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Pick up......late

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Halls

Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Texas

My court order says 6pm as pick up time on Fridays of dads weekend. He and I use to coparent better, but recently he made a decision that he wants to go by the court order perfectly. I said ok and have done my part faithfully.

The issue is my ex has step mom come pick up my son and the last two times she has been more then 15 minutes late. I've not received a phone call to let me know she would be late or anything else. The first time because she was late our plans were ruined as we couldn't get into an open concert my husband and I were going to.

What is a reasonable time to give ex to pick up son? I've been told 15 minutes is reasonable. I agree. After that ex is intruding on my time. What say anyone else?
 


CSO286

Senior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Texas

My court order says 6pm as pick up time on Fridays of dads weekend. He and I use to coparent better, but recently he made a decision that he wants to go by the court order perfectly. I said ok and have done my part faithfully.

The issue is my ex has step mom come pick up my son and the last two times she has been more then 15 minutes late. I've not received a phone call to let me know she would be late or anything else. The first time because she was late our plans were ruined as we couldn't get into an open concert my husband and I were going to.

What is a reasonable time to give ex to pick up son? I've been told 15 minutes is reasonable. I agree. After that ex is intruding on my time. What say anyone else?
I'd look at 1/2 hour or so without a phone call, and expect a call for anything beyond that.

Honestly--15 minutes isn't the end of the world. Traffic could have been bad, or any number of other reasons for being late.

Co-parenting also means being able to give a little.

*Eyebrow*
 

Halls

Member
Oh, I'd love to coparent and work with ex. He doesn't want to coparent anymore and has told me he wants to go by the court order to a tee. This is his decision and I'm trying to respect and hold him to it.

He says this but only means he wants me to follow the court order perfectly, not himself. If I don't have our son at the door at 6pm waiting when they show up stepmom will bang on my door and actually try to open it. So my son is at the door at 6 waiting with everything ready to go.
 

mistoffolees

Senior Member
Oh, I'd love to coparent and work with ex. He doesn't want to coparent anymore and has told me he wants to go by the court order to a tee. This is his decision and I'm trying to respect and hold him to it.
He's not the one getting worked up over 15 minutes.

You're being unreasonable.
 

Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Texas

My court order says 6pm as pick up time on Fridays of dads weekend. He and I use to coparent better, but recently he made a decision that he wants to go by the court order perfectly. I said ok and have done my part faithfully.

The issue is my ex has step mom come pick up my son and the last two times she has been more then 15 minutes late. I've not received a phone call to let me know she would be late or anything else. The first time because she was late our plans were ruined as we couldn't get into an open concert my husband and I were going to.

What is a reasonable time to give ex to pick up son? I've been told 15 minutes is reasonable. I agree. After that ex is intruding on my time. What say anyone else?
If there a maximum waiting time listed in the order? If not, then he IS following the order. By the same token, does the court order allow others to pick up the child?
 

Halls

Member
No, it says 6pm. My old lawyer told me it's 15 minutes considered reasonable by court.

I'm not being unreasonable as ive never left when they've been late. I'm simply asking.

And yes, the court order allows ex to have a qualified person to pick up in his place.
 

Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
No, it says 6pm. My old lawyer told me it's 15 minutes considered reasonable by court.

I'm not being unreasonable as ive never left when they've been late. I'm simply asking.

And yes, the court order allows ex to have a qualified person to pick up in his place.
I wouldn't in a million years consider 15 mins "reasonable." 30-60 mins, sure...not 15.
 

nextwife

Senior Member
And some of us consider it dangerous to fish out a phone and call while in traffic. Certainly, her not calling while perhaps negotiating through traffic while running a mere 15 minutes late is not that big a deal. I think it is ridiculous how some people expect one to instantly phone or text for every little thing. And running only 15 minutes late is a little thing..

Believe it or not many generations of CP and NCPs survived WITHOUT cel phones. I have many friends who don't carry one all the time.
 
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Isis1

Senior Member
And some of us consider it dangerous to fish out a phone and call while in traffic. Certainly, her not calling while perhaps negotiating through traffic while running a mere 15 minutes late is not that big a deal. I think it is ridiculous how some people expect one to instantly phone or text for every little thing. And running only 15 minutes late is a little thing..

Believe it or not many generations of CP and NCPs survived WITHOUT cel phones. I have many friends who don't carry one all the time.
i sure don't. i refuse to carry a cell phone. i don't like being tracked down every second of my day for a reason.
 

CJane

Senior Member
i sure don't. i refuse to carry a cell phone. i don't like being tracked down every second of my day for a reason.
You do realize, of course, that no one can 'track you down' with a cell phone? It IS possible to carry one, and simply not answer it or respond to texts/calls.

Mine is used far more often as a movie player/MP3 player/GPS than it is a phone.
 

TinkerBelleLuvr

Senior Member
If you are running that tight a schedule, why not have a competent adult wait at the house until they arrive? You aren't late for your event and child gets picked up.
 

Isis1

Senior Member
You do realize, of course, that no one can 'track you down' with a cell phone? It IS possible to carry one, and simply not answer it or respond to texts/calls.

Mine is used far more often as a movie player/MP3 player/GPS than it is a phone.
it only incites anger on those who get angry if i don't answer. the ex, the husband. driving is not an excuse for me not to answer my phone to either of them. even had the ex come at me, snatch my phone from my hand and break it into pieces because i refused to answer it. this was after we were no longer together. and yes, i made a police report.

no phone, no problem.
 

TheGeekess

Keeper of the Kraken
Just saying my papers say 45 minutes as a wait time.
And mine are silent on the wait time; however, as we are in ALABAMA and OP is in TEXAS, what our papers/courts say are not germane to this discussion.
 
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