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Relinquish Rights

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dwalls

Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? California
I made a mistake and got pregnant with a man that doesn't want to be the father and really isn't ready to be one. He is going out of his way to make this as difficult for me as possible and has agreed to relinquish his rights. He won't sign anything until paternity is established, I have to wait until I am 13 weeks along before I can do that. Can I draw up a contract between he & I now saying if he is the father he will relinquish rights? I don't want anymore head games, and just need the peice of mind until I can establish paternity. What would I call this contract and are there any CA lawyers that can help me? thank you any information is very appreciated!
 


TheGeekess

Keeper of the Kraken
The only way for him to relinquish anything is for you to have an abortion. Otherwise, he can (at some point after birth) file to establish paternity/custody/visitation.

Trying to get a DNA test before birth is risky to the fetus.
 

Artemis_ofthe_Hunt

Senior Member
The only way for him to relinquish anything is for you to have an abortion. Otherwise, he can (at some point after birth) file to establish paternity/custody/visitation.

Trying to get a DNA test before birth is risky to the fetus.
Risky is an understatement! MOST doctor's will not perform an amnio without due cause. There is a VERY VALID reason for this. Why would you want him to relinquish rights to a child that does not yet (LEGALLY) exist? Anything you do prior to the COURT establishing paternity is jumping the gun.
 

Antigone*

Senior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? California
I made a mistake and got pregnant with a man that doesn't want to be the father and really isn't ready to be one. He is going out of his way to make this as difficult for me as possible and has agreed to relinquish his rights. He won't sign anything until paternity is established, I have to wait until I am 13 weeks along before I can do that. Can I draw up a contract between he & I now saying if he is the father he will relinquish rights? I don't want anymore head games, and just need the peice of mind until I can establish paternity. What would I call this contract and are there any CA lawyers that can help me? thank you any information is very appreciated!
There are no rights for him to relinquish. Until your baby is born and paternity is established he is not the father.
 

dwalls

Junior Member
No doubts on Paternity

He is the father only one I've been with. I have found a clinic where at 13 weeks they can establish paternity using only the mother & fathers blood, no need for an amino. He doesn't want the child at all and abortion is not an option, I'm an responsible (typically with this exception) adult and can provide for the child myself. Is there any personal contract he & I can draw up for the interim time simply stating that he promises to relinquish rights as soon as paternity is established? He & I both agree to this paperwork and both want it legally contracted as soon as possible. Are there no personal contracts that can be drawn? I really just need piece of mind knowing he can't come back and try to have rights. He intentionally is making this as difficult as possible to convince me to get an abortion, I refuse. He will leave me alone as soon as he knows he's in the clear. Is there ANYTHING I can do? I'm desperate and need help, I don't want to waste my time on needless drama when I need to focus on my and my childs health. The added stress he is putting me under only makes things worse, please anything I can do?
 

CSO286

Senior Member
He is the father only one I've been with. I have found a clinic where at 13 weeks they can establish paternity using only the mother & fathers blood, no need for an amino. He doesn't want the child at all and abortion is not an option, I'm an responsible (typically with this exception) adult and can provide for the child myself. Is there any personal contract he & I can draw up for the interim time simply stating that he promises to relinquish rights as soon as paternity is established? He & I both agree to this paperwork and both want it legally contracted as soon as possible. Are there no personal contracts that can be drawn? I really just need piece of mind knowing he can't come back and try to have rights. He intentionally is making this as difficult as possible to convince me to get an abortion, I refuse. He will leave me alone as soon as he knows he's in the clear. Is there ANYTHING I can do? I'm desperate and need help, I don't want to waste my time on needless drama when I need to focus on my and my childs health. The added stress he is putting me under only makes things worse, please anything I can do?

Do tell me how they conclusively establish paternity for the unborn child without a sample of the child's DNA.
I'll wait.

Are you on any type of public asistance? Food support, welfare? Medical?
 
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Just Blue

Senior Member
Do tell me how they establish paternity for the unborn child without a smple of the chid's DNA.
I'll wait.

Are you on any type of public asistance? Food support, welfare? Medical?
Yeah...I would also LOVE to to know this procedure that allows paternity to be tested without proof.

