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Question Regarding Proposed Temp Parenting Plan

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daddy1980

Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Washington State

Here is my 2 previous threads regarding my situation

https://forum.freeadvice.com/child-custody-visitation-37/i-father-would-like-more-time-my-daughter-504352.html#post2486597

https://forum.freeadvice.com/child-custody-visitation-37/question-regarding-visitation-cancellation-504747.html


So for you that have read my previous posts and responded and helped i truly appreciate it but i have a new question.


I have decided not to file contempt charges against the ex and have decided to just file for a Proposed Temporary Parenting Plan.


So i have a couple questions since i am doing this Pro-Se other then i have had some help with paperwork from local legal aid.


I have 2 questions regarding this parenting plan that i am proposing.

#1 In my proposed temp parenting plan the legal aid lady put that the mom is to have our daughter during school year,summer break,school breaks, and put myself to have her during winter breaks. my question is since she is 5 years away from starting school is this gonna be only a proposed temp plan will i still have a choice to change all this when i come up with my final parenting plan or is this stuck in stone? (Basically i wanna know if whats in the proposed temp plan is gonna screw me when i wanna change some of it in the FINAL parenting plan?



#2 I have proposed the following progressive time in my temp parenting plan and was wondering what you guys/gals think my chances are of getting this time?

April. Mon and Wed 4 Hour unsupervised visits
May. Mon and Wed 8 Hour unsupervised visits
June Wed 8 Hour unsupervised visit and Sat 7pm - Sun 7pm (overnight)
July Wed 8 Hour unsupervised visit and Sat 7pm - Sun 7pm (overnight)
June 20th (fathers day 10am - 6pm)


Then in my decleration i mention i will be proposing a new order in August.

I also requested in my decleration that i would like to go to co-parenting counseling (if mom agrees) for the fact that i believe it would be in our daughters best interest if we could co-parent.


I hope i said this all right lol if anyone has any questions before they give me advice please let me know as i will be filing this probably on monday and wanna make sure im doing it all correct and not screwing myself for my later final parenting plan proposal.

This is the biggest thing i will ever do in my life and wanna make sure im doing it correct.


I also wanted to add that a couple weeks ago when mom came to drop off our daughter she mentioned to my mom that she probably wouldnt have a babysitter here soon and wanted to know if (my mother and father) or anyone in my family wanted to start babysitting our daughter. (should i mention that in court at all?)
 
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stealth2

Under the Radar Member
#1 In my proposed temp parenting plan the legal aid lady put that the mom is to have our daughter during school year,summer break,school breaks, and put myself to have her during winter breaks.
Uuuuh.... so you get her for 1-2 weeks in winter, and Mom gets the rest of all the breaks? Why? Ask for at least half the summer, half the breaks, half the holidays, and at least standard visitation (every other w/e and one night during the week).

#2 I have proposed the following progressive time in my temp parenting plan and was wondering what you guys/gals think my chances are of getting this time?

April. Mon and Wed 4 Hour unsupervised visits
May. Mon and Wed 8 Hour unsupervised visits
June Wed 8 Hour unsupervised visit and Sat 7pm - Sun 7pm (overnight)
July Wed 8 Hour unsupervised visit and Sat 7pm - Sun 7pm (overnight)
June 20th (fathers day 10am - 6pm)


Then in my decleration i mention i will be proposing a new order in August.
Why not include what happens after the July schedule now? WHat are you planning to propose?
 

daddy1980

Member
Uuuuh.... so you get her for 1-2 weeks in winter, and Mom gets the rest of all the breaks? Why? Ask for at least half the summer, half the breaks, half the holidays, and at least standard visitation (every other w/e and one night during the week).

I was told by legal aid that proposing a progressive temporary parenting plan was what i should do and is what the judge would like to see?


Why not include what happens after the July schedule now? WHat are you planning to propose?
I was planning on proposing a final parenting plan in August in which at that time i was gonna go for shared 50/50 physical custody.


If i am not doing this right please please let me know

I thought i temp parenting plan was just to get more time untill a final parenting plan was proposed?

So if i were to ask for EOW and one night during the week would that mean EOW that wasnt my weekend i wouldnt get to see her at all? meaning 1 week i get her 1 night during the week and the weekend and the next week i wouldnt see her at all?
 
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CJane

Senior Member
I was planning on proposing a final parenting plan in August in which at that time i was gonna go for shared 50/50 physical custody.


If i am not doing this right please please let me know

I thought i temp parenting plan was just to get more time untill a final parenting plan was proposed?

