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Statute of limitations for perjury

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crhsah

Member
What is the name of your state? WA

Background: female divorced with 1 child; even though I left him 5 years ago, it took me 2 1/2 years to obtain a divorce due to his delays with producing paperwork.

He has had me in court twice since. He has told massive lies. He is trying to make a case that I am attempting parental alienation and constantly withholding our son from him. This could eventually put me in jail and bankrupt me if I don't put an end to it.

eg: He told the courts that he had been making nightly telephone calls to our son. He had been given permission to do so, but had never done it until just the month before he took me to court. I paid $200 to get his phone records, which prove this is a lie. He has just recently stated that he had to call the police because he "hadn't heard from our son in 2 weeks." That he made his nightly phone calls and there was no answer. I could pay for more phone records to prove that this is a lie. He was supposed to have our son for Halloween. He went to the school party (right before court appearance), but walked out and left him. He later told the courts that he had left because there was a theft at his place of employment. He had already told me that it had happened days earlier. I could get the police record. etc. etc. etc. ad nauseum:(

I just need to know if I could have him charged with perjury so that I could call an end to this
 


LdiJ

Senior Member
What is the name of your state? WA

Background: female divorced with 1 child; even though I left him 5 years ago, it took me 2 1/2 years to obtain a divorce due to his delays with producing paperwork.

He has had me in court twice since. He has told massive lies. He is trying to make a case that I am attempting parental alienation and constantly withholding our son from him. This could eventually put me in jail and bankrupt me if I don't put an end to it.

eg: He told the courts that he had been making nightly telephone calls to our son. He had been given permission to do so, but had never done it until just the month before he took me to court. I paid $200 to get his phone records, which prove this is a lie. He has just recently stated that he had to call the police because he "hadn't heard from our son in 2 weeks." That he made his nightly phone calls and there was no answer. I could pay for more phone records to prove that this is a lie. He was supposed to have our son for Halloween. He went to the school party (right before court appearance), but walked out and left him. He later told the courts that he had left because there was a theft at his place of employment. He had already told me that it had happened days earlier. I could get the police record. etc. etc. etc. ad nauseum:(

I just need to know if I could have him charged with perjury so that I could call an end to this
Getting him charged with perjury probably isn't going to happen. So many people lie in so many family law cases that a DA probably would have no interest in prosecuting someone for perjury in that instance.

However, the more you prove that he is lying about important facts, the more likely it is that the judge will get fed up with dad, and start sanctioning him. If he gets a fine, or has to pay your attorney (you should ask for that every time) then he will start thinking twice about lying and filing frivolous motions.

So...get the phone records and get the police report, and prove that he is lying again, remind the judge that this happened once before, and ask the judge to sanction him.
 

crhsah

Member
this whole thing has been such an eye opener...you just always assume that everything is based on facts and that if a person doesn't have proof, they won't be believed...it's frightening to thin that you could eventually end up in jail just because some keeps repeating the same lies..

So, should I just wait until he takes me to court again and try to get the information in? Should I send information to judges after the case is over? Or should I take him to court?

For example, after the case 2 years ago my ex sat on the stand and CRIED about how I was plotting to deprive him of his child and he couldn't stand the thought of being without him. A few weeks later, I asked him if he would take our son for 3 extra days around (his) spring break so that I could take an airline flight to see my fiance in 3 weeks.

Of cours he refused those 3 extra days which accomodated my flight time. The week before the flight was to take off, he asked if I was still going and I said I was. He then said that he had refused those days because he didn't want to interfere with our son's schooling. I told him that it wasn't a problem because I was flying a relative in to stay with him. To which his immediate response was to ask to have those days. I told him that he could not as arrangements were already made.

On the Friday on which spring break commenced, my brother drove to the child exchange site to drop my son off. The father didn't show up.

What do I do with this sort of information? Does it go to the judge who had just ruled? Do I sue for contempt of court for his not abiding by the parenting plan? Do I wait unitl sued again and hope to slip it in?
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
this whole thing has been such an eye opener...you just always assume that everything is based on facts and that if a person doesn't have proof, they won't be believed...it's frightening to thin that you could eventually end up in jail just because some keeps repeating the same lies..

So, should I just wait until he takes me to court again and try to get the information in? Should I send information to judges after the case is over? Or should I take him to court?

