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  1. #1
    memas4 is offline Junior Member
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    Question Single mothers custody rights

    What is the name of your state?Florida

    I live in Florida as a unwed mother, who up to last week lived with the father of my son who is now 2 yrs old. I want to share custody of my son with the father but I want to have custodial custody so he can live with me. I have a job, I will be going back to college in Jan. to be a teacher, I have a house I live in and I have a responsible care giver for my son when I work and go to school. The father does not have a job nor a place to live at this time but because he doesn't like the job I have and because he wants back in he is threatening to take my child from me. I don't have money to hire an attorney so what is the best way for me to get custodial custody without a lawyer?What is the name of your state?
  2. #2
    Blue Meanie is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by memas4 View Post
    What is the name of your state?Florida

    I live in Florida as a unwed mother, who up to last week lived with the father of my son who is now 2 yrs old. I want to share custody of my son with the father but I want to have custodial custody so he can live with me. I have a job, I will be going back to college in Jan. to be a teacher, I have a house I live in and I have a responsible care giver for my son when I work and go to school. The father does not have a job nor a place to live at this time but because he doesn't like the job I have and because he wants back in he is threatening to take my child from me. I don't have money to hire an attorney so what is the best way for me to get custodial custody without a lawyer?What is the name of your state?
    What is your job?
  3. #3
    CourtClerk is offline Senior Member
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    I say joint custody all the way around. Legal and physical. If you wanted a baby all to yourself, you should have made him all by yourself.
  4. #4
    CourtClerk is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by baystategirl View Post
    What is your job?
    Oh God Bay... please don't ask that. I'm afraid of the answer...
  5. #5
    memas4 is offline Junior Member
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    single mom and custody

    Quote Originally Posted by baystategirl View Post
    What is your job?
    I went to school and got a degree in culinary arts but because I am alone to support myself I had to take a job in a upscale wine and beer, with food and I serve, cook and bartend. This is why I am continueing my education so I can get a teaches job in culinary.
  6. #6
    memas4 is offline Junior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by CourtClerk View Post
    I say joint custody all the way around. Legal and physical. If you wanted a baby all to yourself, you should have made him all by yourself.
    I agree but both parents have to be on the same page
  7. #7
    CourtClerk is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by memas4 View Post
    I agree but both parents have to be on the same page
    Actually.... legally, no they don't.

    That's why I continue to have a job.
  8. #8
    CourtClerk is offline Senior Member
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    Has dad been legally adjudicated the father of this child?

    It's not too far of a stretch to think that shared custody is in order, both legal and physical, especially if you too are living somewhat close to each other.

    As far as how to obtain a custody order, visit your local legal aid and ask them for assistance in representing yourself.
  9. #9
    memas4 is offline Junior Member
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    He is the legal father and my son has his last name.
  10. #10
    memas4 is offline Junior Member
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    I'm not disputing that, I just want custodial custody because I am in a better financial place plus I want him to live with me. He's the one threatening to take my son away because he isn't in control of me or my home anymore. His family lives out of state and I don't want him leaving the state with my son. He has threatened to do so so all I am trying to do is protect my son and myself.
  11. #11
    CJane is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by memas4 View Post
    I'm not disputing that, I just want custodial custody because I am in a better financial place plus I want him to live with me. He's the one threatening to take my son away because he isn't in control of me or my home anymore. His family lives out of state and I don't want him leaving the state with my son. He has threatened to do so so all I am trying to do is protect my son and myself.
    Until a court orders otherwise, you have sole custody of the child.

    JOINT LEGAL custody only means that you share in decision making for things like medical, educational and religious things.

    SOLE LEGAL custody means that you don't share in decision making.

    JOINT PHYSICAL custody means that the child lives with one of you and visits the other.

    There is no such thing as CUSTODIAL CUSTODY.

    I think that what you mean is that you want PRIMARY PHYSICAL which only means that the child lives with you more often than the child lives with Dad, and which is very likely to be granted.
  12. #12
    Ohiogal is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by memas4 View Post
    I'm not disputing that, I just want custodial custody because I am in a better financial place plus I want him to live with me. He's the one threatening to take my son away because he isn't in control of me or my home anymore. His family lives out of state and I don't want him leaving the state with my son. He has threatened to do so so all I am trying to do is protect my son and myself.
    In addition to what Cjane said, dad WILL be able to leave the state with HIS son. This child is NOT just your child but his as well. YOu are going to need to deal with that aspect.
    Parents should remember 3 things: Love your kids more than you hate your ex; when you have children the relationship with the other parent is until death; your children determine what type of nursing home you end up in.
    Nothing stated by me should be taken as giving you legal advice or forming an attorney/client relationship.

    Attorney-GAL in Ohio.

    I've removed the knife from my back, polished it, and will one day return it -- long after you think I have forgotten.
  13. #13
    LdiJ is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ohiogal View Post
    In addition to what Cjane said, dad WILL be able to leave the state with HIS son. This child is NOT just your child but his as well. YOu are going to need to deal with that aspect.
    Just to clarify, she means that dad will be able to travel out of state with the child. She doesn't mean that dad can just up and move the child out of state.
  14. #14
    nextwife is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by memas4 View Post
    I'm not disputing that, I just want custodial custody because I am in a better financial place
    A parent does not need to be in a "superior financial position" to either have or share physical custody.

    Quote Originally Posted by memas4 View Post
    plus I want him to live with me.
    And dad wants the same. Thankfully, custody is not solely determined by what either parent wants FOR THEMSELF. This child has TWO parents.

    Quote Originally Posted by memas4 View Post
    He's the one threatening to take my son away because he isn't in control of me or my home anymore.
    Why is a parent wanting to co-raise their OWN child about YOU and controlling YOU? His desire to co-raise his son is no less legit than is yours. Stating that wanting to parent his child is about hurting YOU does come off as a tad ego-centric.

    Get over the "he's MY son" business. The child has TWO parents, and dad is also his parent. Aren't you trying to "take his son away", doing the same you are claiming dad is doing, to him?

    Quote Originally Posted by memas4 View Post
    I His family lives out of state and I don't want him leaving the state with my son. He has threatened to do so so all I am trying to do is protect my son and myself.
    Either of you will be able to travel during your respective times of possession to visit out of state if you wish. There is no valid reason out of state viisits would be disallowed, based upon your post. Why shouldn't his family also meet his child?
    Last edited by nextwife; 11-05-2007 at 08:36 AM.

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