stepmom causing trouble

[naenae]

What is the name of your state? south carolina I have a 6yr old son that lives with his father. His father has custody we agreed to it during mediation. I have some questions. His father is married. I tried to call lastnight to ask what size shoe my son needed because i wanted to buy him some. Now i do pay child support and i don't buy his things that often. Anyways no one picked the phone up, i just left message. His wife called back and said what is it well i just asked to speak to my son's father. she said no so i left it at that. We don't get along i tried but she is difficult that's why i didn't ask her. But meanwhile she texted me and asked me not to call just text.I texted back and said i have the right to call.She said yes you do your son not my husband.Iasked her not to text me again she continued just saying things like call at your specified time you asked for in court.Which i don't have a problem with. But is she allowed not to let me speak to my childs father about my son.She always call me. In the past she called and said my son didn't want to come on his schedled weekend and don't waste my gas.We have a court date for this contempt.But what can i do if anything because she is acting like i have to deal with her when i don't and i have told her before i don't. She never lets me speak to my son's fatherabout anything.What is the name of your state?

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state? south carolina I have a 6yr old son that lives with his father. His father has custody we agreed to it during mediation. I have some questions. His father is married. I tried to call lastnight to ask what size shoe my son needed because i wanted to buy him some. Now i do pay child support and i don't buy his things that often. Anyways no one picked the phone up, i just left message. His wife called back and said what is it well i just asked to speak to my son's father. she said no so i left it at that. We don't get along i tried but she is difficult that's why i didn't ask her. But meanwhile she texted me and asked me not to call just text.I texted back and said i have the right to call.She said yes you do your son not my husband.Iasked her not to text me again she continued just saying things like call at your specified time you asked for in court.Which i don't have a problem with. But is she allowed not to let me speak to my childs father about my son.She always call me. In the past she called and said my son didn't want to come on his schedled weekend and don't waste my gas.We have a court date for this contempt.But what can i do if anything because she is acting like i have to deal with her when i don't and i have told her before i don't. She never lets me speak to my son's fatherabout anything.What is the name of your state?

Make sure that you address this when you are in court on the contempt case. I suspect that the judge will make it clear that dad cannot allow his wife to interfere in co-parenting issues and cannot prohibit communication between you and dad regarding the child. This is one of those things that judges generally get seriously grumpy about, and is one of the reasons why we make it so clear to stepparents on these forums, that they need to watch their step.

 

[stealth2]

Generally judges do get grumpy about this sort of thing (but not always - like in my situation). Hopefully they'll put an end to it for you.

As for the contempt - did you actually try to exercise your visitation? Or did you simply accept what stepmom said and not try to get your son? If the latter - it likely will not be considered contempt.

 

[naenae]

I did go over to his house anyway and they weren't there. I called the cell no answer.This has happened twice second time i took a witness.

 

[wileybunch]

Is home the only tel # you have for Dad? Do you have a work or cell #?
It may well be that Dad didn't want to talk to you and he doesn't have to. It's kinda hard if someone else answers the phone b/c it's not like you can leave a message like with VM. Stepmom isn't necessarily overstepping if Dad didn't want to talk to you. You should tell her that if he wants you to text only, that needs to come from him and whether or not that's acceptable will have to be determined. Difficult to share legal custody in the size of text message snippets (hint hint to CP).

 

[Zephyr]

nae- please enable your pm's in your user cp in the peach colored band towards the top of the screen

 

[naenae]

I enabled my pm's.I do have the work number he never gave the house number like the order stated.But one of the text said we won't be there.I did call him days later left message about my girls b-day and to let him know i would be picking my son up because i am allowed to for 2 hours.Well he wasn't there nor did they answer i left message said i was going to police station to file complaint.The wife called back when i was showering left message and said do what you have to do and don't call this phone again.

 

[NotClueless]

While in court, you may want to have the judge state no third party interference, and that he be ordered to give you phone numbers that you can contact him with.

 

[wileybunch]

I enabled my pm's.I do have the work number he never gave the house number like the order stated.But one of the text said we won't be there.I did call him days later left message about my girls b-day and to let him know i would be picking my son up because i am allowed to for 2 hours.Well he wasn't there nor did they answer i left message said i was going to police station to file complaint.The wife called back when i was showering left message and said do what you have to do and don't call this phone again.

Oh, just playing games then. Do you send him a letter each time he violates the court order? deltabravo has good advice and a form letter to customize for your situation.

http://www.deltabravo.net/custody/missed-visit.php

Don't allow this to continue much before filing a contempt motion.

 

[Ohiogal]

Did you ever go to the pickup to get your child?

 

[spoofer]

Does your ex not want you to call? Are you sure you aren't harassing them? If she lives in the home she has a right to hang up on your or decide not to give the phone to your husband. But I'm sure if you complain a Judge will make her stop interfering.

 

[Ohiogal]

Does your ex not want you to call? Are you sure you aren't harassing them?

Ex cannot prohibit her from calling about her child. He does not have that right. ONE OF HIS RESPONSIBILITIES is to foster a relationship between the child and the NCP (mom). Spoofer you really need to learn the law and understand it before you post. You have posted incorrect and illegal information and then just asked completely irrelevant questions. If you continue, you will be reported. And you most likely will be banned.

 

[spoofer]

Ex cannot prohibit her from calling about her child. He does not have that right. ONE OF HIS RESPONSIBILITIES is to foster a relationship between the child and the NCP (mom). Spoofer you really need to learn the law and understand it before you post. You have posted incorrect and illegal information and then just asked completely irrelevant questions. If you continue, you will be reported. And you most likely will be banned.

She could be harassing them. It happens all the time. If the step mom wants to hang up the phone there's not much anyone can do.

 

[stealth2]

OG... did you really expect a different reply from... an interfering stepmom?

 

[wileybunch]

OG... did you really expect a different reply from... an interfering stepmom?

Without additional information, spoofer does have a point. Dad doesn't have to talk to Mom *right that moment* just because Mom wants to talk and it is a valid question, at least, to ask if it could be perceived as harassment -- for example, has this been an issue in court already and OP was told to use another form of communication and not phone? Remember our issue with husband's ex during holiday period? And his ex was told by FC judge several years back to use email as primary means and to stop calling husband because she was off the hook with it.

However, just before spoofer's post is another one from OP that sheds more light that Dad/wife are also withholding child on her parenting times so the not wanting to talk to her probably has more to do with the fact they are just trying to shut her out completely vs. a "not now" sorta thing.