Pregnant/unmarried. Can I move&deliver in other state w/out notice to paternal parent

[secretspecial]

Pregnant/unmarried. Can I move&deliver in other state w/out notice to paternal parent

What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state?Reside in California & want to move to Texas

The father of the baby & I are not together. We were never married and never lived together. I cannot afford to stay in CA with the additional expense of another child. I can comfortably afford to move out of state and raise my daughter. I want her to have a relationship w/her father, but am concerned about how moving out of state will affect us legally. Can he legally stop me? Can he, through the courts, force me and/or our daughter to come back to CA? I feel legal custody should be 50/50, but I want physical custody, and he can see her on an agreed schedule throughout the year.

He does not know I'm considering moving and I have decided not to tell him until after the move (within the next 5-6 months). I plan to relocate before I deliver this child. He will be furious and seek legal action. Will California or Texas have jurisdiction over the dispute, and what can I expect to happen, legally, as far as a custody dispute goes?

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state?Reside in California & want to move to Texas

The father of the baby & I are not together. We were never married and never lived together. I cannot afford to stay in CA with the additional expense of another child. I can comfortably afford to move out of state and raise my daughter. I want her to have a relationship w/her father, but am concerned about how moving out of state will affect us legally. Can he legally stop me? Can he, through the courts, force me and/or our daughter to come back to CA? I feel legal custody should be 50/50, but I want physical custody, and he can see her on an agreed schedule throughout the year.

He does not know I'm considering moving and I have decided not to tell him until after the move (within the next 5-6 months). I plan to relocate before I deliver this child. He will be furious and seek legal action. Will California or Texas have jurisdiction over the dispute, and what can I expect to happen, legally, as far as a custody dispute goes?

If you move before the child is born he cannot stop you (he can if you try to move after the child is born). The state where the child is born will have jurisdiction. He cannot force you or the child to return to CA, if the child is not born in CA.

Don't wait 5 or 6 months to move. Do it as soon as possible. It would be healthier for your pregnancy to move now.

 

[stealth2]

LDi - I have a feeling she may be talking about the father of a child already born, not the father of the one she's carrying.

OP - if you have another child, you must follow the state guidelines about moving the child outside of CA. You WILL have to notify the father a certain period of time prior to your move (I don't recall if it's 30 or 60 days) and he WILL have the right to contest the move. And the court DOES have the right to bar you from removing that child from the state. You can't simply up and go.

 

[Gracie3787]

If you move before the child is born he cannot stop you (he can if you try to move after the child is born). The state where the child is born will have jurisdiction. He cannot force you or the child to return to CA, if the child is not born in CA.

Don't wait 5 or 6 months to move. Do it as soon as possible. It would be healthier for your pregnancy to move now.

LdiJ,
I'm very shocked and saddened at your advice that OP move ASAP. Do you realize that the OP wants to move, WITHOUT telling the father, WITHOUT allowing the father to be a part of the pregnancy/birth and all that goes with it??? If a woman has an attitude like that, do you honestly believe that she'll tell the father once HIS baby is born?

I thought that you believed that fathers have rights also and that a child needs both parents, which is why I'm so shocked. Shame on you for not advising OP to tell father about move.
Gracie

 

[stealth2]

However, Gracie.... you do need to remember taht this is a LEGAL board, not a moral/ethical one. LEGALLY, the Mom has the right to move while pregnant w/o informing the father, etc. The place it gets sticky is if she has another child - that father DOES need to be informed, as does the court.

 

[LdiJ]

LdiJ,
I'm very shocked and saddened at your advice that OP move ASAP. Do you realize that the OP wants to move, WITHOUT telling the father, WITHOUT allowing the father to be a part of the pregnancy/birth and all that goes with it??? If a woman has an attitude like that, do you honestly believe that she'll tell the father once HIS baby is born?

I thought that you believed that fathers have rights also and that a child needs both parents, which is why I'm so shocked. Shame on you for not advising OP to tell father about move.
Gracie

Gracie, I understand the point that you are making. However, I do try to limit my advice to the legal aspects of things. This board sometimes loses focus of the legal aspects when it pertains to single moms. Plus, CA is a very expensive place to live and its tough to be a single parent there. Therefore I can definitely understand why someone wouldn't want to stay. On top of that CA has such tough move away laws...that if someone thinks they need to move to make it....then they better move before they give birth.

Its also wiser and healthier to handle something as stressful as a move early in a pregnancy.

 

[Gracie3787]

However, Gracie.... you do need to remember taht this is a LEGAL board, not a moral/ethical one. LEGALLY, the Mom has the right to move while pregnant w/o informing the father, etc. The place it gets sticky is if she has another child - that father DOES need to be informed, as does the court.

I know that this is a legal advice site, and I try (not always succeeding) to give legal based advice.

