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  1. #1
    lillisav03 is offline Junior Member
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    step mother rights

    What is the name of your state? texas
    my question to you is: what legal rights do stepmoms have in the stae of texas? i am a divorced mom of two boys. thier dad has remarried to a very interfering woman. she is and has tried to get things changed at schools and sports. i am the one who has enrolled them in the schools and sports ,not her or let alone their father. she has told people in front of me, shes their mom, and has told the schools that i live out of town. my exhusband and i have joint custody,i being the primary. the boys live with me..i dont have do deal with her do i? she doesnt have legal rights to my kids does she? i have delt with the chools and they know that i am here and that the boys are 95% of the time with me. this step mom has repeatly tried to talk and "be my friend" , but i dont want anything to do with her. i have told her over and over that if i need anything or if their dad needs anything he can call me and i will call him. we are their parents. she wont let go. i may sound like the "angry" ex-wife that dosent want to get along with the "new" wife, but im not. i have had one to many confrintations with this woman, and i dont trust her or anyone who talks bad about me. what advise does anyone give? is there anything i can do? even their dad is saying she is their mom.am i wrong for saying that i should only have to deal with their dad?
  2. #2
    BelizeBreeze is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by lillisav03 View Post
    What is the name of your state? texas
    my question to you is: what legal rights do stepmoms have in the stae of texas?
    The same rights as in all other states.
    i am a divorced mom of two boys. thier dad has remarried to a very interfering woman. she is and has tried to get things changed at schools and sports. i am the one who has enrolled them in the schools and sports ,not her or let alone their father. she has told people in front of me, shes their mom, and has told the schools that i live out of town. my exhusband and i have joint custody,i being the primary. the boys live with me..i dont have do deal with her do i?
    You 'have' to deal with her the same as any stranger.
    she doesnt have legal rights to my kids does she?
    Based on the facts so far presented, no
    i have delt with the chools and they know that i am here and that the boys are 95% of the time with me. this step mom has repeatly tried to talk and "be my friend" , but i dont want anything to do with her. i have told her over and over that if i need anything or if their dad needs anything he can call me and i will call him. we are their parents. she wont let go. i may sound like the "angry" ex-wife that dosent want to get along with the "new" wife, but im not. i have had one to many confrintations with this woman, and i dont trust her or anyone who talks bad about me. what advise does anyone give? is there anything i can do? even their dad is saying she is their mom.am i wrong for saying that i should only have to deal with their dad?
    The very FIRST thing you do is to inform the school that this woman has absolutely no rights whatsoever to information and/or access to your children. Then you can tell your ex that if she does not immediately cease and desist that you will file for a peace warrant against the idiot forcing her to stay away from the children, their school and any other place they may be.

    Then take the idiot out back and give her one right between the eyes.
  3. #3
    momofrose is offline Senior Member
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    Even if you only had your kids 20% of the time, the step-mother has no legal rights whatsoever to your children.

    I ran into the same thing with my daughter's step mom in that she was representing herself as her mother, signing parental permission slips, and all of that.

    I finally has my attorney send a letter to my ex (and his attorney) and advised him that she is a "legal stranger" and is not to be acting as her mother in a personal or a legal fashion, and that it is to cease and desist or we would bring him back to court.

    Well, it stopped immediately. I would suggest you might try the same thing. Courts do not look fondly at a step moms trying to ake the place of the mom.

    Good Luck
  4. #4
    lillisav03 is offline Junior Member
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    trust me sometimes that what i want to do,but i havre to be the better adult and better person. thanks though. that was the classic answer. can you send me the rights for step parnets for all the states? i have no idea about them
  5. #5
    lillisav03 is offline Junior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by momofrose View Post
    Even if you only had your kids 20% of the time, the step-mother has no legal rights whatsoever to your children.

    I ran into the same thing with my daughter's step mom in that she was representing herself as her mother, signing parental permission slips, and all of that.

    I finally has my attorney send a letter to my ex (and his attorney) and advised him that she is a "legal stranger" and is not to be acting as her mother in a personal or a legal fashion, and that it is to cease and desist or we would bring him back to court.

    Well, it stopped immediately. I would suggest you might try the same thing. Courts do not look fondly at a step moms trying to ake the place of the mom.

    Good Luck
    thank you. i am not feeling so alone now
  6. #6
    BelizeBreeze is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by lillisav03 View Post
    trust me sometimes that what i want to do,but i havre to be the better adult and better person. thanks though. that was the classic answer. can you send me the rights for step parnets for all the states? i have no idea about them
    The rights of stepparents in all 50 states and the District of Columbia can be found between the <> marks on this page:

    <
























    >
  7. #7
    lillisav03 is offline Junior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by BelizeBreeze View Post
    The rights of stepparents in all 50 states and the District of Columbia can be found between the <> marks on this page:

    <
























    >
    i think i got it. none
  8. #8
    demartian is offline Member
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    What you allow

    Any person can request information about your child in school and how they are doing. It is up to you to state who can and can not get/give information.

