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Parenting Plan Interpretation

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silverdew

Junior Member
Washington State

I would like some opinions on how to interpret my parenting plan. I am attending college and so is my ex-husband. He is in a different state than I am. We went to mediation and came up with our parenting plan. Since we knew he would be moving we added several things to the parenting plan after his move. The plan states "Beginning in August of 2016 as long as and when Father moves to (city), (child) will be with Father for one overnight through October 2016. At the beginning of October, Mother and Father will meet with mediator to discuss how overnights with (child) have been going prior to transitioning from one overnight to two overnights."

My ex-husband did not move in August. He moved a few weeks ago and has only had one overnight with our child. He is insisting that our child start staying at his house for two overnights in November. He has a meeting set up with our mediator to discuss how overnights have been going. But there's only been one. My interpretation is that he should have had overnights for all of August and September so that I could tell him how our young 2 year old child is handling the change. I told him that we will meet with the mediator in the middle of November. So now I'm getting threats of contempt and accused of keeping our child from him.

So my question is, what is your interpretation of the line "as long as and when Father . . . . . ." Since he didn't do what was required, does it cancel out the items listed in that paragraph?
 


LdiJ

Senior Member
Washington State

I would like some opinions on how to interpret my parenting plan. I am attending college and so is my ex-husband. He is in a different state than I am. We went to mediation and came up with our parenting plan. Since we knew he would be moving we added several things to the parenting plan after his move. The plan states "Beginning in August of 2016 as long as and when Father moves to (city), (child) will be with Father for one overnight through October 2016. At the beginning of October, Mother and Father will meet with mediator to discuss how overnights with (child) have been going prior to transitioning from one overnight to two overnights."

My ex-husband did not move in August. He moved a few weeks ago and has only had one overnight with our child. He is insisting that our child start staying at his house for two overnights in November. He has a meeting set up with our mediator to discuss how overnights have been going. But there's only been one. My interpretation is that he should have had overnights for all of August and September so that I could tell him how our young 2 year old child is handling the change. I told him that we will meet with the mediator in the middle of November. So now I'm getting threats of contempt and accused of keeping our child from him.

So my question is, what is your interpretation of the line "as long as and when Father . . . . . ." Since he didn't do what was required, does it cancel out the items listed in that paragraph?
When is his meeting set up with the mediator? Meeting with the mediator is not necessarily a bad thing, even if he has only had one or two overnights with the child. You can discuss with the mediator the fact that he did not move back when he said he was going to do so and therefore the child has not had enough one night overnights to truly see how its going.
 

not2cleverRed

Obvious Observer
Washington State

I would like some opinions on how to interpret my parenting plan. I am attending college and so is my ex-husband. He is in a different state than I am. We went to mediation and came up with our parenting plan. Since we knew he would be moving we added several things to the parenting plan after his move. The plan states "Beginning in August of 2016 as long as and when Father moves to (city), (child) will be with Father for one overnight through October 2016. At the beginning of October, Mother and Father will meet with mediator to discuss how overnights with (child) have been going prior to transitioning from one overnight to two overnights."

My ex-husband did not move in August. He moved a few weeks ago and has only had one overnight with our child. He is insisting that our child start staying at his house for two overnights in November. He has a meeting set up with our mediator to discuss how overnights have been going. But there's only been one. My interpretation is that he should have had overnights for all of August and September so that I could tell him how our young 2 year old child is handling the change. I told him that we will meet with the mediator in the middle of November. So now I'm getting threats of contempt and accused of keeping our child from him.

So my question is, what is your interpretation of the line "as long as and when Father . . . . . ." Since he didn't do what was required, does it cancel out the items listed in that paragraph?
Is there a typo in one of the bolded sentences?
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
Washington State

I would like some opinions on how to interpret my parenting plan. I am attending college and so is my ex-husband. He is in a different state than I am. We went to mediation and came up with our parenting plan. Since we knew he would be moving we added several things to the parenting plan after his move. The plan states "Beginning in August of 2016 as long as and when Father moves to (city), (child) will be with Father for one overnight through October 2016. At the beginning of October, Mother and Father will meet with mediator to discuss how overnights with (child) have been going prior to transitioning from one overnight to two overnights."

My ex-husband did not move in August. He moved a few weeks ago and has only had one overnight with our child. He is insisting that our child start staying at his house for two overnights in November. He has a meeting set up with our mediator to discuss how overnights have been going. But there's only been one. My interpretation is that he should have had overnights for all of August and September so that I could tell him how our young 2 year old child is handling the change. I told him that we will meet with the mediator in the middle of November. So now I'm getting threats of contempt and accused of keeping our child from him.

