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Non Custodial Parent Relocation

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dtre82

Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? California. I am the father, and the non custodial parent of a fifteen month old. Since the baby has been born I have been apart of her life and provided a majority of her needs. I am currently paying child support. The mother and I do not have any current child custody order in place. When I was working, I would have the baby every weekend. Once I became unemployed, I would have my daughter usually five days at a time every other week. Sometime back I met a woman, and we decided tjsy we would like to move to Las Vegas Nevada. Here, my fiancee will be starting her parents business back up again and I will be looking for work as well as a house. The prices for homes are much friendlier then Stockton or Modesto. I have tried many times to try and work out a parenting plan with the mother of my child. And to no avail. In efforts to keep our daughter from being able to leave the state and even the county, the mother of my child filed for custody. She specifically stated in the declaration portion, that she did not want our daughter to leave either of our counties, due to if any emergency were to happen. And she stayed that she is asking for this in fear that I am going to take our daughter to las Vegas Nevada. Now, I would've filed for custody first, but I was under the impression that we would. r able to work this out. And apparently not. I understand I am moving hours away. But my daughter is my life. I am willing to do whatever it takes to make sure I.have a relationship with her. I wanted a one month on one month off schedule originally. But I am considerate and know my daughter needs her mother. Well my question is,.will I be able to.move now and still be able to pick up my daughter ? Or will I be forced to stay here and not take.her out of the county?
 


Proserpina

Senior Member
Start looking at regular long-distance NCP parenting plans. You will eventually be allowed to take kiddo to wherever you're living, unless Mom can articulate some pretty strong reasons why that shouldn't happen.

You should also expect to be paying for all transportation costs.

(For what it's worth, a 50/50 timeshare is not likely at all)
 

dtre82

Junior Member
I definitely have no problem with paying transportation costs and even paying the mother gas.money for driving to stockton airport from modesto(30 minutes drive) to pick up and drop off the baby from and to me.
 

Proserpina

Senior Member
I definitely have no problem with paying transportation costs and even paying the mother gas.money for driving to stockton airport from modesto(30 minutes drive) to pick up and drop off the baby from and to me.


Someone will be flying with the child until the child can travel UM.
 

dtre82

Junior Member
Yes that will be me. Until she's thirty lol. If 50/50 isn't likely, what do you think would be granted? While she's a baby and not in school yet.
 

Proserpina

Senior Member
Yes that will be me. Until she's thirty lol. If 50/50 isn't likely, what do you think would be granted? While she's a baby and not in school yet.


Again, start looking at the standard NCP visitation schedules where distance is involved.

A bit of googling will help you :)
 

MichaCA

Senior Member
In addition to given practical/legal advice;

You will NOT be able to maintain the same relationship with your daughter if you move. Try checking out Barry Brazelton/Stanley Greenspan's book "The Irreducible Needs of Children". And other books that focus more specifically on the development/needs of toddlers/young children. I think it may help your future co-parenting relationship.

A 15 month old (although she will be older by the time a judgement is made) does not have 'object constancy'. It was explained to me as...the very young child has not developed to being able to retain a picture of their parent when that parent leaves. The parent is either there - or not there,in an absolute way. The best visitation for young one's is "frequent and continuing contact". With long-distance via plane trip...the bonding will be drastically altered...at least for a few years IMO.
 

CJane

Senior Member
Dad, there is no way you are ever going to get a month on/month off schedule w/kiddo. By choosing to move away (and I know it might not FEEL like a choice), you're choosing to seriously limit your daily influence on your child's life.

You need to be thinking more along the lines of one long weekend/month. Alternating holidays. Eventually, longer periods (maybe even alternating 2 wk periods) in the summers. Phone contact, skype contact. Visits when you're in her area. That sort of thing.

Also, should Mom choose to relocate - pretty much anywhere - in the future? It's a slam dunk for her. You need to consider that as well.
 

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