religion & kids?

[neck]

No, it's not. Court orders are necessary because unfortunately most estranged parents can't manage to put their differences aside in order to be good co-parents. Or, less commonly, one parent can be a complete D while the other is relatively sane and normal. Court orders protect the rights of both parents but more importantly those orders are protecting the poor child/ren who have no say about whatever idiocy their parents bring forth.

So when Mom tells the court that you refuse to talk to her about it - remember she DID text you (and if you two are contentious you can bet your behind that she'll have proof she texted you) - what are you going to say? Seriously - what are you going to tell the judge?

"Well, we don't talk, your Honor".

"But Mom did notify you - why did you refuse to discuss this with her? Is it your intent to keep bucking against my order? Fine. Let's change it. Mom, you now have sole legal custody, which means you get to make all of the decisions. Period".

Do you see how this can work?

Now. I'm not saying Mom is in the right here. I'm not saying you're in the right here. I AM saying that you will not be able to stop Mom from exposing your mutual child to her choice of religion, just as she cannot stop you from exposing your mutual child to your religion (or lack thereof).

thank for for the reply it is appreciated.

i did respond back to her and told her i was not aware of her choosing a religion and why she never even mentioned it to me and that i did not agree with it...she will continue with the dedication on said date but i think you are right at the end of the day we will both have to guide and teach her our own beliefs or lack thereof and let her decide

so the answers to my questions would be?
1. no
2. no
3. depends on church/pastor
4. n/a

thank you everyone who replied i read every reply and thought deeply about what you said

 

[Proserpina]

thank for for the reply it is appreciated.

i did respond back to her and told her i was not aware of her choosing a religion and why she never even mentioned it to me and that i did not agree with it...she will continue with the dedication on said date but i think you are right at the end of the day we will both have to guide and teach her our own beliefs or lack thereof and let her decide

so the answers to my questions would be?
1. no
2. no
3. depends on church/pastor
4. n/a

thank you everyone who replied i read every reply and thought deeply about what you said

My God I love your response - this is an awesome and refreshing response! Thank you!

I know it's a common phrase jibjabbing around the interwebz at the moment, but "You do you" comes to mind here. You keep being the parent that you are and Mom will sort herself out. The court trusts both of you to be parents to this wonderful child you both created. I know that sometimes it seems like one parent is constantly giving, and giving, and giving while the other seems to take, take, take but honestly? When all is said and done it very often works out eventually and once the child is an adult she can reflect on her own childhood and see what's what all by herself.

Y'know?

 

[stealth2]

yes you are right it does not equate to consent so do i have any legal ground to get an injuction to stop it? my court order specifically states "confer" me and BM are not on talking terms so none of that is going on...also if i don't have to give consent then isn't the whole court order useless?

Again - did you tell her you're against it and why? If not, a judge is more likely to see you as the problem.

And - did you read any of the information regarding what dedication *actually* means? Do you understand that a court is unlikely to stop a parent from sharing his/her beliefs with their child? Do you understand that such a ruling would also bar YOU from sharing your beliefs with the child? It's a two-way street.

 

[neck]

Again - did you tell her you're against it and why? If not, a judge is more likely to see you as the problem.

And - did you read any of the information regarding what dedication *actually* means? Do you understand that a court is unlikely to stop a parent from sharing his/her beliefs with their child? Do you understand that such a ruling would also bar YOU from sharing your beliefs with the child? It's a two-way street.

yes i did tell her...no response.

i know what a dedication is and the procedure and i never said i wanted to stop her from sharing her beliefs i asked if i can get an injunction to stop a religious ceremony.

once again this is what i wrote
" i feel like Parents can guide, teach, pray for, but 1 parent cannot choose a life path for their child and i feel by her doing this that is what she is doing."

 

[cbg]

No. You cannot get a legal injunction to stop a religious ceremony. Particularly not one that does not do what you "feel" it does. Despite what you "feel", a dedication ceremony places no obligations on the child, only on the parent.

I hope that this is now clear to you.

 

[Ohiogal]

yes i did tell her...no response.

i know what a dedication is and the procedure and i never said i wanted to stop her from sharing her beliefs i asked if i can get an injunction to stop a religious ceremony.

once again this is what i wrote
" i feel like Parents can guide, teach, pray for, but 1 parent cannot choose a life path for their child and i feel by her doing this that is what she is doing."

Your feelings don't matter and you won't get an injunction for this. You would have to prove irreversible harm to get the injunction. Nothing is harmed by a dedication ceremony.

 

[Just Blue]

Personally OP lost me at the "BM".

 

[neck]

Your feelings don't matter and you won't get an injunction for this. You would have to prove irreversible harm to get the injunction. Nothing is harmed by a dedication ceremony.

thank you for your time and being straight forward answering the question.

 

[Proserpina]

yes i did tell her...no response.

i know what a dedication is and the procedure and i never said i wanted to stop her from sharing her beliefs i asked if i can get an injunction to stop a religious ceremony.

If you want to try to use wordplay to your advantage you should probably make sure you actually understand how the game works before you begin.

once again this is what i wrote
" i feel like Parents can guide, teach, pray for, but 1 parent cannot choose a life path for their child and i feel by her doing this that is what she is doing."

Actually, yes - a parent can absolutely choose a life path for their child. Whether or not the other parent agrees, what can be done about it, and whether or not the child continues on that path once they reach adulthood, are different matters entirely.

Are we clear now?