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Signing over parental rights

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CourtClerk

Senior Member
If he called a horse a cow, would you just let him believe the horse was in fact a cow? Or would you explain it was a horse? :rolleyes:
When my son was almost 2, he used to think everything was a cow. Point to a cat? Say COW...., dog... COW.....

once, the neighbor said hi to him and he said (you guessed it)... COW:eek:
 


CourtClerk

Senior Member
but, i'm really not trying to get into a debate on who my son calls daddy and why. all i want to know is if there is any legal action i can take to force my ex to sign over his rights for the benefit of my son considering he doesn't come around and he is a drug addict with a criminal record and i don't think i need to tell you that that's not benefitting my son in the least.
Here's your answer: NO
 

casa

Senior Member
but, i'm really not trying to get into a debate on who my son calls daddy and why. all i want to know is if there is any legal action i can take to force my ex to sign over his rights for the benefit of my son considering he doesn't come around and he is a drug addict with a criminal record and i don't think i need to tell you that that's not benefitting my son in the least.
No. You can only educate yourself about NC Abandonment guidelines & file it if/when they have been met.
 

hakers1130

Junior Member
Flip side: you layed down, screwed and let a drug addict ejaculate in you and make a baby. YOU CHOSE HIM. Apologize to your child for THAT. You now, decide that the flavor of the month is going to be the next daddy to the baby. You (IMO) have some serious issues with decision making, responsibility, you don't seem stable and all of that makes me question your ability to be a responsible parent. Should we start having your child call you something else too?
i'm not arguing the fact that i made a mistake as everyone does. and i am by no means unstable. as a matter of fact, i'm trying to get myself and my son away from this person so we can have a better life and my son can be well taken care of. but like i said before this has nothing to do with why i did what i did, because that is my business, all i am asking is if anyone has any thoughts as to how i can do this.
 

CourtClerk

Senior Member
i'm not arguing the fact that i made a mistake as everyone does. and i am by no means unstable. as a matter of fact, i'm trying to get myself and my son away from this person so we can have a better life and my son can be well taken care of. but like i said before this has nothing to do with why i did what i did, because that is my business, all i am asking is if anyone has any thoughts as to how i can do this.
A mistake is leaving the house with one navy blue shoe and one black shoe after getting dressed in a dark room. Having sex with someone you know is a criminal and a drug addict isn't a mistake, you did that on purpose. You may want to start with learning the difference and stop trying to downplay your role in this by calling everything you do a mistake, while everything he does you want to condemn him for.

And I for one would call a married woman who is engaged to another man unstable. But I'd call the "fiancee" unstable to for proposing to a woman he knew was married. So maybe you 2 deserve each other, but if that's both your method of thinking, I wouldn't count on this next marriage lasting very long either. Then you get to take your child through 2 divorces... nice.
 

mommyof4

Senior Member
i'm not arguing the fact that i made a mistake as everyone does. and i am by no means unstable. as a matter of fact, i'm trying to get myself and my son away from this person so we can have a better life and my son can be well taken care of. but like i said before this has nothing to do with why i did what i did, because that is my business, all i am asking is if anyone has any thoughts as to how i can do this.
You CAN'T do this.

Even IF you could prove abandonment by his father (which, as you have stated he is paying very little, thus indicating he is paying something...ie: NOT abandonment) the fact is that NC will look at the fact that the child is with a relative (you) and could very easily determine that there is no reason to terminate parental rights.


Let me tell you a little something about NC. The court in NC will give a parent every shred of a glimmer of opportunity to develop a relationship with the child...even IF the parent is a complete loser.

Forced termination of parental rights based on abandonment by one parent to facilitate a step parent adoption is very, very difficult. I personally know of another person going through this and the ex makes yours look like parent of the year. They've been trying to terminate parental rights for 5 years now so that the step can adopt. The reasoning is that the child is not in any danger, is not neglected, etc. The child is already in a perfectly stable home and wants for nothing (the child lives with the father and step mother ready, willing, and able to adopt).

If you ex doesn't consent, it's a one in a million shot. The fact that you are already engaged to another man who your son refers to as "Daddy" and you are not even divorced is going to be a HUGE FREAKING ISSUE when you get to court. A man doesn't have to legally earn the right to be called "Daddy". He accomplishes that feat by depositing sperm, fertilizing an egg, live birth, and establishment of paternity. Paternity was immediately established by your STBX because you are married to the father of your child. It's not the court's fault, your child's fault, your fiancee's fault, OR your STBX's fault that you were so weak in the decision making department that you thought it was a good idea to make a baby with this person. The ONLY person at fault is you. You don't get to make the court clean up YOUR mistakes.
 

CourtClerk

Senior Member
Girl****************************************** you absolutely KILL me sometimes!!! :D
I'm working on this new line of Hallmark cards. It's going in the sorry you're dysfunctional category. Bay sent that warm and fuzzy font to the shop or something and it hasn't come back yet.
 

casa

Senior Member
thank you very much. that is all i needed. and i did find in there that i CAN terminate his rights because he in incapable of caring for my son. and i am. so after all the bull**** comments from other people i finally got what i needed. thank so much again.
Now you have the monumental task of PROVING in court that he is unable to care for your son. Just saying he is a drug addict, won't cut it.
 

mommyof4

Senior Member
thank you very much. that is all i needed. and i did find in there that i CAN terminate his rights because he in incapable of caring for my son. and i am. so after all the bull**** comments from other people i finally got what i needed. thank so much again.
How do you plan on coming up with the money (what, you thought that this would be cheap? You couldn't even afford a divorce atty for 5 flippin' years) to pay for this? How do you plan on proving he is INCAPABLE of caring for a child? Has his brain been amputated? Has he been convicted of harming, murdering or molesting another child?

