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  1. #1
    swidnica is offline Junior Member
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    The mother of my child wants to move .

    Me and a girl had a kid but we never went through the courts for child support and custody , basically because we were never married / divorced . She is the custodial parent since my daughter lives with her and i see my daughter once a week and whenever the mother wants me to take her but now she wants to move from Michigan to Texas . She wants to move with her boyfriend and she wants to get away from her problems up here . She would be taking her from me and all her family from both sides of the parents . Do I have a say in this ?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
  2. #2
    Antigone* is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by swidnica View Post
    Me and a girl had a kid but we never went through the courts for child support and custody , basically because we were never married / divorced . She is the custodial parent since my daughter lives with her and i see my daughter once a week and whenever the mother wants me to take her but now she wants to move from Michigan to Texas . She wants to move with her boyfriend and she wants to get away from her problems up here . She would be taking her from me and all her family from both sides of the parents . Do I have a say in this ?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
    Unless you have been legally declared the father of this child (and from your post it appears that you have not been), Mom is the only parent. She can do whatever she feels like doing.

    If you want to be in this child's life, you should establish paternity, visitation and support.
  3. #3
    swidnica is offline Junior Member
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    I have signed the birth certificate and signed a paternity petition . And I pay child support through our own agreement , not the governments . If she moves 1400 miles away there wont be much visitation and i would be paying to support my child that i won't get to see .
  4. #4
    Antigone* is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by swidnica View Post
    I have signed the birth certificate and signed a paternity petition . And I pay child support through our own agreement , not the governments . If she moves 1400 miles away there wont be much visitation and i would be paying to support my child that i won't get to see .
    Then you must petition the court to not allow her to move. I might also suggest that you get formal visitation and support in order. It benefits all parties involved.

    Just one other thing. Support is not a ticket to see your child, you know that right?
  5. #5
    Zigner is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by swidnica View Post
    I have signed the birth certificate and signed a paternity petition . And I pay child support through our own agreement , not the governments . If she moves 1400 miles away there wont be much visitation and i would be paying to support my child that i won't get to see .
    If you do not do this properly, then mom WILL be able to take the child. If you do this properly through the courts, you may be able to prevent that or, at least, have HER shoulder the costs for your visits.
  6. #6
    CJane is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Antigone*of*Greece View Post
    Then you must petition the court to not allow her to move. I might also suggest that you get formal visitation and support in order. It benefits all parties involved.

    Just one other thing. Support is not a ticket to see your child, you know that right?
    Actually, it's POSSIBLE that you'd need to petition the court for formal visitation/custody and support AND THEN (or as a part of that) attempt to prevent her relocation.

    Also, you must consider that the only way the court will tell her she can't relocate is if you are a viable choice as primary custodian. Because the way it generally works is "Mom can move. It's her right to move about freely and the court will not interfere with that. However, the state has been asked to intervene in the CHILD'S life, and we CAN restrict THAT. So, MOM can move. The CHILD cannot. IF MOM chooses to move, the CHILD stays with DAD."

    The court will NOT refuse Mom's relocation and make HER stay in MI.

    So, how viable are you as a primary custodian?
    How many overnights, on average do you have with the child?
    Do you have daycare available?
    Do you work a schedule that reasonably allows you to care for a child of this age?
    Do you have adequate resources to care for the child even if Mom never pays a single dime of child support?
    Do you think it's in the child's best interests to live with you and have the other parent visit only occasionally?
  7. #7
    swidnica is offline Junior Member
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    The mom won't let me take her overnight . Me and my girlfriend live together and the mom has never even met my girlfriend and refuses to bring our daughter around my girlfriend . So i'm not going to tell the person i'm living with to go stay somewhere else , but then again the mom wants to move out with her boyfriend , which i have no problem with because even though both of us have a kid to raise , we both have our separate lives and if both of us aren't a good fit , someone out there is a good fit to both of us .


    And as becoming a primary parent , I have a high paying career that has it's own daycare . I have a clean criminal record and am planning on taking parenting classes . The mother is 20 years old and has trouble graduating high school and has been in jail and has been on probation a couple times .
  8. #8
    Proserpina is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by swidnica View Post
    The mom won't let me take her overnight . Me and my girlfriend live together and the mom has never even met my girlfriend and refuses to bring our daughter around my girlfriend . So i'm not going to tell the person i'm living with to go stay somewhere else , but then again the mom wants to move out with her boyfriend , which i have no problem with because even though both of us have a kid to raise , we both have our separate lives and if both of us aren't a good fit , someone out there is a good fit to both of us .

    And as becoming a primary parent , I have a high paying career that has it's own daycare . I have a clean criminal record and am planning on taking parenting classes . The mother is 20 years old and has trouble graduating high school and has been in jail and has been on probation a couple times .


    But you decided she was perfectly fit to be Mommy. The court will agree with your choice. And believe me, your earnings will not affect a single thing.
  9. #9
    PQN
    PQN is offline Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Proserpina View Post
    And believe me, your earnings will not affect a single thing.
    Except child support


    OP - you need to go to court and establish paternity/visitation/support and file to block mom's move. It doesn't matter what she wants. Once a judge has ordered your visitation mom cannot decide where you go and who you are with on your visits. If you file to block mom's move and the judge orders the child to stay, are you willing to have the child live with you? If not then instead of filing to stop the move, file for a long distance parenting plan with mom paying for all visits.

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