Out of state vacation

[CaliMama]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Nevada


I live in Nevada. My daughter is 11 years old, her father (California) and I have shared joint legal and physical custody since August of 2010 but she resides with me. He has visitation every 2nd weekend of the month and holiday visitation in the even years. I asked him back in Feb. if I could take my daughter on vacation to Florida June 10th-19th even though it would be his visitation weekend, he agreed, I sent him our itinerary through email but never had anything notarized that I had his permission because I didn't think we would have an issue like this (my mistake). Now, 2 days before we are supposed to go he is telling her he doesn't want her going. I have tried contacting him to make other arrangements to pick her up on friday before I leave if he won't allow her to go and he has failed to respond. His visitation hasn't been consistent since the order has been in place so I am afraid if I leave her with a friend until he picks her up that he will not show up. I contacted the police department here and they said that he could file a missing person report and I could be arrested if I just took her without his permission. It's too late for me to file anything with the court so my question is what am I to do if I can't get in contact with him in order to have anything notarized or have arrangements made to pick her up? Can I get in trouble for taking her even though I have attempted to make contact with him?

 

[randolph76]

What does your order state regarding out of state vacations (minus names)? There's a difference between permission to go on vacation and simply having to inform him.

 

[CaliMama]

The court order doesn't state anything about out of state vacation. It simply states only the 2nd weekend visitation, holiday visitation and summer break he gets 2 weeks with a 30 day advance notice.

 

[kim68]

It is not kidnapping if you take your child on a vacation. People deal with this every day. You can offer him a make up weekend and that would likely be approved via court. He could file a violation in court but I highly doubt it will hold much water over one weekend visitation that has been planned and approved for so long by him. Contact the attorney you had for this case and run it by them just to cover your a**.

 

[CaliMama]

Thanks kim68- is that still the case even though it was only a verbal agreement that she could go?? I have proof that I emailed the itinerary on Feb. 11th but I only have 2 days before the trip so I can't take it to court to get permission before I leave and we didn't have an attorney present on the case.

 

[Silverplum]

Thanks kim68- is that still the case even though it was only a verbal agreement that she could go?? I have proof that I emailed the itinerary on Feb. 11th but I only have 2 days before the trip so I can't take it to court to get permission before I leave and we didn't have an attorney present on the case.

Consider yourself warned: kim is a new poster who thinks she knows much. She's been wrong many times already. I'd advise you to take advice from a member who knows what s/he is talking about.

 

[CaliMama]

Oh ok, thanks Silverplum. Do you have any advice?? I am not trying to violate the order and take her without his permission on his weekend but he is not responding to me and I am afraid to just go anyway and him have me arrested or something.

 

[kim68]

I know what I have experienced in court and I know the results of court cases I was involved with while working for an attorney. I by no means know everything and I stated that I am only aware in NY state!! So do tell what I have been wrong about! There are many of you here who assume the worst about people and attack them for asking legitimate questions. It scares me to think that some of those very people represent children in court. <shudders>

Consider yourself warned: kim is a new poster who thinks she knows much. She's been wrong many times already. I'd advise you to take advice from a member who knows what s/he is talking about.

 

[TheGeekess]

Oh ok, thanks Silverplum. Do you have any advice?? I am not trying to violate the order and take her without his permission on his weekend but he is not responding to me and I am afraid to just go anyway and him have me arrested or something.

You can't be arrested for taking your daughter out of state for vacation.

There is a 2 week vacation time mentioned for the NCP in your orders, but none for yourself?

ETA: Scratch the above question.

Answer this one:

Did you offer Dad makeup time for June?

 

[TheGeekess]

I know what I have experienced in court and I know the results of court cases I was involved with while working for an attorney. I by no means know everything and I stated that I am only aware in NY state!! So do tell what I have been wrong about! There are many of you here who assume the worst about people and attack them for asking legitimate questions. It scares me to think that some of those very people represent children in court. <shudders>

Then stop posting to threads pertaining to other states. That's your mistake.

 

[gr8rn]

He didn't say anything directly to you, correct? He told your daughter that he didn't want her to go. Is that right?

And how did he agree initially? Was it verbal, or by email?

 

[CaliMama]

TheGeekess- yes I did offer him the weekend after we come back from Florida and he verbally agreed to that.

gr8rn- yes, everything was stated to my daughter about not going, not me. And the initial agreement was verbal. He asked that I send the itinerary by email and I did back in Feb.

 

[Isis1]

TheGeekess- yes I did offer him the weekend after we come back from Florida and he verbally agreed to that.

gr8rn- yes, everything was stated to my daughter about not going, not me. And the initial agreement was verbal. He asked that I send the itinerary by email and I did back in Feb.

if dad hasn't said anything to you, carry on. if dad shows, he cannot file a missing person's report because the daughter isn't missing. he cannot file for kidnapping, because you didn't kidnap her. the police won't arrest you. they will tell him it's a civil matter and not their call. he can take you to court for contempt, but if you offered him the weekend after for make up, it's not a willful intent of contempt.

 

[>Charlotte<]

I by no means know everything and I stated that I am only aware in NY state!!

The law is state-specific. What you know about the law in NY does not help somebody in Nevada.

A lot of people who post here say they "heard" they could blah blah blah because somebody told them blah blah blah. That ignorance is tough to overcome when the contradicting facts aren't what they want to hear. So it takes several posts just do undo that ignorance before they can even begin to get real help.

Your misinformation can easily send CaliMama off on a wild goose chase that will cause her to waste a lot of time. Please don't give legal advice unless you can give accurate advice as it pertains to the specific facts of the poster's situation, including the applicable state laws. It's nice that you want to help, but you're really only causing more confusion for the OP.

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Nevada


I live in Nevada. My daughter is 11 years old, her father (California) and I have shared joint legal and physical custody since August of 2010 but she resides with me. He has visitation every 2nd weekend of the month and holiday visitation in the even years. I asked him back in Feb. if I could take my daughter on vacation to Florida June 10th-19th even though it would be his visitation weekend, he agreed, I sent him our itinerary through email but never had anything notarized that I had his permission because I didn't think we would have an issue like this (my mistake). Now, 2 days before we are supposed to go he is telling her he doesn't want her going. I have tried contacting him to make other arrangements to pick her up on friday before I leave if he won't allow her to go and he has failed to respond. His visitation hasn't been consistent since the order has been in place so I am afraid if I leave her with a friend until he picks her up that he will not show up. I contacted the police department here and they said that he could file a missing person report and I could be arrested if I just took her without his permission. It's too late for me to file anything with the court so my question is what am I to do if I can't get in contact with him in order to have anything notarized or have arrangements made to pick her up? Can I get in trouble for taking her even though I have attempted to make contact with him?

I have no idea why, but the policeman lied to you, or at least mispoke. You cannot be arrested for denying dad his visitation.

Now, as far as the vacation is concerned...I do think that you really messed up. Not only did you select a week that included his weekend but you selected father's day weekend as well. That was a bad move on your part.

Do you have ANYTHING at all (even if its just an email) showing that dad agreed to you taking the vacation for those dates?