let me get this straight you want to go from paying $62.50 a week to "help" support your child to paying $37.50 a week because the step father & family is well off. Did the step father or his family have anything to do with the conseption of this child? Do they have any obligation to care for this child or to support this child? I think not. Ok...why dont you consider relinquishing parental rights and you wouldnt have to pay anything!! If you are disabled why havent you petitioned the court for a modification based on a significant change in circumstances on your part? This woman was a terror during your divorce, but you trusted her to be good for her word on an issue that could well land you in jail. Just curious..how often do you see this child? Every weekend? Twice a year? I am really sorry to sound so cynical, but I am just amazed at how hard noncustodial parents work to lessen an obligation to their children, all the while trying to justify it to the world. Preschool or no preschool, do you really think you can support a child on a total of 75 bucks a week...which is $37.50 from each parent? How long has it been since you were in the home with this child buying food, clothing, medical insurance, toys, making copays on noninsured medicines, Dr. visits..etc. 75 Bucks a week..wow that kid is really in the gravy. What a life ahead of this poor child with mommy and daddy working hard against each other.

 

[Whyte Noise]

Just a bit bitter are we Elease?

If him paying pre-school was the reason that the child support was set at a certain amount, and now, pre-school is no longer a part of the equation, then he most certainly does need to get it modified to reflect that. Let me turn this around on you... she used childcare as a reason to get a higher award of child support to start with. If she's not using childcare now (or pre-school, or whatever you want to call it) then SHE is obtaining money fraudulently.

How do you know that his child support wasn't already based on the fact that he's disabled and is on a fixed income? You don't. So don't assume anything. Seeing as how his CS is so low to begin with, it could just be that the courts already did figure CS with the disability in mind.

Doesn't matter how often he sees the child. He's paying what the court ordered him to pay. That's all the matters, right? The money? And mom is getting it.

It's amazing how people like you automatically assume that NCP's are all nothing but a bunch of deadbeats that want to get out of paying for anything for their child based on one single post on a message board. Is it too much to ask that he pay the RIGHT amount, and not the previous amount that's based on things that are no longer being paid for? Like the pre-school? Whoops, guess it is. It's an NCP wanting to decrease the CS for legal reasons, not a CP wanting to get an increase for legal reasons. Lord knows we can't have someone trying to decrease CS. That means they're a deadbeat.

To the OP: As for this statement... "And she cannot tell me she spends $500.00 a month on our daughter without having her in preschool. There's no possible way." You might want to rethink that one. My kids have more than that in just medications every month. Not counting clothes for them, shoes, food, etc. momma_tiger is right... your support is very low all things considered. But if your ex was getting $100 more a month because of the pre-school, and that is no longer a factor, then you do need to ask for it to be modified to reflect the actual costs now.

 

[stealth2]

Just a bit bitter are we Elease?

My original thought was "wow, talk about mouthy for a newbie." Especially after checking out her other posts.

 

[Elease]

Why do you assume a person is "bitter" if they are not in agreement with your stance? "Mouthy"? Wow..coming from Mama Tiger thats the pot calling the kettle black!! LOL Lets have a show of hands..how many of you custodidal parents out there can support a small child on $75 a week! Preschool or no preschool? Every state now has what is called a "Child Support Guidelines and Worksheet". For those of you who feel these poor noncustodial parents are giving blood..check out the figures. For those of you who are struggling to feed, clothe and care for a child with the grand contribution of the noncustodial parent of $37.50 a week or even $62.50, my hat is off to you. I will save my sympathies for the custodial parent who spends very little time with a child who needs them, because they are working two jobs to care for the child needs. The custodial parent who doesnt have health insurance for a small child who is disabled or who has allergies or worse. I see it every single day and if your concerns are with the poor disabled noncustodial parent go sit in the emergency room some evening and then tell me how awful you feel for this poor schmuck that thinks 62.50 a week is too much to give this child. OH..and Momma Tiger...I didnt know you had a limit as to how much can be said on this board..I was under the misguided impression it was an open board for "opinions". My Bad, Heir Momma Tiger!!

 

[stealth2]

f*ck off, leesie. On most boards, newbies take some time to become part of the community before getting bitchy. Walking in swinging doesn't make friends. I've earned my stripes here, so stick it.

As far as CS goes, Most CPs I know (male and female, btw) do not rely on the other parent to raise the kids (from a financial pov). It's great for the extras, but always a lousy idea to rely on it.

 

[Whyte Noise]

Why do you assume a person is "bitter" if they are not in agreement with your stance? "Mouthy"? Wow..coming from Mama Tiger thats the pot calling the kettle black!! LOL Lets have a show of hands..how many of you custodidal parents out there can support a small child on $75 a week! Preschool or no preschool? Every state now has what is called a "Child Support Guidelines and Worksheet". For those of you who feel these poor noncustodial parents are giving blood..check out the figures. For those of you who are struggling to feed, clothe and care for a child with the grand contribution of the noncustodial parent of $37.50 a week or even $62.50, my hat is off to you. I will save my sympathies for the custodial parent who spends very little time with a child who needs them, because they are working two jobs to care for the child needs. The custodial parent who doesnt have health insurance for a small child who is disabled or who has allergies or worse. I see it every single day and if your concerns are with the poor disabled noncustodial parent go sit in the emergency room some evening and then tell me how awful you feel for this poor schmuck that thinks 62.50 a week is too much to give this child. OH..and Momma Tiger...I didnt know you had a limit as to how much can be said on this board..I was under the misguided impression it was an open board for "opinions". My Bad, Heir Momma Tiger!!