You go ahead and live in your fantasy. I'm here to tell you that reality is going to slap you upside the head.

Oh, btw, I explored this option in NC. It was a no go. Believe me when I tell you that if anybody should have been able to get involuntary TPR, it would have been in my case. I'm talking issues of abuse, thousands upon thousands behind in CS, identity theft (he used my daughter's ss# to open multiple accounts when she was 2-4 years old), blatant attempts of alienation, and one case of hiding with my child "just to show me he could take her from me at any time". You know what the judge said? That maybe in the future he would straighten out and be able to become a father to my child. The judge didn't want to close the door on that possibility. Yeah...10 years later? Still waiting for that to happen.

You need to wake up.
 

casa

Senior Member
You CAN'T do this.

Even IF you could prove abandonment by his father (which, as you have stated he is paying very little, thus indicating he is paying something...ie: NOT abandonment) the fact is that NC will look at the fact that the child is with a relative (you) and could very easily determine that there is no reason to terminate parental rights.


Let me tell you a little something about NC. The court in NC will give a parent every shred of a glimmer of opportunity to develop a relationship with the child...even IF the parent is a complete loser.

Forced termination of parental rights based on abandonment by one parent to facilitate a step parent adoption is very, very difficult. I personally know of another person going through this and the ex makes yours look like parent of the year. They've been trying to terminate parental rights for 5 years now so that the step can adopt. The reasoning is that the child is not in any danger, is not neglected, etc. The child is already in a perfectly stable home and wants for nothing (the child lives with the father and step mother ready, willing, and able to adopt).

If you ex doesn't consent, it's a one in a million shot. The fact that you are already engaged to another man who your son refers to as "Daddy" and you are not even divorced is going to be a HUGE FREAKING ISSUE when you get to court. A man doesn't have to legally earn the right to be called "Daddy". He accomplishes that feat by depositing sperm, fertilizing an egg, live birth, and establishment of paternity. Paternity was immediately established by your STBX because you are married to the father of your child. It's not the court's fault, your child's fault, your fiancee's fault, OR your STBX's fault that you were so weak in the decision making department that you thought it was a good idea to make a baby with this person. The ONLY person at fault is you. You don't get to make the court clean up YOUR mistakes.
Not only that...but OP skipped to only the part she wanted to read/hear. :rolleyes: She failed to research what it entails to prove a parent incapable...and she failed to read the part that mentions the time frames/ability to do so are only AFTER filing/establishing a Court Order. :cool:
 

hakers1130

Junior Member
You CAN'T do this.

Even IF you could prove abandonment by his father (which, as you have stated he is paying very little, thus indicating he is paying something...ie: NOT abandonment) the fact is that NC will look at the fact that the child is with a relative (you) and could very easily determine that there is no reason to terminate parental rights.


Let me tell you a little something about NC. The court in NC will give a parent every shred of a glimmer of opportunity to develop a relationship with the child...even IF the parent is a complete loser.

Forced termination of parental rights based on abandonment by one parent to facilitate a step parent adoption is very, very difficult. I personally know of another person going through this and the ex makes yours look like parent of the year. They've been trying to terminate parental rights for 5 years now so that the step can adopt. The reasoning is that the child is not in any danger, is not neglected, etc. The child is already in a perfectly stable home and wants for nothing (the child lives with the father and step mother ready, willing, and able to adopt).

If you ex doesn't consent, it's a one in a million shot. The fact that you are already engaged to another man who your son refers to as "Daddy" and you are not even divorced is going to be a HUGE FREAKING ISSUE when you get to court. A man doesn't have to legally earn the right to be called "Daddy". He accomplishes that feat by depositing sperm, fertilizing an egg, live birth, and establishment of paternity. Paternity was immediately established by your STBX because you are married to the father of your child. It's not the court's fault, your child's fault, your fiancee's fault, OR your STBX's fault that you were so weak in the decision making department that you thought it was a good idea to make a baby with this person. The ONLY person at fault is you. You don't get to make the court clean up YOUR mistakes.
never once said that i wanted to court to clean up my messes. i understand my mistakes fully so i wish everyone would stop saying that. all i was asking was if there was anything i could do. i didn't get on here to get slammed over the stupid choices i made in life. but considering that my is incapable of caring for my child and that he is a bad influence due to his drugs and criminal activity i thought i might have a chance. so i really wish everyone would stop pretending they haven't made stupid choices in their lives. and despite what you guys think, i am looking out for the best interest of my child and trying to provide him with a better life and a father who will love him and be there for him when he needs it. and i am done defending myself.
 

CourtClerk

Senior Member
Not only that...but OP skipped to only the part she wanted to read/hear. :rolleyes: She failed to research what it entails to prove a parent incapable...and she failed to read the part that mentions the time frames/ability to do so are only AFTER filing/establishing a Court Order. :cool:
Isn't it apparent that she's only interested in that that she WANTS to read/hear?

I've give the time limit in which she's back here trying to get CS from the new flavor of the month, but shoot, she has to get divorced from the first husband, then have the more successful (maybe) husband to be to adopt him first. Maybe all this will be done in time for the child to get to college with all those benefits she's hoping to get.
 
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