Tattoos & Piercing

[diz]

What is the name of your state? CA - Can one parent get child tattoo/piercing without the other parents consent?

Both have joint legal custody with varied/non scheduled visitation.

Daughter (1 week away from 17) lives with mom. Son (15) lives with father. Son has told father that mother is going to take daughter to Las Vegas to get a tattoo & that she'll take the son and get his lip pierced if dad writes a letter of consent.

1) Can mother get daughter tattoo & piercing without father's consent even though daughter lives with mother?
2) What recourse does father have?
3) If son gets lip pierced and comes home (son has been told NO piercing period) and refuses to take out, what are recourses? If we call the police to witness that we are taking it out without "abusing" him (if holding around torso is needed) if police being there "scare" son into complying but if not to protect us from being accused of abusing child & protect us from him fighting/abusing us while taking piercing out.


It's hard to believe that it's come down to parents having to protect themselves against the kids crying abuse when abuse isn't happening and kids won't listen & when parent tries to discipline then they get CPS called on them.

 

[ceara19]

What is the name of your state? CA - Can one parent get child tattoo/piercing without the other parents consent?

Both have joint legal custody with varied/non scheduled visitation.

Daughter (1 week away from 17) lives with mom. Son (15) lives with father. Son has told father that mother is going to take daughter to Las Vegas to get a tattoo & that she'll take the son and get his lip pierced if dad writes a letter of consent.

1) Can mother get daughter tattoo & piercing without father's consent even though daughter lives with mother?
2) What recourse does father have?
3) If son gets lip pierced and comes home (son has been told NO piercing period) and refuses to take out, what are recourses? If we call the police to witness that we are taking it out without "abusing" him (if holding around torso is needed) if police being there "scare" son into complying but if not to protect us from being accused of abusing child & protect us from him fighting/abusing us while taking piercing out.


It's hard to believe that it's come down to parents having to protect themselves against the kids crying abuse when abuse isn't happening and kids won't listen & when parent tries to discipline then they get CPS called on them.

I don't even think it's LEGAL to give a minor a tattoo in Vegas with BOTH parents consent. I don't have any general problems with tattoos or piercings, I have 2 myself. But I was almost 30 before I got the first one. A parent really shouldn't allow the child to do something as permanent as a tattoo or cosmetic surgery for that matter. As far as piercings, at least they are temporary. The hole will close if the jewelry is taken out.

 

[Ohiogal]

What is the name of your state? CA - Can one parent get child tattoo/piercing without the other parents consent?

Both have joint legal custody with varied/non scheduled visitation.

Daughter (1 week away from 17) lives with mom. Son (15) lives with father. Son has told father that mother is going to take daughter to Las Vegas to get a tattoo & that she'll take the son and get his lip pierced if dad writes a letter of consent.

1) Can mother get daughter tattoo & piercing without father's consent even though daughter lives with mother?

From the Southern Nevada Health District
Regulations Governing the Sanitation of
Body Piercing Establishments
4.1 Patrons: No person shall perform any body piercing procedure upon a person under the age of 18 years without the written consent and proper identification of a parent, custodial parent or guardian, or under the direct supervision of a physician.

Any procedure performed on a minor must be done in the presence of a parent or guardian. Nothing in this section is intended to require a technician to perform any body piercing procedure on a person under 18 years of age with parental or guardian consent.

4.1.1 Age of all patrons must be verified via picture identification and documented prior to the procedure being performed.

4.1.2 Picture identification of all patrons 21 years of age or younger must be photocopied and kept with the patron's paperwork.

So yes your wife can give permission for your daughter to get pierced or tattooed.



2) What recourse does father have?

Legally, your ex has a right to do this unless your court order specifically forbids it. She is being nice by saying you have to give son written consent. You can forbid your children to wear body piercings in your house and establish the rules of your house.