    For instance, there are cases where the step-parent can sign for things and so forth because they have been given permission to by the actual parent or parents. You could give a day care provider the very same permission and sometimes you need to, but that is as far as it goes.
  9. #9
    ceara19 is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by lillisav03 View Post
    trust me sometimes that what i want to do,but i havre to be the better adult and better person. thanks though. that was the classic answer. can you send me the rights for step parnets for all the states? i have no idea about them
    If you want to be the "better adult" then you need to suck it up and try to at the very least get along with the woman. Although she has no LEGAL rights whatsoever, she is still a part of their actual lives, like it or not. The animosity that you obviously have towards her is not going to help your kids.
  10. #10
    ceara19 is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by demartian View Post
    Any person can request information about your child in school and how they are doing. It is up to you to state who can and can not get/give information.

    For instance, there are cases where the step-parent can sign for things and so forth because they have been given permission to by the actual parent or parents. You could give a day care provider the very same permission and sometimes you need to, but that is as far as it goes.
    Plus, since dad has joint legal custody, HE has just as much right as the OP does when it comes to informing the school who can and can't have access to certain information. If HE gave his wife permission and mom changes it, dad can just change it right back. The last thing any parent wants to do is try and put the SCHOOL in the middle.

    The OP would have to get a court order to stop dad from allowing his wife to have certain rights and that will most likely NOT happen.
  11. #11
    momofrose is offline Senior Member
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    Not to speak for the OP BUT I think the point was that the step mom was portraying herself as the mom...not the fact that she was requesting information.

    Sure she should try and get along, but since this is a legal question - she was given the legal answer..step parents have ZERO legal rights,

    D
  12. #12
    ceara19 is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by momofrose View Post
    Not to speak for the OP BUT I think the point was that the step mom was portraying herself as the mom...not the fact that she was requesting information.

    Sure she should try and get along, but since this is a legal question - she was given the legal answer..step parents have ZERO legal rights,

    D
    The SM was overstepping her bounds by trying to make CHANGES with the school, however, if DAD gave her the OK to do so, she broke no actual laws.

    Maybe if the OP tried to "play nice", SM would stop being so overbearing. The fact is, DAD has joint custody and he has the right to allow his wife to deal with the school. The only way to change that is to go back to court. In all likelihood, dad would be told to have his wife back-off "or else". That's AFTER the OP spends a few thousand dollars on legal fees and court costs. If dad continues to allow his wife to interfere, then it would take ANOTHER trip to court and MORE money.

    If the problem can be solved by ACTING like the "better adult" that she is claiming to be, why go through all of the expense and drama of court?
  13. #13
    momofrose is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by ceara19 View Post
    The SM was overstepping her bounds by trying to make CHANGES with the school, however, if DAD gave her the OK to do so, she broke no actual laws.

    Maybe if the OP tried to "play nice", SM would stop being so overbearing. The fact is, DAD has joint custody and he has the right to allow his wife to deal with the school. The only way to change that is to go back to court. In all likelihood, dad would be told to have his wife back-off "or else". That's AFTER the OP spends a few thousand dollars on legal fees and court costs. If dad continues to allow his wife to interfere, then it would take ANOTHER trip to court and MORE money.

    If the problem can be solved by ACTING like the "better adult" that she is claiming to be, why go through all of the expense and drama of court?

    I can tell you from personal experience that the nicer I was to the SM the more she took full advantage to the point where she was signing documents and permissions lips as my daighter's mother. Whatever legal rights the dad allows, he can not allow the SM to sign documents or portray herself as the child's mother.

    I did not have to take my ex back to court, but did have the atty send a letter and it all stopped.

    Sure the SM still deal with the school - and that's fine with me - as long as she knows her place.

    D
  14. #14
    jbowman is offline Senior Member
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    Ok so I have a question then.... What if there are situations where I feel my son is not in a healthy environment because of the step mother. My son is 11. A year and a half ago, she took him to the gyno with her IN THE ROOM. I had no idea until he came home crying. He said "i didnt mean to look mama, but I couldnt help it". He was going thru early puberty and this caused a tremendous amount of guilt for him. Another instance is when she was angry and threw a glass at my ex and almost hit my son. He came home and told me about this also. If this happened with a day care provider or someone similar, I would have wanted to press charges or something. But with her, I can do nothing.

    She is also the one that writes the child support checks with "step-sons support" written in the memo. She has actually sent me a check in the mail for $2.00 when the original check was a couple dollars short. Talk about disrespectful!!! There are many other instances. She does nothing to keep the peace.

    Is there anything that can be done in those kinds of situations?
  15. #15
    stealth2 is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by jbowman View Post
    Ok so I have a question then.... What if there are situations where I feel my son is not in a healthy environment because of the step mother. My son is 11. A year and a half ago, she took him to the gyno with her IN THE ROOM. I had no idea until he came home crying. He said "i didnt mean to look mama, but I couldnt help it". He was going thru early puberty and this caused a tremendous amount of guilt for him. Another instance is when she was angry and threw a glass at my ex and almost hit my son. He came home and told me about this also. If this happened with a day care provider or someone similar, I would have wanted to press charges or something. But with her, I can do nothing.

    She is also the one that writes the child support checks with "step-sons support" written in the memo. She has actually sent me a check in the mail for $2.00 when the original check was a couple dollars short. Talk about disrespectful!!! There are many other instances. She does nothing to keep the peace.

    Is there anything that can be done in those kinds of situations?
    You should start a separate thread for this.

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