For example, after the case 2 years ago my ex sat on the stand and CRIED about how I was plotting to deprive him of his child and he couldn't stand the thought of being without him. A few weeks later, I asked him if he would take our son for 3 extra days around (his) spring break so that I could take an airline flight to see my fiance in 3 weeks.

Of cours he refused those 3 extra days which accomodated my flight time. The week before the flight was to take off, he asked if I was still going and I said I was. He then said that he had refused those days because he didn't want to interfere with our son's schooling. I told him that it wasn't a problem because I was flying a relative in to stay with him. To which his immediate response was to ask to have those days. I told him that he could not as arrangements were already made.

On the Friday on which spring break commenced, my brother drove to the child exchange site to drop my son off. The father didn't show up.

What do I do with this sort of information? Does it go to the judge who had just ruled? Do I sue for contempt of court for his not abiding by the parenting plan? Do I wait unitl sued again and hope to slip it in?
So, you are saying that there isn't anything going on in court right now?

What I would suggest that you do then, is keep a daily journal regarding dad and the child. Make notes daily regarding absolutely anything at all that happens. Note every visit, every phone call (the time and its duration), make notes of anything that you and dad discuss, etc., etc., etc.

Then, if he takes you to court again, then obtain hard evidence to refute any lies that he has included in his paperwork, BEFORE you go to court, and use your journal to help refute any additional lies that he tells in court.
 

Zephyr

Senior Member
really you will get much more mileage out of damaging his credibility than persuing actual perjury charges
 

crhsah

Member
Yes, we did just have a court ruling today. I was found guilty of contempt for refusing to drop him off for visitation. This is the first time it has happened in 5 years. He has a large dog which was tackling him and targeting his eyes. On three separate occasions. I sent an express letter to ask him to keep the dog up until trained. Sent it express so that we could resolve before next visitation. No response. Brought him to child exchange and asked him to agree to keep the child safe. Refused. Sent a letter requesting mediation. ignored. Sent several more letters requesting that the child be kept safe and asking why he had stopped telephoning our son. No response. Just took me to court.

I wouldn't have withheld if I didn't truly believe my son was in danger of facial scarring and blindness. If he would have so much as acknowledged that there was a problem which he intended to correct.

He truly does lie and manipulate more than most people tell the truth. So, for the past 2 years I have been trying to limit all communiction to written. He is not happy about it, since very little of what he would be proud to have seen by a judge. He has threatened to sue for harrassment. There are only 60 letters from the past 2 years. They are all polite, none threatening. Just reminding him when he is in breach of the parenting plan, letters to confirm his refusals of extra days, letters requesting payment for medical bills and the like...

What do I do now with 2 years of letters which demonstrate he is not the victmized Daddy of the year he claims?
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
Yes, we did just have a court ruling today. I was found guilty of contempt for refusing to drop him off for visitation. This is the first time it has happened in 5 years. He has a large dog which was tackling him and targeting his eyes. On three separate occasions. I sent an express letter to ask him to keep the dog up until trained. Sent it express so that we could resolve before next visitation. No response. Brought him to child exchange and asked him to agree to keep the child safe. Refused. Sent a letter requesting mediation. ignored. Sent several more letters requesting that the child be kept safe and asking why he had stopped telephoning our son. No response. Just took me to court.

I wouldn't have withheld if I didn't truly believe my son was in danger of facial scarring and blindness. If he would have so much as acknowledged that there was a problem which he intended to correct.

He truly does lie and manipulate more than most people tell the truth. So, for the past 2 years I have been trying to limit all communiction to written. He is not happy about it, since very little of what he would be proud to have seen by a judge. He has threatened to sue for harrassment. There are only 60 letters from the past 2 years. They are all polite, none threatening. Just reminding him when he is in breach of the parenting plan, letters to confirm his refusals of extra days, letters requesting payment for medical bills and the like...

What do I do now with 2 years of letters which demonstrate he is not the victmized Daddy of the year he claims?
Nothing now, the judge has already ruled. However keep those letters in your file, just in case.

You did deny visitation. The judge had no choice but to find that you were in contempt.
 
Nothing now, the judge has already ruled. However keep those letters in your file, just in case.

You did deny visitation. The judge had no choice but to find that you were in contempt.
Actually here in WA, if a parent withholds a child because they reasonably believe the child would be in danger, they can usually get out of a contempt charge. The judge must not have felt that OP had reasonable concerns about the dog. Likely he felt OP was grasping at straws and that OP had no reasonable basis to assume the dog was a danger.