So if i were to ask for EOW and one night during the week would that mean EOW that wasnt my weekend i wouldnt get to see her at all? meaning 1 week i get her 1 night during the week and the weekend and the next week i wouldnt see her at all?
"Standard" is generally e/o weekend, one evening visit during the week (dinner visit), alternating holidays/school breaks and anywhere from 2 uninterrupted weeks to 1/2 the summer.

HOWEVER, considering the fact that you're currently only receiving very short supervised visits and not allowed to even be in the same room as Mom? I just don't see you getting a 50/50 schedule, or even a standard schedule yet.

Your proposal for a graduated schedule isn't too bad. Might want to google the Indiana Parenting Time Guidelines, their graduated schedule is pretty good.
 

DAD10

Registered User
What about holidays?
Do you intend to graduate that towards August?
 
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daddy1980

Member
What about holidays?
Do you intend to graduate that towards August?
For hollidays it states in my proposed temp plan that i get even year and she gets them odd years except mothers/fathers day which i stated she ger her mothers day and i get her fathers day :)

Also it states that on her birthday we both get time with her
 

CJane

Senior Member
For hollidays it states in my proposed temp plan that i get even year and she gets them odd years except mothers/fathers day which i stated she ger her mothers day and i get her fathers day :)

Also it states that on her birthday we both get time with her
Your even year/odd year plan isn't exactly fair. A child should not spend EVERY holiday with EITHER parent in a year.

It needs to be more like:

In Even Years, Dad will have New Years Eve from X to Y.
Easter
4th of July
Labor Day (including the weekend)
Thanksgiving (including the weekend)
Christmas Day

In Odd Years, Dad will have New Years Day from X to Y
Memorial Day (Including the weekend)
Halloween
Christmas Eve

Something like that, anyway. SOME holiday time with BOTH parents EVERY year.
 

daddy1980

Member
I am trying to do whats right here. I wanna do a progressive plan that works into a 50/50 shared physical custody as i do strongly believe it is in our daughters best interest to share equal time with both her mother and myself.

I have very limited time with our daughter right now as ordered in DV court.

I was told by the court facilitator that i need to get our case out of DV court and get it into Family court so i can start getting more time with our daughter.

I dont wanna spring to much at once on either the court or my ex hence the graduated plan.


I just dont wanna file this "proposed temporary parenting plan" if its gonna effect what the "final parenting plan"is gonna look like.


im confused on what i should do :-(
 

DAD10

Registered User
Can you contact ex to fine tune it?
It sound to me like your on the right track although I agree with CJane - on the holiday issue ex Christmas eve-Parent A Christmas Day Parent B.
 

CJane

Senior Member
I am trying to do whats right here. I wanna do a progressive plan that works into a 50/50 shared physical custody as i do strongly believe it is in our daughters best interest to share equal time with both her mother and myself.
Why do you feel that is in her best interests? A 50/50 plan is a LOT of work for the parents and CAN be extremely unstable for the child. It takes WORK to make it seem "normal" and the parents MUST be able to work together regularly.

Even in intact families, responsibilities are rarely split 50/50.

I have very limited time with our daughter right now as ordered in DV court.

I was told by the court facilitator that i need to get our case out of DV court and get it into Family court so i can start getting more time with our daughter.
That might be a struggle.

I dont wanna spring to much at once on either the court or my ex hence the graduated plan.


I just dont wanna file this "proposed temporary parenting plan" if its gonna effect what the "final parenting plan"is gonna look like.


im confused on what i should do :-(
Of course it will affect the "final parenting plan" because you'll be establishing status quo. You can't work up to 50/50 one day at a time. Just can't.

And, there's no reason to assume that a judge will just sign off on what you're proposing anyway.

DAD10 - he can't contact Ex. He's not allowed to even be in the room during exchanges due to DV.
 

DAD10

Registered User
I understand that. Sorry my eyes are shot tonight-and I re-read.
Regardless good luck OP and goodnite forum.
 

daddy1980

Member
Your even year/odd year plan isn't exactly fair. A child should not spend EVERY holiday with EITHER parent in a year.

It needs to be more like:

In Even Years, Dad will have New Years Eve from X to Y.
Easter
4th of July
Labor Day (including the weekend)
Thanksgiving (including the weekend)
Christmas Day

In Odd Years, Dad will have New Years Day from X to Y
Memorial Day (Including the weekend)
Halloween
Christmas Eve

Something like that, anyway. SOME holiday time with BOTH parents EVERY year.


I think i might have not explained the hollidays correct.

I dont mean i get her all holidays during one year and her mother gets them all the next year what i mean what for each holliday i get either odd year or even year and same for her mother if that makes sense
 
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