3) If son gets lip pierced and comes home (son has been told NO piercing period) and refuses to take out, what are recourses? If we call the police to witness that we are taking it out without "abusing" him (if holding around torso is needed) if police being there "scare" son into complying but if not to protect us from being accused of abusing child & protect us from him fighting/abusing us while taking piercing out.

If you hold your child down to take a piercing out that was legally put in to his lip then you may actually be breaking the law and it wouldn't look too good for you if the police were witnesses. .

It's hard to believe that it's come down to parents having to protect themselves against the kids crying abuse when abuse isn't happening and kids won't listen & when parent tries to discipline then they get CPS called on them.

Your problem is you need to discuss this with your ex and find out why she believes she should allow them get piercings and tattoos at this juncture. You and her are the parents. You need to communicate with her. She is also their parent and has a right to make decisions. Your decisions do not supercede hers and vice versa. Also talk to you son and daughter about why they want piercings/tattoos. Is it rebellion? What do they want tattooed? Piercings grow closed and are easy to remedy if your son outgrows it. They can also be removed for job interviews and what not. If he changes his mind the hole will go bye bye eventually. tattoos are more difficult to remove. Where is it going to be? How big does your daughter want it. Is it something discreet? Definitely discuss these things with your ex and your children.

 

[Ohiogal]

Oh and another thing: tattooing of a minor in California is illegal. So if there is something in your court order as to parenting decisions or disputes fall under California law that may give you legal basis to fight the tattoo.

 

[casa]

Oh and another thing: tattooing of a minor in California is illegal. So if there is something in your court order as to parenting decisions or disputes fall under California law that may give you legal basis to fight the tattoo.

However, piercing a minor in CA is not illegal as long as a parent is with the minor & signs the consent form.

 

[rmet4nzkx]

The quickest solution might be to get a domestic violence restraining order to prevent the tatto and piercing.

 

[diz]

Talking with ex wife most likely won't go well. IF she evens answers the phone, she'll hang up if she doesn't like/agree with what's being said. It's best if the least talking is done.

Mother is ok with kids doing all piercings & such & basically says they live with me...there's nothing you can do.

Son lived with mom until CPS pulled him out (whole other issue) and he pierced & started guaging his ear 3 times all ending with infections and now his lobe is almost entirely scar tissue. We have also seen teens/young adults with facial piercing that have scared even after taken out for some time. Guaging is forever loose skin.

Kids want is "because it's cool" and "want to express themselves". We've told them after they turn 18 they can do it. Hopefully to give them time to mature before doing something they'll regret.

*If you hold your child down to take a piercing out that was legally put in to his lip then you may actually be breaking the law and it wouldn't look too good for you if the police were witnesses. .
*You can forbid your children to wear body piercings in your house and establish the rules of your house.

If you forbid your children to wear body piercings in your house and they refuse to take them out then what??? The kids can basically tell you to F off and you can't do anything? The rules are NO piercings and we've told them that they'll have to take them out if they do it. If they say NO I'm not following your rules then what? Take away their phone etc? They're still running around with something that we have said no to so basically they're getting away with disobeying.

We were wondernig if the police were there then they would be our witness that we weren't abusing him just enforcing our rule and if he fights or anything happens it's not our butts if he crys abuse.

 

[Ohiogal]

Talking with ex wife most likely won't go well. IF she evens answers the phone, she'll hang up if she doesn't like/agree with what's being said. It's best if the least talking is done.

Mother is ok with kids doing all piercings & such & basically says they live with me...there's nothing you can do.

Son lived with mom until CPS pulled him out (whole other issue) and he pierced & started guaging his ear 3 times all ending with infections and now his lobe is almost entirely scar tissue. We have also seen teens/young adults with facial piercing that have scared even after taken out for some time. Guaging is forever loose skin.

Kids want is "because it's cool" and "want to express themselves". We've told them after they turn 18 they can do it. Hopefully to give them time to mature before doing something they'll regret.