So my question is, what is your interpretation of the line "as long as and when Father . . . . . ." Since he didn't do what was required, does it cancel out the items listed in that paragraph?
If the bolded is actually what the plan states, Dad has done exactly what it gives him - one overnight through October. Or did you leave some words out?
 

CJane

Senior Member
What you posted indicates that dad should have one overnight between August and October. It then SEPARATELY says that you will BOTH meet with the mediator at the beginning of October.

And frankly, a 2 year old should be able to make the transition pretty easily.
 

silverdew

Junior Member
Is there a typo in one of the bolded sentences?
No. There is not a typo. The plan states that beginning in August, he can have (child) for 1 overnight on the weekends he has (child). So during the months of August through September, he should have had 4 overnights. But he didn't have his first overnight until the middle of September. So by the time he has 4 overnights, it will be the first week in November. After that we will go to our mediator and discuss how the overnights have been going. That was my thinking.
 

silverdew

Junior Member
If the bolded is actually what the plan states, Dad has done exactly what it gives him - one overnight through October. Or did you leave some words out?
There is a parentheses that I left out. It says ". . . . . as long as and when Father moves to (city), (child) will be with Father for one overnight (Saturday until Sunday) from August 2016 through October 15, 2016."
 

Silverplum

Senior Member
There is a parentheses that I left out. It says ". . . . . as long as and when Father moves to (city), (child) will be with Father for one overnight (Saturday until Sunday) from August 2016 through October 15, 2016."
If you want good advice, don't leave parts out of your story.

This time, the document still states the same thing, with or without the left-out part. Others have already explained the proper interpretation.
 

Silverplum

Senior Member
No. There is not a typo. The plan states that beginning in August, he can have (child) for 1 overnight on the weekends he has (child). So during the months of August through September, he should have had 4 overnights. But he didn't have his first overnight until the middle of September. So by the time he has 4 overnights, it will be the first week in November. After that we will go to our mediator and discuss how the overnights have been going. That was my thinking.
Your thinking is incorrect. Your meeting is to be October 1 or very shortly thereafter. Call today to get on the schedule: you've really left obeying this COURT ORDER to the last minute.
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
There is a parentheses that I left out. It says ". . . . . as long as and when Father moves to (city), (child) will be with Father for one overnight (Saturday until Sunday) from August 2016 through October 15, 2016."
Which still gives him one - and only one - overnight between August and mid-October. Just because you/your lawyer wrote a poorly worded plan does not allow you to change thw rules now.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
No. There is not a typo. The plan states that beginning in August, he can have (child) for 1 overnight on the weekends he has (child). So during the months of August through September, he should have had 4 overnights. But he didn't have his first overnight until the middle of September. So by the time he has 4 overnights, it will be the first week in November. After that we will go to our mediator and discuss how the overnights have been going. That was my thinking.
You are wrong. His overnights are contingent upon his moving to the same city. He did that. Hence he missed out on overnights he could have had if he moved sooner. You are to meet with the mediator in October. Not when YOU unilaterally decide but when the parenting plan states you should.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
Actually based upon what YOU have stated your plan says, dad is only entitled to ONE overnight total between August and October. it doesn't say one over night every other week or anything of that juncture.

long as and when Father moves to (city), (child) will be with Father for one overnight (Saturday until Sunday) from August 2016 through October 15, 2016."
So based on this wording -- this exact wording -- as long as dad has ONE overnight between August and October, he has fulfilled his duties. Not it is time for you to fulfill your obligations and meet with the mediator.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
No. There is not a typo. The plan states that beginning in August, he can have (child) for 1 overnight on the weekends he has (child). So during the months of August through September, he should have had 4 overnights. But he didn't have his first overnight until the middle of September. So by the time he has 4 overnights, it will be the first week in November. After that we will go to our mediator and discuss how the overnights have been going. That was my thinking.
While I initially thought that is what your plan meant (couldn't edit to correct for some reason) that is NOT what your plan states based upon what you have stated. It states ONE OVERNIGHT.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
I am circling right back to the fact that meeting with the mediator is NOT a bad thing at all. If the mediator agrees with you that dad needs a couple more weekends of just one overnight before going to two, the mediator will say so. Meeting with the mediator does not mean that dad will get his way, or you will get your way. It just means that you will be meeting with the mediator and the mediator will help you work out whatever is in the best interest of your child.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
I am circling right back to the fact that meeting with the mediator is NOT a bad thing at all. If the mediator agrees with you that dad needs a couple more weekends of just one overnight before going to two, the mediator will say so. Meeting with the mediator does not mean that dad will get his way, or you will get your way. It just means that you will be meeting with the mediator and the mediator will help you work out whatever is in the best interest of your child.
The mediator won't be making the decision at all though.
 

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