"Although NC doesn't specifically require a stepparent adoption in order to relinquish parents rights, there is still always a possibility that an individual judge won't allow a termination for one reason or another."
In response to this, TPRs in NC go before the Clerk of Court, not a judge. And as long as you file on the grounds allowed by the state, there usually is no debate over this and they allow it with no problem.
"Just realize if you go on state aid of almost any form they will require you to provide daddy's name and quickly."
While this is true, if you don't know the father's name, the state won't refuse you aid, but if you know it and withhold it, then they can refuse it I believe.
§ 7B‑1111. Grounds for terminating parental rights
a) The court may terminate the parental rights upon a finding of one or more of the following:
(5) The father of a juvenile born out of wedlock has not, prior to the filing of a petition or motion to terminate parental rights:
a. Established paternity judicially or by affidavit which has been filed in a central registry maintained by the Department of Health and Human Services; provided, the court shall inquire of the Department of Health and Human Services as to whether such an affidavit has been so filed and shall incorporate into the case record the Department's certified reply; or
b. Legitimated the juvenile pursuant to provisions of G.S. 49‑10 or filed a petition for this specific purpose; or
c. Legitimated the juvenile by marriage to the mother of the juvenile; or
d. Provided substantial financial support or consistent care with respect to the juvenile and mother.
http://www.ncga.state.nc.us/EnactedLegislation/Statutes/HTML/BySection/Chapter_7B/GS_7B-1111.html
There are more grounds listed at that website but these are the ones listed regarding paternity.
Your other option is to get a custody order, requesting sole custody and have put in the order he is not allowed to take the child out of the country and any other stipulations you deem necessary. If you do this TPR, just remember that it is permanent and if things change and you need child support or something, you won't be able to get it.