I will also wait....
 

Proserpina

Senior Member
He is the father only one I've been with. I have found a clinic where at 13 weeks they can establish paternity using only the mother & fathers blood, no need for an amino. He doesn't want the child at all and abortion is not an option, I'm an responsible (typically with this exception) adult and can provide for the child myself. Is there any personal contract he & I can draw up for the interim time simply stating that he promises to relinquish rights as soon as paternity is established? He & I both agree to this paperwork and both want it legally contracted as soon as possible. Are there no personal contracts that can be drawn? I really just need piece of mind knowing he can't come back and try to have rights. He intentionally is making this as difficult as possible to convince me to get an abortion, I refuse. He will leave me alone as soon as he knows he's in the clear. Is there ANYTHING I can do? I'm desperate and need help, I don't want to waste my time on needless drama when I need to focus on my and my childs health. The added stress he is putting me under only makes things worse, please anything I can do?


Paternity needs to be LEGALLY established.

That means by court-approved DNA testing.

But that aside, the simple answer to this is "no, you cannot do what you both want to do".
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
He is the father only one I've been with. I have found a clinic where at 13 weeks they can establish paternity using only the mother & fathers blood, no need for an amino. He doesn't want the child at all and abortion is not an option, I'm an responsible (typically with this exception) adult and can provide for the child myself. Is there any personal contract he & I can draw up for the interim time simply stating that he promises to relinquish rights as soon as paternity is established? He & I both agree to this paperwork and both want it legally contracted as soon as possible. Are there no personal contracts that can be drawn? I really just need piece of mind knowing he can't come back and try to have rights. He intentionally is making this as difficult as possible to convince me to get an abortion, I refuse. He will leave me alone as soon as he knows he's in the clear. Is there ANYTHING I can do? I'm desperate and need help, I don't want to waste my time on needless drama when I need to focus on my and my childs health. The added stress he is putting me under only makes things worse, please anything I can do?
NOT going to happen. He doesn't have a child. Just don't establish paternity and never take state aid. Then he doesn't have to be involved. They cannot establish paternity by just mom and dad's blood. The child has to be involved.
 

CSO286

Senior Member
He is the father only one I've been with. I have found a clinic where at 13 weeks they can establish paternity using only the mother & fathers blood, no need for an amino. He doesn't want the child at all and abortion is not an option,
If abortion is not an option, then why did you allow yourself to become pregnant in the first place. Pregnancy is a 100% preventable condition. In any event, I already offered my thoguths on the clinic who can perfoma paternity testing without a child's DNA.

Please, provide a link to clinic's website....

I'm an responsible (typically with this exception) adult and can provide for the child myself. Is there any personal contract he & I can draw up for the interim time simply stating that he promises to relinquish rights as soon as paternity is established?
No there is not. Right now he doesn't have a child. And any contract you draw up bewteen you and hin is unenforceable should he take one look ath the baby if/when it is born and suddenly decide he wants be Daddy.

He & I both agree to this paperwork and both want it legally contracted as soon as possible. Are there no personal contracts that can be drawn?
See above.

I really just need piece of mind knowing he can't come back and try to have rights.
As soon as the child is born--if it is born--Dad can take action to estblish paternity, child support and parenting time, should he choose to do so. On the other hand, Dad can also just walk out of your life completely and never come back in.
However, if you ever need and apply for any type of public asistance, then cooperation with the child support unit (menaing identifying Dad and establishing paternity and child support)is a requirement of eligibility.

He intentionally is making this as difficult as possible to convince me to get an abortion, I refuse. He will leave me alone as soon as he knows he's in the clear.

Is there ANYTHING I can do? I'm desperate and need help, I don't want to waste my time on needless drama when I need to focus on my and my childs health. The added stress he is putting me under only makes things worse, please anything I can do?

Asked and answered.
 

Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
Why are you so eager to NOT stand up for the rights of your (as yet unborn) child?


Poor kid :mad:
 

>Charlotte<

Lurker
Should have thought of that before conception ... since you are the only one who can get preggo, who is to blame?
And since he's whining about not wanting to be a father, when the man who set his sperm off on a death race to the nearest ovum gets here, let's ask him who he thinks is to blame.
 

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