Sorry I hit the wrong button. This was after telling him what was approved wording here about the order not requiring his permission
I believe it is you who are mistaken in your understanding of visitation. You do not have the same rights for day-to-day decisions and while you do have say in what goes on while daughter is in your care - to an extent, you need to realize that I need to be informed in what and where Daughter is doing. If she is spending the night or leaving the state I am to be aware of it. Visitation is simply the time the parent who does not have "Physical and Legal custody" spends with the child. It does not give you the vast overreaching decision making power you claim to have. I do not know where you are getting your information but it is simply not accurate. I have discussed this in detail with my attorney and he agrees.
As I started by saying, I in no way want to be confrontational about any of this but I think it is time that you abide and respect the ruling made well over a year ago. My concern is for Daughter's care and best interest and the excuse that you " are Daughter's mother" is simply not good enough. Visitation does not
allow you to blanket parent "as you see fit". Legal custody allows for me to make the major decisions in her life and that include but is not limited to school, healthcare, religious upbringing, and discipline. I feel that if I come to you with a concern about who and where she spends the night, how homework is to be done or if she should or shouldn't have a cell phone then you should respect that and realize it comes from a place of care and concern. Rather than simply refuting the concern because you are her mother, lets try the Co-parenting attitude you strive for.
I have recently come to find out that due to your new work schedule you have been unable to pick Daughter up from school and incidentally she has been left at school with Your friend. I do not feel this is in Daughter's best interest and would like to see an alternative that provides for Daughter to have stable and consistent after school routine. Daughter has expressed concern that she doesn't know where she is going from one day to the next. This is causing her anxiety that is completely avoidable if she had a stable routine while in your care.
Finally, as I have mentioned before, there are to be no disparaging remarks made to or around Daughter about the other parent. Daughter came home today and mentioned that you told her you were "mad at" me. While she did not go in to further detail I find the fact that you are open enough to tell her and express that you are mad (at me) to be disparaging and this is violation of the agreement. Let this serve as the final warning, I am trying to work with you and come to understanding of what is expected and time and time again you fight me every step of the way. I ask one last and final time that moving forward you abide by the order; respect it, myself and Stepmom and make decisions with Daughter's best interest in mind rather than what is easiest and best for you in the moment. If you cannot than I am prepared to file a Motion in the cause to address these issues.
So one, our daughter does not show signs of anxiety about after school care. It was only five days she went with a friend who is actually a teacher at her school. She knew the entire week she was going with her. Two, it was the first week of school and she was with me, how could he see signs of anxiety about it? I never told her I was mad and I never even mention stepmom to not show respect. If anything, the disparaging part comes from them because they are always telling her that they have custody and I don't get any decisions. They are driving a wedge between our daughter and me.
What should I do? It'll be two years in January since the first order. Everything was calm until our daughter started telling me how she felt about things. I sent my ex a few texts asking to have a sit down so our daughter could express her feelings. Since then, stepmom has become an angel and they seem to be attacking me.