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MI- custody when one parent moves away suddenly.

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Silverplum

Senior Member
I told dad that I would cooperate with putting her on a plane if he could give me proof of a round trip ticket for the correct dates. He is insisting that our court order automatically reverts to what it was before he moved back to MI from TN.

What do you mean by "wasn't an issue before"? The warrant was issued the second week of May.
He has stated to me that they do not have anywhere to live, have no jobs there, and are relying on donations from friends for the gas money to get to OR.
You'll be dealing with a long-distance parenting time schedule for the foreseeable future. Why not start cooperatively? If the receiving parent picks up, why does he have to purchase round-trip tickets?

Tinkerbelleluvr has dealt admirably with a similar problem, also in MI: look up her posts and learn from her.
 


Ohiogal

Queen Bee
I do plenty of things I'm not court ordered to do.
In fact, I've been an incredibly reasonable ex-wife for a while now, which is why this is a huge slap in the face.

I just wanted to know what I have the legal *right* to do, because he's making all kinds of noise about what I "have" to do because of our previous court order. I told him that if he provided transportation for the time he currently has, and provides proof of the round trip ticket, I will be happy to deliver her to the airport.

He is stating that I "have" to bring her to the airport, and that he "will" be taking her for all her breaks from school, when he can afford airfare. *That* is why I am posting.
You take her to the airport. You are responsible for paying for the plane ticket home at the end of the time. Dad is then required to take the child to the airport. HE doesn't have to provide proof of round trip when YOU per your court order are responsible for picking up. You pay the return fare.
 

anisaerah

Member
You'll be dealing with a long-distance parenting time schedule for the foreseeable future. Why not start cooperatively? If the receiving parent picks up, why does he have to purchase round-trip tickets?

Tinkerbelleluvr has dealt admirably with a similar problem, also in MI: look up her posts and learn from her.
Because I am currently supporting our daughter completely on my own, and did not make the decision for them to move so far away, I do not see why I should have to pay for plane tickets.

When he lived out of state previously, the court ordered that he pay for all transportation, and that he had to provide proof of a round trip ticket for the proper dates ahead of time. (This after he attempted to withhold our daughter by refusing to purchase a return flight).

Our current court order assumes that we live in the same metro area.

Edit: Tinkerbellelvr's situation is different than mine in that she was the one who chose to move out of state, with their child.

If I wanted to move our child away from her father, I would *expect* that I would be required to shoulder the cost of the extra transportation myself. But that's not my situation.
 
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anisaerah

Member
You take her to the airport. You are responsible for paying for the plane ticket home at the end of the time. Dad is then required to take the child to the airport. HE doesn't have to provide proof of round trip when YOU per your court order are responsible for picking up. You pay the return fare.
Do you think the court will order this even though in the past he was required to pay for all transportation, provide proof of round trip airfare, and is currently thousands behind in child support?
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
Because I am currently supporting our daughter completely on my own, and did not make the decision for them to move so far away, I do not see why I should have to pay for plane tickets.

When he lived out of state previously, the court ordered that he pay for all transportation, and that he had to provide proof of a round trip ticket for the proper dates ahead of time. (This after he attempted to withhold our daughter by refusing to purchase a return flight).

Our current court order assumes that we live in the same metro area.
So you want to rely on the prior order but dad shouldn't rely on the prior order -- you are a hypocrite in that regard. File a motion to show cause on the child support. Until a new court order is in place, you each share transportation costs.
 
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Ohiogal

Queen Bee
Do you think the court will order this even though in the past he was required to pay for all transportation, provide proof of round trip airfare, and is currently thousands behind in child support?
You send her and file in court to modify the current parenting schedule. You don't get to state that the prior order stated he had to pay all transportation (and you want to abide by that) but he has to go to court to get the prior parenting schedule for when he lived out of state.
 
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anisaerah

Member
So you want to rely on the prior order but dad shouldn't rely on the prior order -- you are a hypocrite in that regard. File a motion to show cause on the child support. Until a new court order is in place, you each share transportation costs.
FOC filed a motion to show cause. He didn't show up, therefore the bench warrant.

I don't want to rely on the prior order; dad refuses to agree with what I have proposed, and wants to follow the prior order.

I plan on following the current order until there is a new one. Our current order does not state that we share transportation costs, but that whoever's parenting time is starting is to pick her up from school or the other parent's home.

I cannot file for a new order until I have an address to serve him at.
 