I could personally care less if your "opinion" is in agreement with mine or not. That wasn't the point. The point is you came onto this post and started making accusations about an NCP based on your own warped sense of NCP reality. THAT is the point. You don't know the man, all you know is he's trying to reduce CS, and you just automatically assume that he's just another deadbeat and jump his ass because of it. Making your snide little off the cuff comments. You have no clue as to the mans situation, whether the court already DID base his CS on a disabilty check, whether the extra $100 was specifically for the pre-school costs (of which there are none anymore) or anything. You just jump on the bashing bandwagon simply because he's an NCP.

Let me give you another little tidbit too. As an NCP myself, I've done more for my childen in the past 34 days that I've had them than their father, who is the CP, has done in the past 3 years he's had them. Which includes, seeing a doctor and paying out over $500 for meds the first week I had them because they were medically neglected, setting up dental appointments for my children because they haven't even seen the inside of a dentists office in 3 years and have cavaties, teeth broken halfway off, and need braces, enrolling them in summer school to help them because 2 of the 3 failed last year due to their father's educational neglect and not giving a sh*t. So don't come off all high and mighty simply because you have a CP hair stuck up your ass. The custodial parent in MY case sucks out the ass, but you don't hear me on here bashing ALL CP's because of my ex, now do you? Your personal biases aren't asked for on this forum. Your answers to legal questions are. If you want to bash folks, then head on over to MAFIA.com or a score of the other boards that love to participate in such asinine drivel.

And just as a comment to your question of how many CP's can support a child on $75 a week... my ex-husband supported me, him, AND our 3 children on $200 a week. Divide that by 5 and tell me what you come up with. Whoops again.... that's not just a CP though, is it? We were still married at the time, and I was a SAHM.

Personally, I save my sympathies for the PARENT, custodial or non, that struggles to be in their children's lives and provide for them. I could care less about a label a court gives them. Because in my book, whether the kids actually live with them, or "visit" them courtesy of our esteemed court orders, they are first and foremost a PARENT. And suprisingly, if you look at the last word of CP or NCP... guess what you come up with?

 

[stealth2]

Great post, BLCM. Not that it's going to penetrate.

 

[Whyte Noise]

Yeah, I know momma.

Some people only have one brain cell left that still fires, and it miscues quite often.

I'm just waiting on Elease to have another brain fart moment and come off with...."You're a female and an NCP? What did you do? Abuse your kids or something? Do drugs? You HAD to do something!!"

LMAO

Like I've said before.... Minds are like parachutes. They only function when open.

 

[stealth2]

Quite early this morning, I read a post to hers in a thread I'd posted to. My first thought really was "Wow. Talk about mouthy." Then I read her other 6 posts - and that thought didn't change. Then I looked at her profile, and thought "Huh. A paralegal - you'd think she'd have more of a clue." I'm now back to "Wow. Talk about mouthy."

Some folks need to take a moment to pull the foot out of their mouth before saying anything.

(edit) And I can't help wonder if leesie meant "Herr" momma tiger implying a ****-ist trait. If so, she's not only a a$$, but an idiot.

(edit2) Interesting that N*zi is a censored term here (in case that gets starred out - I'm talking about Germans who ruled Germany during WWII. By Hitler.

 

[theother]

You tell her, ladies! Great posts.

It's really telling that Elease can't even find compassion for a NCP who is disabled, on welfare, and is paying his CS. Oh, but I forgot. ALL NCP's are evil deadbeats who could care less if their children starve and ALL CP's are glorious, selfless, saints that have to struggle because of the evil NCP's. Yeah, right.

 

[Whyte Noise]

(And I can't help wonder if leesie meant "Herr" momma tiger implying a ****-ist trait. If so, she's not only a a$$, but an idiot.

I thought maybe she knew something about a financial windfall that was coming your way....Like maybe you were a "lost" Hilton sister or the like.

 

[Elease]

This is not the forum for legal advice. For those of you who are not educated, legal advice can only be given by an attorney. In twenty-five years in the legal field, I have not once heard of or had a client come to me and say..."I am a noncustodial parent, I have had a huge raise..I want to pay more child support because my kids need it and deserve it." Wonder why that is? hummmmm Well at least I managed to get some of you thinking and some of you..well... Statistics prove there are more deadbeat noncustodial parents out there than deadbeat custodial parents. Now if you know the law, that comment will make sense to you and if you dont..then keep your ignorance to yourself. And by the way..I am not a newbie, I have been on this board for a very, very long time.

 

[kat1963]

Perhaps you would be better fulfilled by posting on the psychic network bulletin board. Myself, I find it freaking outstanding (!!!!) that even though you live miles apart from this poster you seem to know he makes more then minimum wage!

jbudden: Go to www.supportguidelines.com for additional information on how the private welfare works in your state.

KAT