If a person in OP's situation were to consult with an attorney, she would be told the same thing LdiJ said, but ALSO would have been told that the father does have the LEGAL RIGHT to petition the court for visitation/paternity/support. AND she would be told that in order to protect HER legal interests, she should try to keep the father informed.

Allowing OP to think that there would never be any legal repercussions from her refusing to allow father to exersize his legal right, is akin to advising a father-to-be to move without letting mom to be know so that she couldn't file for support.

Sometimes the legal and moral becomes entwined , I believe that this is one of those situations where they have, which is why I posted.

LdiJ,
Maybe I was a lttle harsh, if so I apologize.
Gracie

 

[stealth2]

Actually, Gracie.... since the parents are not married to one another, the father has ABSOLUTELY NO rights until the child is born and paternity is proven. The state in which the child is BORN would hold jurisdiction (in most cases - a handful of states try to exert jurisdiction if the child was conceived there - I don't think CA is on, although I could be mistaken). So OP would be told - by an attorney - that if she planned to move she should do so prior to the child's birth.

Again, however, it is an entirely different story ifthere is another child involved.

 

[nextwife]

secretspecial, what is the current situation with your already born child? Is paternity/custody/visitation legally established? Where is the father residing and does he have a visitation schedule that would be impacted by a move?

 

[LdiJ]

Actually, Gracie.... since the parents are not married to one another, the father has ABSOLUTELY NO rights until the child is born and paternity is proven. The state in which the child is BORN would hold jurisdiction (in most cases - a handful of states try to exert jurisdiction if the child was conceived there - I don't think CA is on, although I could be mistaken). So OP would be told - by an attorney - that if she planned to move she should do so prior to the child's birth.

Again, however, it is an entirely different story ifthere is another child involved.

Actually Stealth...from what I have observed it isn't states that try to do that...its individual judges.....and I haven't found any case law anywhere that shows anyone succeeding at that beyond the trial court level.

I am having sooooo much fun with Lexis-Nexis...LOL I only discovered a couple of months ago that I have online access to it through the university where I am working on my masters. Its incredibly more efficient than anything else I have used to pinpoint case law....no wonder a subscription costs so much...sigh.

 

[Gracie3787]

Please don't misunderstand, I'm not trying to argue because I basically agree with the strictly legal aspects of what everyone is saying. One of my biggest pet peeves is double standards and I hope no one minds if I ask a question.

Would the same advice ( without comment on morality )be given to a father-to-be if he posted asking the same basic question- Mother and I aren't married, I can't afford to stay in this state, I'm afraid the mother will try to stop me from moving, I'll tell her 6 months after I move, what would happen legally if I moved to another state without telling the mother?

I already know the answer because very similar questions have been asked- legal advice given and then the poster is told that they have to support thier child, running away won't make their obligation go away, etc.

Why is okay to moralize and tell a father about his obligations and it isn't okay to moralize and tell a mother about her obligations?
Just curious.
Gracie

 

[LdiJ]

Please don't misunderstand, I'm not trying to argue because I basically agree with the strictly legal aspects of what everyone is saying. One of my biggest pet peeves is double standards and I hope no one minds if I ask a question.

Would the same advice ( without comment on morality )be given to a father-to-be if he posted asking the same basic question- Mother and I aren't married, I can't afford to stay in this state, I'm afraid the mother will try to stop me from moving, I'll tell her 6 months after I move, what would happen legally if I moved to another state without telling the mother?

I already know the answer because very similar questions have been asked- legal advice given and then the poster is told that they have to support thier child, running away won't make their obligation go away, etc.

Why is okay to moralize and tell a father about his obligations and it isn't okay to moralize and tell a mother about her obligations?
Just curious.
Gracie

Gracie....an unwed father is not restricted in any way. An unwed father can do whatever the heck he wants.....yeah he is stuck with child support...but other than that he is not restricted. No one is going to take away his custody/visitation rights because he moved....or at least an ncp moved. He/she might have to move more slowly...but they don't lose their rights.

 

[stealth2]

I already know the answer because very similar questions have been asked- legal advice given and then the poster is told that they have to support thier child, running away won't make their obligation go away, etc.

Why is okay to moralize and tell a father about his obligations and it isn't okay to moralize and tell a mother about her obligations?
Just curious.
Gracie

Gracie - that is just a stupid question. I'm sorry. Until the child is born, Mom doesn't have any obligations to the man-who-might-be-Dad. Until paternity is proven, man-who-might-be-Dad has no obligations to Mom.

 

[nextwife]

However, let's be very clear to our poster that any move-away that would interfer with any CURRENT court ordered visitation for her first child must be approved by either the biodad or the courts, or she could lose custody. It's not that father's problem that mom is having another baby.

 

[snostar]

OP - if you have another child, you must follow the state guidelines about moving the child outside of CA. You WILL have to notify the father a certain period of time prior to your move (I don't recall if it's 30 or 60 days) and he WILL have the right to contest the move.

It's 45 days advance notice to the other parent, and of course that only applies if paternity has been legally established.