What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? New Jersey
Well my case is complicated as I assume most divorces are. Here is my background:
After the birth of my second child in February 2007 I suffered from post-partum depression and began drinking heavily. I was self-medicating. I immediately realized it was a problem and went to several short term detoxes in the following months. None of these worked as they were only a week or so long. By the time May came my family confronted me and had me go to rehab in Texas for 45 days. When I returned I continued to drink because I suppose I wasn't ready to remain sober. It wasn't until February 2008 until I finally kicked the habit. My husband and I were still having problems, he resented me for my alcoholism and I resented him for his lack of attention to the family (he would often take off surfing or snowboarding whenever he wanted skipping holidays and parties and family events.)
I went to visit my brother in North Carolina in July and when I returned I went on the computer for something and found out he was cheating on me. There were searches for were to take a date, articles he looked up called "why do women love sex with married men." I printed them out but in the midst of it he returned home and ripped them out of my hand and destroyed them. Anyway, my point is that that night I fell off the wagon. My husband and I got into a huge fight and I threw a statue at him. He called the police and I was arrested. He filed a restraining order against me. He dropped it under conditions that I have supervised visitation with my kids. I was kicked out of my house and I see my kids under strict guidelines.
Since I have been out of my house in July he has taken my journal that I wrote during my time in rehab and is threatening me with it. He also hacked into my email and several other accounts such as AIM and Facebook where I was talking to some of my old friends about the divorce etc. I said some not so nice things about him in the process. He has printed out the conversations and is threatening to use them against me as character. He has said he doesn't want my family around the kids who are 2 and 4 because of things I wrote in my diary about my parents when I was growing up.
My questions are these:
Is my diary from rehab admissible in court? It was used therapeutically to work through my addiction which really bothers me. Examples of things that were said in the diary were admitting drinking the day we picked up my daughter from the hospital etc. (I am not proud of such things, I did them during my addiction which I am proud to say that I am in recovery now.)
Is he able to use those conversations in which obtained conversations by hacking into my accounts in court? Can I argue that he had my password and could have pretended to be me to be me in order to get evidence against me?
Will these things make a difference in the custody decision?
How much weight does a judge put on the parent who was primary caretaker for the majority of the children's lives? (I did everything for the children for our entire four year marriage)
My husband also let the car insurance and health insurance lapse after he signed an affidavit not to change anything. My children and I are without health insurance. I always organized and handled the accounts and finances. Since the divorce started it has all gone downhill. Will the judge consider the fact that he can't manage important accounts into the custody decision?
Any help would be appreciated. This is not an easy time in my life and I am trying to be as strong as possible. I own the mistakes and choices that I made that helped get me in this situation whereas my husband is not. There is of course much more to the story and I did not bring up the things he has done to help contribute to the divorce.
I would also like to say that my kids are currently in daycare and I am asking for primary physical custody so that they can spend their days with me instead of a stranger. My husband prefers they stay in daycare because he is out for blood, hates me and wants to win.
Well my case is complicated as I assume most divorces are. Here is my background:
After the birth of my second child in February 2007 I suffered from post-partum depression and began drinking heavily. I was self-medicating. I immediately realized it was a problem and went to several short term detoxes in the following months. None of these worked as they were only a week or so long. By the time May came my family confronted me and had me go to rehab in Texas for 45 days. When I returned I continued to drink because I suppose I wasn't ready to remain sober. It wasn't until February 2008 until I finally kicked the habit. My husband and I were still having problems, he resented me for my alcoholism and I resented him for his lack of attention to the family (he would often take off surfing or snowboarding whenever he wanted skipping holidays and parties and family events.)
I went to visit my brother in North Carolina in July and when I returned I went on the computer for something and found out he was cheating on me. There were searches for were to take a date, articles he looked up called "why do women love sex with married men." I printed them out but in the midst of it he returned home and ripped them out of my hand and destroyed them. Anyway, my point is that that night I fell off the wagon. My husband and I got into a huge fight and I threw a statue at him. He called the police and I was arrested. He filed a restraining order against me. He dropped it under conditions that I have supervised visitation with my kids. I was kicked out of my house and I see my kids under strict guidelines.
Since I have been out of my house in July he has taken my journal that I wrote during my time in rehab and is threatening me with it. He also hacked into my email and several other accounts such as AIM and Facebook where I was talking to some of my old friends about the divorce etc. I said some not so nice things about him in the process. He has printed out the conversations and is threatening to use them against me as character. He has said he doesn't want my family around the kids who are 2 and 4 because of things I wrote in my diary about my parents when I was growing up.
My questions are these:
Is my diary from rehab admissible in court? It was used therapeutically to work through my addiction which really bothers me. Examples of things that were said in the diary were admitting drinking the day we picked up my daughter from the hospital etc. (I am not proud of such things, I did them during my addiction which I am proud to say that I am in recovery now.)
Is he able to use those conversations in which obtained conversations by hacking into my accounts in court? Can I argue that he had my password and could have pretended to be me to be me in order to get evidence against me?
Will these things make a difference in the custody decision?
How much weight does a judge put on the parent who was primary caretaker for the majority of the children's lives? (I did everything for the children for our entire four year marriage)
My husband also let the car insurance and health insurance lapse after he signed an affidavit not to change anything. My children and I are without health insurance. I always organized and handled the accounts and finances. Since the divorce started it has all gone downhill. Will the judge consider the fact that he can't manage important accounts into the custody decision?
Any help would be appreciated. This is not an easy time in my life and I am trying to be as strong as possible. I own the mistakes and choices that I made that helped get me in this situation whereas my husband is not. There is of course much more to the story and I did not bring up the things he has done to help contribute to the divorce.
I would also like to say that my kids are currently in daycare and I am asking for primary physical custody so that they can spend their days with me instead of a stranger. My husband prefers they stay in daycare because he is out for blood, hates me and wants to win.