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Not being allowed custody; what can I do?

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BigBang21

Junior Member
Personally, I thought mom was being agreeable by wanting to SHARE the holiday since the court order leaves spring break as silent.

But my court order has it ruled where I get one year and their dad gets the next.

Now, the court order says it's your weekend. And if you are not willing to share the day, your option would be to take mom to court for contempt and get that court order more cut out to address school issues and other school holidays.
I don't have a problem with sharing the holiday, just not at 2pm. She didn't want to hear it. 2pm or nothing. My opposition to that time is we will go to church at noon.. I won't get home until 1pm. That would leave me 20-30 minutes to actually try to squeeze some stuff in before I had to leave to drop them off.
 


LdiJ

Senior Member
I got this order from the Office of the Attorney General at the same time I signed up for child support. At that time we were still living together and things weren't terribly bad. The only reason we had signed up for this/child support to begin with is because we needed the child care help and CCS here requires all unmarried parents to open a child support case to be eligible for child care support.

So, I've had the order since 2011. Last year, when we weren't together anymore we worked with each other for the most part. We shared the holidays.

"It is ordered that the parents may have possession of the child at any and all times mutually agreed to in advance and, in the absence of mutual agreement, it is order that they shall have possession of the child as follows:" and then it lists the specifics times, which I've already listed the relevant ones in this case.

This year, we can't even hardly talk to each other anymore and have just been following what the order says. So neither of us had followed this order before this year.
Is this the first/only problem you have had with following the orders so far? You can certainly, and should, take her to court for contempt if she is not following the orders, however its likely that she will only get a slap on the wrist for a first time contempt. However, I also think that since Easter is apparently a holiday that matters to both of you, its likely that you should also file to modify the orders to include sharing that holiday as well as the other's outlined in your order.

Its also possible that you should think ahead and consider other holidays that are not outlined in your current orders. What other holiday might you end up fighting over?
 

Isis1

Senior Member
I don't have a problem with sharing the holiday, just not at 2pm. She didn't want to hear it. 2pm or nothing. My opposition to that time is we will go to church at noon.. I won't get home until 1pm. That would leave me 20-30 minutes to actually try to squeeze some stuff in before I had to leave to drop them off.
Or have an Easter egg hunt BEFORE church? Or do it Saturday night even!! They get TWO days of Easter!!

You have got to start thinking out of the box. Or this is going to be a long 15 years.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
I got this order from the Office of the Attorney General at the same time I signed up for child support. At that time we were still living together and things weren't terribly bad. The only reason we had signed up for this/child support to begin with is because we needed the child care help and CCS here requires all unmarried parents to open a child support case to be eligible for child care support.

So, I've had the order since 2011. Last year, when we weren't together anymore we worked with each other for the most part. We shared the holidays.

"It is ordered that the parents may have possession of the child at any and all times mutually agreed to in advance and, in the absence of mutual agreement, it is order that they shall have possession of the child as follows:" and then it lists the specifics times, which I've already listed the relevant ones in this case.

This year, we can't even hardly talk to each other anymore and have just been following what the order says. So neither of us had followed this order before this year.
So basically you shared it last year so that begs the question was Easter on MOM's weekend last year? While you don't have to agree, if you took some of mom's time last year, the morally right thing to do would be share it this year for the sake of the children. However legally you don't have to do so.
 

BigBang21

Junior Member
So basically you shared it last year so that begs the question was Easter on MOM's weekend last year? While you don't have to agree, if you took some of mom's time last year, the morally right thing to do would be share it this year for the sake of the children. However legally you don't have to do so.
I wasn't sure, but I just looked it up and it was March 31st last year which was the 5th weekend of the month.. which was also my weekend.
 

mommyanme

Member
I wasn't sure, but I just looked it up and it was March 31st last year which was the 5th weekend of the month.. which was also my weekend.
I'm with others on this one, share the holiday. Instead of seeing it as squeezing things in on Sunday afternoon, make it a weekend long Easter. Pick them up Thursday and wake up early Friday for an Easter Egg hunt and BIG breakfast. Offer Mom to join in on the Egg Hunt in a neutral place, IF it would calm the waters. Saturday have Easter Dinner and Sunday let them enjoy it with you and then Mom. Like Isis said, think outside the box. Sharing kids is just that when you don't live together. Come on Dad we know you can do this :p
 

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