moveslikejagger
Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Indiana
Background:
My daughter's dad and I split up when I was 14 weeks pregnant. Never married. Met my now husband 1 month later, dated for 7 years been married for 1.
My daughter is 7 (almost 8) and her dad has not called/seen her in almost a year(9 weeks short). This is the second time in her life he has stopped all communication. The first was for 9 months when she was 4 months old until she was 13 months old. From late 2006-Oct 2012 he exercised his visitation and saw her on most of his weekends. Our daughter had a hard time bonding with him and never wanted to see her dad, but I would take her every weekend and put her in the car kicking and screaming because I knew that's what I had to do and I wanted them to have a relationship. As she got older it only continued to get worse. He would see her on his weekends, but he wasn't real involved in any other aspects of her life..seldom came to sporting activities, didn't show up to kindergarten graduation, wasn't present for school activities, never picked her up or dropped her off his weekends..it was always his mom, and overall just didn't show a real interest in her outside of his every other weekend visitation. On the last weekend that he saw her in October he was there to pick her up and our daughter threw a fit said some terrible things like "he is going to kill me" and I reacted emotionally and told him I was taking her home. I put her in my car and he opened her door and told her that he would take me to court and she would have to live with him since I was denying him visitation. He has never contacted her again. All of my contact information has stayed the same.
It's now 9 weeks short of a year and he has had no communication with her. She has a real connection with my husband and always had. She does not call him dad, but she writes his last name on all of her school papers and was not happy when I would not register her for school this year with his last name. For all of her life he has taken up the slack where her dad was not involved. If her dad does go for a year without any significant contact with his daughter the way I understand Indiana law is that I would be able to file for my husband to adopt my daughter without her dads consent, but that he would be given 30 days to contest the adoption. If he does contest and we go before a judge what are my chances of a judge ruling that my husband can adopt her? Of course, as a mother, I want stability for my daughter and for her to not have to worry when/if her dad will be in her life and when he will opt out of being a parent again. It's hard for me to not look at this from an emotional standpoint. Any advice would be appreciated. Thank you
Background:
My daughter's dad and I split up when I was 14 weeks pregnant. Never married. Met my now husband 1 month later, dated for 7 years been married for 1.
My daughter is 7 (almost 8) and her dad has not called/seen her in almost a year(9 weeks short). This is the second time in her life he has stopped all communication. The first was for 9 months when she was 4 months old until she was 13 months old. From late 2006-Oct 2012 he exercised his visitation and saw her on most of his weekends. Our daughter had a hard time bonding with him and never wanted to see her dad, but I would take her every weekend and put her in the car kicking and screaming because I knew that's what I had to do and I wanted them to have a relationship. As she got older it only continued to get worse. He would see her on his weekends, but he wasn't real involved in any other aspects of her life..seldom came to sporting activities, didn't show up to kindergarten graduation, wasn't present for school activities, never picked her up or dropped her off his weekends..it was always his mom, and overall just didn't show a real interest in her outside of his every other weekend visitation. On the last weekend that he saw her in October he was there to pick her up and our daughter threw a fit said some terrible things like "he is going to kill me" and I reacted emotionally and told him I was taking her home. I put her in my car and he opened her door and told her that he would take me to court and she would have to live with him since I was denying him visitation. He has never contacted her again. All of my contact information has stayed the same.
It's now 9 weeks short of a year and he has had no communication with her. She has a real connection with my husband and always had. She does not call him dad, but she writes his last name on all of her school papers and was not happy when I would not register her for school this year with his last name. For all of her life he has taken up the slack where her dad was not involved. If her dad does go for a year without any significant contact with his daughter the way I understand Indiana law is that I would be able to file for my husband to adopt my daughter without her dads consent, but that he would be given 30 days to contest the adoption. If he does contest and we go before a judge what are my chances of a judge ruling that my husband can adopt her? Of course, as a mother, I want stability for my daughter and for her to not have to worry when/if her dad will be in her life and when he will opt out of being a parent again. It's hard for me to not look at this from an emotional standpoint. Any advice would be appreciated. Thank you