Parental rights

[DoJo53]

i live in California and I messed around with my ex and almost a year later tells me I have a son she gave birth to and he is 3 months she also included and told me that I could give up my parents rights but it was going to be done the right way through court she's saying she wants no money from me, I am really lost and this is crazy because I didn't expect it and I do want to give my parental rights up as she's telling me then go to court but I'm skeptical how the process is , does this mean her dad or mother adopt the child? For me to give up my rights or is it better to not just go to court and leave as is unless something does come up

 

[Zigner]

i live in California and I messed around with my ex and almost a year later tells me I have a son she gave birth to and he is 3 months she also included and told me that I could give up my parents rights but it was going to be done the right way through court she's saying she wants no money from me, I am really lost and this is crazy because I didn't expect it and I do want to give my parental rights up as she's telling me then go to court but I'm skeptical how the process is , does this mean her dad or mother adopt the child? For me to give up my rights or is it better to not just go to court and leave as is unless something does come up

What do you WANT to do? That's the first question that needs to be asked.

If you want to pursue custody and/or visitation, and also step up with child support, then go here to read up: http://www.courts.ca.gov/selfhelp-family.htm

ETA:

Two more links...

http://www.courts.ca.gov/selfhelp-custody.htm
and
http://www.courts.ca.gov/selfhelp-support.htm

 

[CTU]

i live in California and I messed around with my ex and almost a year later tells me I have a son she gave birth to and he is 3 months she also included and told me that I could give up my parents rights but it was going to be done the right way through court she's saying she wants no money from me, I am really lost and this is crazy because I didn't expect it and I do want to give my parental rights up as she's telling me then go to court but I'm skeptical how the process is , does this mean her dad or mother adopt the child? For me to give up my rights or is it better to not just go to court and leave as is unless something does come up

And understand that giving up custody rights doesn't wipe out a child support obligation. You would however be able to file for visitation in the future.

If she thinks she can actually terminate your parental rights (as in, you have NO rights and you have no financial obligation - you essentially have no child), she's sorely mistaken unless she marries, and her husband wishes to adopt the child.

 

[Zigner]

And understand that giving up custody rights doesn't wipe out a child support obligation; you would be able to file for visitation at any point.

If she thinks she can actually terminate your parental rights (as in, you have NO rights and you have no financial obligation - you essentially have no child), she's sorely mistaken unless she marries, and her husband wishes to adopt the child.

...or she outright places the child for adoption.

 

[DoJo53]

I want to go with it to give up my rights , but yes that's another question I had , about child support she's telling me she didn't want my money etc..and I've read on here it doesn't depend on her on that though it depends if she applies for state help?

 

[DoJo53]

Another thing I forget to mention I still have to take a DNA test because I'm not sure it's even mines but she's saying I'll get papers for paternity , I'm just thinking ahead and just feeling lost

 

[Zigner]

I want to go with it to give up my rights , but yes that's another question I had , about child support she's telling me she didn't want my money etc..and I've read on here it doesn't depend on her on that though it depends if she applies for state help?

Wow, I had you pegged wrong. For some reason your tone seemed to me as the type of person who actually wanted to be a father for his child.

Any paper you sign is worth less than a square of Charmin TP. The only way your rights and responsibilities can be given up is if the child is adopted.

 

[Zigner]

Another thing I forget to mention I still have to take a DNA test because I'm not sure it's even mines but she's saying I'll get papers for paternity , I'm just thinking ahead and just feeling lost

Yes, you absolutely must have a DNA test before agreeing to anything in court. Legal paternity needs to be established through the courts.

 

[CTU]

I want to go with it to give up my rights , but yes that's another question I had , about child support she's telling me she didn't want my money etc..and I've read on here it doesn't depend on her on that though it depends if she applies for state help?

Then it's not going to happen, dear.

Mommy and you can decide that you never want to see the child, but she is absolutely free to file for child support against you ... whenever she likes.

 

[CTU]

Wow, I had you pegged wrong. For some reason your tone seemed to me as the type of person who actually wanted to be a father for his child.

Y'know, I was wondering why you were being so nice to him ...