Paternity Testing in Texas

[Proserpina]

My parents assume at this point, that the DNA test will be cheaper then the Divorce. Right now I am weighing my options, and gathering information. We have a DNA center close to both of our locations, and I previously had the money to get the test done, but I wouldn't pay for it until he agreed to go to the appointment and he refused. That was the cheapest way I could find to do it, yet he refused. So now we are weighing our options. Also, I just moved 2 months ago. I tried to get the paternity testing by going the shorter route and filing for child support in both Illinois and Texas, but both states have managed to either lose my paperwork, or its gotten screwed up where they cannot do it because of me being on a caseload with my boyfriend for medicaid and foodstamps. Also, before me having a boyfriend while being married causes a commotion, yes I know it is adultery, but neither one of us can accuse the other because we both have children born after our separation to different people.

Why don't you do this instead:

Get a home paternity test done first. That will help you decide if it's worth going through the process of filing to disestablish paternity which can be a royal PITA. If he's Dad, it's simply a divorce action. Otherwise...

Ah...and who did you put on the birth certificate of the child/ren born after the separation?


(Am I getting the timing right here? You've had two kids in the past 2+ years with two different guys, all while you're still married?)

 

[Lovely Lotus]

Why don't you do this instead:

Get a home paternity test done first. That will help you decide if it's worth going through the process of filing to disestablish paternity which can be a royal PITA. If he's Dad, it's simply a divorce action. Otherwise...

Ah...and who did you put on the birth certificate of the child/ren born after the separation?


(Am I getting the timing right here? You've had two kids in the past 2+ years with two different guys, all while you're still married?)

Okay let me explain further. I had my daughter September of 09, while I was 17. Got married stupidly shortly after turning 18 in December 09. Was separated March of 11. I got into a relationship with someone else, as did he. Me and his girlfriend both became pregnant. Her first, then me about 2 weeks later unkowingly. Was it stupid? Yes. Do I regret it? Not in the slightest. I love my children, and I also hlep my boyfriend take care of his two children because there mother has vanished and cannot be found unless she contacts us.

I haven't done a home paternity test, because I wasn't aware I could do it state to state. If that is possible, I could go that route because my boyfriends dad knows him and can get him to take the test.

Also my daughter who was born after the separation has my boyfriends last name. I didn't know that my husbands name had to be on the birth certificate, until after she was born. Theres alot of other factors in this, that aren't particularly relevant, that Im trying to keep out because I don't want this to be a flame fest. I am truly just trying to get advice on the best possible course of action, not start a war. I hate forums for that reason.

 

[Proserpina]

Okay let me explain further. I had my daughter September of 09, while I was 17. Got married stupidly shortly after turning 18 in December 09. Was separated March of 11. I got into a relationship with someone else, as did he. Me and his girlfriend both became pregnant. Her first, then me about 2 weeks later unkowingly. Was it stupid? Yes. Do I regret it? Not in the slightest. I love my children, and I also hlep my boyfriend take care of his two children because there mother has vanished and cannot be found unless she contacts us.

I haven't done a home paternity test, because I wasn't aware I could do it state to state. If that is possible, I could go that route because my boyfriends dad knows him and can get him to take the test.

Also my daughter who was born after the separation has my boyfriends last name. I didn't know that my husbands name had to be on the birth certificate, until after she was born. Theres alot of other factors in this, that aren't particularly relevant, that Im trying to keep out because I don't want this to be a flame fest. I am truly just trying to get advice on the best possible course of action, not start a war. I hate forums for that reason.

The thing is - it matters.

You now have TWO children born of this marriage - not just one. Honestly, at this point, filing for divorce would probably be easier. Then either of you can challenge paternity as part of the divorce action.

Bear in mind that if the divorce is finalized and your husband's legal paternity has NOT been disestablished, generally that's it - end of the line. No gimmes, no mulligans, no do-overs - paternity would be considered adjudicated, likely permanently.

 

[stealth2]

And some parenting advice... Please consider using some sort of more reliable birth control until you have your life on track and are settled into a committed relationship.

 

[Lovely Lotus]

And some parenting advice... Please consider using some sort of more reliable birth control until you have your life on track and are settled into a committed relationship.

I am on birth control thank you. My life was on track. I had my own house, he had a stable job, we had our lives on track and were happy. But my boyfriend threw out his knee, and had to be laid off for a month, have knee surgery, then be laid off for another two months while it healed. I was 8-9 months pregnant at the time and couldn't work, so we had no choice but to move with my parents till we got on our feet. We are both looking for jobs currently. I was stupid and my first daughter was the best "accident" that ever happened to me. She saved my life in a way. My second daughter was completely planned, wanted, and was also needed because I had health problems that could only be taken care of when having my cesarean. So now I am on birth control, and don't want any more kids. I am having my tubes tied as soon as possible. Thanks.

