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My "ex" took the kids out of state without permission

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jimrhonda

Junior Member
What is the name of your state?Wisconsin

March of 2004 my "ex" took the kids to Texas, said it was only going to be for a month, called at the end of that month and said they weren't coming back. Now, I am trying to get my kids for the summer, and she is making up excuses why they can't come. Nothing ever went to the courts stating that she could stay/move the kids out of state in the first place. I've made arrangments for my father to pick them up from her(he lives closer), then I will get them from him. She said she will not allow him to pick up the kids, even though the kids want to see him and are very excited. Can she do that?
She also said that I need to bring them back to Texas, if I don't take them back can I be prosecuted? Like I said she doesn't legally have the right to have them out of state in the first place. I've talked/written the Family Court Commissioner, The Family Court Judge, and the Gaurdian at Litem, none of them are doing anything to bring my kids back to Wisconsin or prosecuting her for being in contempt of court! I have sent all the fees that were needed to be sent, and have jump through all thier hoops...still NO ONE DOES SQUAT! How can I get my kids back to the state without a long drawn out, costly court hearing. Exspecially when my "ex" is being so uncooperative.
In summery, she took my kids out of the state without my or the courts permission, she took almost everything we owned, left me with all the bills, kept our house after the seperation then quit making the house payments(thinking part of reason she skipped state) leaving over $6,000 owed, has had a child from her boyfriend leaving me responsible because we're still leagally married, even though I've sent money for a paternity test to be done she won't pay her half nor have it done-which we can not be divorced until paternity is proven, she has taken my money for court costs, travel costs for the kids to come see me, but hasn't followed through with her end of what needs to be done.
HELP!
I don't know what else to do, and I can't afford high legal costs!

The initial divorce petition states the we have joint custody, and she has primary placement with my visitation being every Tuesday and Thursday from 3:30pm-7:00pm, and every other weekend. It also states that she cannot take the kids out of state for more than 30 days, and that she cannot move more than 150 miles away from me.
 
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LdiJ

Senior Member
jimrhonda said:
What is the name of your state?Wisconsin

March of 2004 my "ex" took the kids to Texas, said it was only going to be for a month, called at the end of that month and said they weren't coming back. Now, I am trying to get my kids for the summer, and she is making up excuses why they can't come. Nothing ever went to the courts stating that she could stay/move the kids out of state in the first place. I've made arrangments for my father to pick them up from her(he lives closer), then I will get them from him. She said she will not allow him to pick up the kids, even though the kids want to see him and are very excited. Can she do that? Like I said she doesn't legally have the right to have them out of state in the first place. I've talked/written the Family Court Commissioner, The Family Court Judge, and the Gaurdian at Litem, none of them are doing anything to bring my kids back to Wisconsin or prosecuting her for being in contempt of court! I have sent all the fees that were needed to be sent, and have jump through all thier hoops...still NO ONE DOES SQUAT! How can I get my kids back to the state without a long drawn out, costly court hearing. Exspecially when my "ex" is being so uncooperative.
In summery, she took my kids out of the state without my or the courts permission, she took almost everything we owned, left me with all the bills, kept our house after the seperation then quit making the house payments(thinking part of reason she skipped state) leaving over $6,000 owed, has taken my money for court costs, travel costs for the kids to come see me, but hasn't followed through with her end of what needs to be done.
HELP!
I don't know what else to do, and I can't afford high legal costs!

There is some really important information missing.

Were there court orders for custody?
What exactly did those court orders say? Did they say anything about relocation?
When did you file to ask that she be required to return the children to WI?
Are there orders for visitation? What do they say?

You need to let us understand where things stand legally and the timeline.