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anisaerah

Member
You send her and file in court to modify the current parenting schedule. You don't get to state that the prior order stated he had to pay all transportation (and you want to abide by that) but he has to go to court to get the prior parenting schedule for when he lived out of state.
Well, I certainly cannot afford cross country airfare, being that I have a below average income and am the only one supporting our daughter.

There is currently no court order that states that we must equally share the costs of long distance transportation, (or any transportation) but if he arrives to pick her up for his parenting time, I plan on following the court order.

If he wants to buy her a round trip plane ticket for his parenting time, I would be willing to take her to the airport.

How is this unreasonable? I'm willing to go above and beyond what I am court ordered to do.

It's not as if I can file to change the parenting plan without an address to serve him at.

It would have been nice if he had informed me ahead of time; perhaps then we could have agreed on something to present to the court before his move.
 
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Ohiogal

Queen Bee
Well, I certainly cannot afford cross country airfare, being that I have a below average income and am the only one supporting our daughter.

There is currently no court order that states that we must equally share the costs of long distance transportation, (or any transportation) but if he arrives to pick her up for his parenting time, I plan on following the court order.

If he wants to buy her a round trip plane ticket for his parenting time, I would be willing to take her to the airport.

How is this unreasonable? I'm willing to go above and beyond what I am court ordered to do.

It's not as if I can file to change the parenting plan without an address to serve him at.

It would have been nice if he had informed me ahead of time; perhaps then we could have agreed on something to present to the court before his move.
Read slowly. Because my typing speed doesn't matter. YOU ARE TO PICK HER UP AT DAD'S HOUSE. Which means you are responsible for the transportation from dad's house to yours UNTIL the court order is changed. If dad sends you a plane ticket, take her to the airport and send him a plan ticket for the trip back and he will do the same. Until the court orders something different.

If you had a brain and were using it, YOU WOULD IMMEDIATELY be filing to modify the current visitation and transportation. You could ask dad his current address.
 
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anisaerah

Member
Read slowly. Because my typing speed doesn't matter. YOU ARE TO PICK HER UP AT DAD'S HOUSE. Which means you are responsible for the transportation from dad's house to yours UNTIL the court order is changed. If dad sends you a plane ticket, take her to the airport and send him a plan ticket for the trip back and he will do the same. Until the court orders something different.

If you had a brain and were using it, YOU WOULD IMMEDIATELY be filing to modify the current visitation and transportation. You could ask dad his current address.
How can I pick her up from dad's house if he never arrives to pick her up for his parenting time, and instead sends a plane ticket, insisting that his parenting time is at a time when it's not court ordered?

I am not willing to purchase plane tickets unless a court says that I have to.

Dad does not have a current address, he's currently on the road somewhere between Chicago and Oregon.
 
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LdiJ

Senior Member
have you read her first post? She changed her story throughout this thread and has decided by dad moving he is abandoning the child. No one hung her, drew or quartered her.
Well...either the OP is at least somewhat as you describe her, OR the OP is an extremely poor communicator. I personally think that it is a mixture of both.

However, Pro told the truth. There is nothing legally wrong with following the court order. One cannot be held in contempt for following the court order.
 
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anisaerah

Member
Well...either the OP is at least somewhat as you describe her, OR the OP is an extremely poor communicator. I personally think that it is a mixture of both.

However, Pro told the truth. There is nothing legally wrong with following the court order. One cannot be held in contempt for following the court order.
funny, earlier I was told that I would lose custody for following our current court order.

I know I should have posted this to my thread from years ago, but I'm having a hard time seeing why sticking to the current order because I have no way of filing to change it makes me a bad parent, or a poor communicator.
 
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LdiJ

Senior Member
funny, earlier I was told that I would lose custody for following our current court order.

I know I should have posted this to my thread from years ago, but I'm having a hard time seeing why sticking to the current order because I have no way of filing to change it makes me a witch, a bad parent, or a poor communicator.
Actually I was saying that you were doing a poor job of communicating on this thread.

It is totally and completely fair for you to insist that he provide a round trip ticket. He is creating the distance therefore he should be responsible for providing the transportation for visitation. In addition, you are under no obligation to give him any time that he isn't already scheduled to receive.

However, isn't this really a moot point right now? You are saying that he is driving out there with no job and no home. Its likely to be quite some time before he could provide even a one-way ticket, let alone a round trip one.

I do agree however that you were being a bit witchy about the phone calls. Your daughter is 13. What possible harm is there in handing her the phone if her father calls her? I think that is the part that really got people going.
 
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