 

[Lovely Lotus]

The thing is - it matters.

You now have TWO children born of this marriage - not just one. Honestly, at this point, filing for divorce would probably be easier. Then either of you can challenge paternity as part of the divorce action.

Bear in mind that if the divorce is finalized and your husband's legal paternity has NOT been disestablished, generally that's it - end of the line. No gimmes, no mulligans, no do-overs - paternity would be considered adjudicated, likely permanently.

I figured I would have to go the route of getting a divorce, but I was seeing if there was a simpler way to do it. He's just fighting it because of the circumstances of who we are both dating now.

 

[stealth2]

I am on birth control thank you. My life was on track. I had my own house, he had a stable job, we had our lives on track and were happy. But my boyfriend threw out his knee, and had to be laid off for a month, have knee surgery, then be laid off for another two months while it healed. I was 8-9 months pregnant at the time and couldn't work, so we had no choice but to move with my parents till we got on our feet. We are both looking for jobs currently. I was stupid and my first daughter was the best "accident" that ever happened to me. She saved my life in a way. My second daughter was completely planned, wanted, and was also needed because I had health problems that could only be taken care of when having my cesarean. So now I am on birth control, and don't want any more kids. I am having my tubes tied as soon as possible. Thanks.

Sweetheart. You're what - 19? With two kids, by two different men. Unmarried. Living with your parents. No OB/GYN is going to tie your tubes for quite a number of years.

 

[Isis1]

Sweetheart. You're what - 19? With two kids, by two different men. Unmarried. Living with your parents. No OB/GYN is going to tie your tubes for quite a number of years.

i strongly recommend the IUD. i'm fertile myrtle. worked very well for me.

 

[Lovely Lotus]

Sweetheart. You're what - 19? With two kids, by two different men. Unmarried. Living with your parents. No OB/GYN is going to tie your tubes for quite a number of years.

Yes Im 19, yes i have 2 kids, but I AM married to someone, just separated, and yes they will tie my tubes, if not a full hysterectomy because I have severe health issues that require surgery once a year atleast. I just have to wait a little bit longer because they are trying to determine how sever it is to weigh the risks. Ive already talked to my OB/GYN about it. Don't assume things, please. And I really dont see how this is relevant in the slightest.

 

[Proserpina]

I figured I would have to go the route of getting a divorce, but I was seeing if there was a simpler way to do it. He's just fighting it because of the circumstances of who we are both dating now.

Just go with the divorce. Your parents are willing to help - best get it all sorted out and over and done with once and for all.

 

[Lovely Lotus]

i strongly recommend the IUD. i'm fertile myrtle. worked very well for me.

Actually, I was on the IUD just before I got pregnant the second time. I had somethng go wrong with it though, and it caused an infection and they thought I had cervical cancer. Luckily, after a painful procedure, they discovered it was nothing and told me it was best not to use the IUD. Im on the Nuvaring now. I like it, but im having some issues with it.

 

[Lovely Lotus]

Just go with the divorce. Your parents are willing to help - best get it all sorted out and over and done with once and for all.

Yeah they are willing to help with the DNA test if its cheap, but the divorce is more pricey and they aren't so willing.

 

[Proserpina]

Yeah they are willing to help with the DNA test if its cheap, but the divorce is more pricey and they aren't so willing.

Hon, here's the thing.

You can get the paternity test done now, sure.

But that in and of itself is NOT going to disestablish your husband's legal paternity.

That's STILL going to have to happen.

And that's going to likely be a bit spendy unless you ALL agree to it (and this includes the biological father/s of both children).

Y'know?

 

[Lovely Lotus]

Hon, here's the thing.

You can get the paternity test done now, sure.

But that in and of itself is NOT going to disestablish your husband's legal paternity.

That's STILL going to have to happen.

And that's going to likely be a bit spendy unless you ALL agree to it (and this includes the biological father/s of both children).

Y'know?

Yeah I will just have to go that route. But what do you mean that both the childrens biological fathers have to agree?

 

[Proserpina]

Yeah I will just have to go that route. But what do you mean that both the childrens biological fathers have to agree?

Because the State wants a child to have two legal parents.

And the State is unlikely to disestablish legal paternity unless there is another "parent" willing to stand up and take the plate.

The biological father of your first child will likely have to be included in the proceedings.