She and the kids have been in TX for a year and three months....it would be quite unusual for a judge to order her to return the children to WI after that much time.
 

rmet4nzkx

Senior Member
You need an attorney.
If she will let you pick up the children, then go pick the children up, don't send anyone else to pick them up for you. Now is not the itme to save money. Pay for the paternity test and get it over with.
 

jimrhonda

Junior Member
stealth2 said:
Are there any custody/visitation orders?
Yes, the initial petition for divorce states that I am to have the kids every Tuesday and Thursday from 3:30pm-7:00pm, and every other weekend. It also states the she is to not leave the State for more than 30 days, and that she can not move them more than 150 miles away.
 

jimrhonda

Junior Member
rmet4nzkx said:
You need an attorney.
If she will let you pick up the children, then go pick the children up, don't send anyone else to pick them up for you. Now is not the itme to save money. Pay for the paternity test and get it over with.
SERIOUSLY CAN'T AFFORD AN ATTORNEY! Checked into getting one and the minimum retainer fee is $5,000....Because of the her vacating the house and not making the payments the house went into forclosure and now my credit is shot, so I can't even get a loan to pay for an attorney. I have paid for half of the paternity test and she is suppose to pay for the other half.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
jimrhonda said:
Yes, the initial petition for divorce states that I am to have the kids every Tuesday and Thursday from 3:30pm-7:00pm, and every other weekend. It also states the she is to not leave the State for more than 30 days, and that she can not move them more than 150 miles away.
You state "initial petition for Divorce"...did that petition translate into court orders, signed off on by the judge? Or was this something that the two of you agreed upon but was never formally made into an order?

You really need an attorney...I don't know when you first took action...but I do know that the fact that they have now lived in TX for a year and three months is going to make it tough to force her to return them to WI.
 

jimrhonda

Junior Member
LdiJ said:
There is some really important information missing.

Were there court orders for custody?
What exactly did those court orders say? Did they say anything about relocation?
When did you file to ask that she be required to return the children to WI?
Are there orders for visitation? What do they say?

You need to let us understand where things stand legally and the timeline.

She and the kids have been in TX for a year and three months....it would be quite unusual for a judge to order her to return the children to WI after that much time.
Yes, the initial petition for divorce says the I am to have the children every Tuesday and Thursday from 3:30pm-7:00pm, and every other weekend. It also states that she is not to take the children out of state for more than 30 days, and can not move more than 150 miles away. We have joint custody, but she has primary placement. Is I do go pick up the kids from her, and she doesn't come get them, or I refuse to let her pick them up can I be prosecuted?
 

jimrhonda

Junior Member
stealth2 said:
Are there any custody/visitation orders?
Yes, we have joint custody with her having primary placement. However, my visitation orders are every Tuesday and Thursday from 3:30pm-7:00pm and every other weekend. Court order states she is to not take the kids out of state for more than 30 days, and is to not move more than 150 miles away.
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
When was the order made effective wrt her move, and what have you done to enforce your visitation?
 

rmet4nzkx

Senior Member
If you pick them up and return them to WI immediatly file in the court tor full custody and make reference to all the previous contempt filings etc, which should be considered even though the children have been out of WI for 15 months. Do as ordered by the court.
 

jimrhonda

Junior Member
LdiJ said:
You state "initial petition for Divorce"...did that petition translate into court orders, signed off on by the judge? Or was this something that the two of you agreed upon but was never formally made into an order?

You really need an attorney...I don't know when you first took action...but I do know that the fact that they have now lived in TX for a year and three months is going to make it tough to force her to return them to WI.
Yes, the petition was signed by the judge, and is in legal standing, however, nothing was submitted to the courts by her to take/move the children out of the state of Wisconsin. The petition for divorce was signed in October of 2003, this is the document that was signed by the judge and states all the custody and visitation guidelines. I've tried numerous times previous to this to try to bring them back, and I keep getting this run around. She's in contempt of court! Isn't that enough to at least have her tried in court? I know I need an attorney but I CAN'T afford one. The minimum retainer fee is $5,000 and I just don't have it! Because she quit making the house payments ($6,000 worth) the house went into forclosure and my credit is shot! So a loan is out of the question too.
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
Can you document her refusal of visitation as outlined in the order? You can file for contempt w/o an attorney.
 

jimrhonda

Junior Member
stealth2 said:
When was the order made effective wrt her move, and what have you done to enforce your visitation?

The order was made effective October of 2003, and I have written numerous letters to the family court commissioner requesting that she be made to come back to the state of wisconsin, and/or be charged with contempt of court for not complying with the court order of visitation. However, the family court commissioners office just tells me to get a lawyer, which I can't afford, and that the guardian at litem is in charge of the best interest of the children, and to work with her. Again, however, I have called her numerous times but she doesn't return my phone calls.
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
Writing to people isn't going to do squat. You need to file against her in court for contempt - and you can do that w/o an attorney.
 

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