OP, does the dog have a history of having ever hurt someone? If not you don't get to summarily determine that the dog is a danger, letter or no letter. The court assumes dad is not going to put the child in danger with a pet. The fact that you did this does speak to dad's concerns of alienation. Not saying that is what you are doing, but watch it.

This is your first contempt charge, get one more and you may very well lose custody. It only takes two charges of contempt to give dad the "change in circumstance" he may be hoping for to take you back to court for primary custody.
 

crhsah

Member
I know now that the judge had no choice to find me in contempt. I did withold him. But I thought it was necessary to protect my child. The law is the law and I have to take my lumps.

The dog is under the age of one and has no vicious tendencies to my knowledge. He just sounds as if he is playing in an aggressive manner. He is making intentional repeated target of my child's eyes. On three occasions, it has completely reddened the entire upper and lower eyelids, with scratch marks right across the eye. IE, if my son's eyes were not closed, it would have been the eyes themselves.

I know that he judge would not have any reason to believe that the father would intentionally permit harm to come to the child, but I do. He has had 3 dogs and 2 have them have been destroyed for attacking people. The third, which used to attack me froze to death. He never shed a tear. In fact, made jokes while the rest of us were crying at the loss of one of them.

When the father was 8, his mother killed his father. My ex admits that all of their fights were over him. He told me that when he got the news, his sister and brother cried, but he didn't think anything other than, "good, it's over."

In fact, with my knowledge of this person, I am actually in fear that I have put my child at risk. My ex is extremely sneaky and vindictive. After my son told me about the attacks, he stopped his nightly phone calls for 3 weeks. But to talk to him, butter wouldn't melt in his mouth. I truly wonder if my child wouldn't have been better off with my having custody but being blinded rather than in with eyesight in the custody of someone this vindictive and cruel.
 

wileybunch

Senior Member
I know now that the judge had no choice to find me in contempt. I did withold him. But I thought it was necessary to protect my child. The law is the law and I have to take my lumps.
Withholding when you feel there's a true emergency *coupled* with filing for an emergency order for that situation would have kept you on the right side of the law vs. making the decision unilaterally and your EX having to be the one that filed with the court.
 
I know now that the judge had no choice to find me in contempt. I did withold him. But I thought it was necessary to protect my child. The law is the law and I have to take my lumps.

The dog is under the age of one and has no vicious tendencies to my knowledge. He just sounds as if he is playing in an aggressive manner. He is making intentional repeated target of my child's eyes. On three occasions, it has completely reddened the entire upper and lower eyelids, with scratch marks right across the eye. IE, if my son's eyes were not closed, it would have been the eyes themselves.

I know that he judge would not have any reason to believe that the father would intentionally permit harm to come to the child, but I do. He has had 3 dogs and 2 have them have been destroyed for attacking people. The third, which used to attack me froze to death. He never shed a tear. In fact, made jokes while the rest of us were crying at the loss of one of them.

When the father was 8, his mother killed his father. My ex admits that all of their fights were over him. He told me that when he got the news, his sister and brother cried, but he didn't think anything other than, "good, it's over."

In fact, with my knowledge of this person, I am actually in fear that I have put my child at risk. My ex is extremely sneaky and vindictive. After my son told me about the attacks, he stopped his nightly phone calls for 3 weeks. But to talk to him, butter wouldn't melt in his mouth. I truly wonder if my child wouldn't have been better off with my having custody but being blinded rather than in with eyesight in the custody of someone this vindictive and cruel.
He sounds a lot like my X, scary if your not on his good side!
 

crhsah

Member
Yep...quite sure that he is a nut job. I found myself working with his cousin. (Interesting in that they are both from a very small town thousands of miles away) When I asked her about his childhood...you would think that SHE was the ex...she ranted for 3 HOURS!!! Said that whenever the relatives get together and his name comes up...the standing joke is to question if anyone has killed him yet.

But, even if he is Charles Manson, my son has a right to know his father and be involved in his life.

Problem is, I have not found the book I have been looking for...it would be titled something like: "How To Live a Normal Life When Your Ex Is a Psycho: 1,000 tips for every occasion."

I'm only one normal human and I don't always have the best answer to everything. I don't know if there is one. I just try and do the best I can and hope I don't make decisions I regret...while dealing with someone who is trying to paint me as out to get him.
 

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