*If you hold your child down to take a piercing out that was legally put in to his lip then you may actually be breaking the law and it wouldn't look too good for you if the police were witnesses. .
*You can forbid your children to wear body piercings in your house and establish the rules of your house.

If you forbid your children to wear body piercings in your house and they refuse to take them out then what??? The kids can basically tell you to F off and you can't do anything? The rules are NO piercings and we've told them that they'll have to take them out if they do it. If they say NO I'm not following your rules then what? Take away their phone etc? They're still running around with something that we have said no to so basically they're getting away with disobeying.

We were wondernig if the police were there then they would be our witness that we weren't abusing him just enforcing our rule and if he fights or anything happens it's not our butts if he crys abuse.

The police are not referees though. And if it is not illegal for them to have it then they won't do anything. Tattoos are illegal as I said. Another poster pointed out that piercings are not. You take away their phone, their electronic gizmos and what not. That is pretty much what you have to be able to work with.

 

[Ithildriel]

If you forbid your children to wear body piercings in your house and they refuse to take them out then what??? The kids can basically tell you to F off and you can't do anything? The rules are NO piercings and we've told them that they'll have to take them out if they do it. If they say NO I'm not following your rules then what? Take away their phone etc? They're still running around with something that we have said no to so basically they're getting away with disobeying.
QUOTE]

I guess that is one way to look at it, or you could look at it as they are sitting in their room with no t.v., no computer, no video games, no phone, no leaving the house except for school, with a piercing in their lip. I would think after awhile looking at the walls is going to get old.

 

[Just Blue]

If you forbid your children to wear body piercings in your house and they refuse to take them out then what??? The kids can basically tell you to F off and you can't do anything? The rules are NO piercings and we've told them that they'll have to take them out if they do it. If they say NO I'm not following your rules then what? Take away their phone etc? They're still running around with something that we have said no to so basically they're getting away with disobeying.
QUOTE]

I guess that is one way to look at it, or you could look at it as they are sitting in their room with no t.v., no computer, no video games, no phone, no leaving the house except for school, with a piercing in their lip. I would think after awhile looking at the walls is going to get old.

What she said...!!

Also I want to Thank God, Budda, Mohammad, Isis...or what ever higher power that is out there for my daughter...She wanted a belly ring when she was 13...I told her when she turned 16 and with her own money she could get it...She has been 16 since October and no piercings...She now thinks its not worth the $$...I love my daughter...she's a good kid...

 

[ceara19]

I guess that is one way to look at it, or you could look at it as they are sitting in their room with no t.v., no computer, no video games, no phone, no leaving the house except for school, with a piercing in their lip. I would think after awhile looking at the walls is going to get old.

Many schools don't allow the students to have visible piercings or tattoos. Even if it is illegal for the parent/s to physically remove it, the school can refuse admittance until the child removes or covers the offending body alteration. If the child continues to refuse to remove the item, the school can and will report the child as a truant. Then a JUDGE can order it removed. If the child still refuses to comply, a few weeks at a residential juvenile facility may change their mind.

 

[ceara19]

[/U][/B]

What she said...!!

Also I want to Thank God, Budda, Mohammad, Isis...or what ever higher power that is out there for my daughter...She wanted a belly ring when she was 13...I told her when she turned 16 and with her own money she could get it...She has been 16 since October and no piercings...She now thinks its not worth the $$...I love my daughter...she's a good kid...

I think 18 is still too young for a person to get a tattoo. As a teenager, they usually can't grasp the concept of PERMANENT. I don't think just anyone should be allowed to become a parent just because they are physically able to have a child either, but I'm pretty sure that MY opinion hasn't had much of an effect on those in question.

 

[Ohiogal]

I think 18 is still too young for a person to get a tattoo. As a teenager, they usually can't grasp the concept of PERMANENT. I don't think just anyone should be allowed to become a parent just because they are physically able to have a child either, but I'm pretty sure that MY opinion hasn't had much of an effect on those in question.

Ummm... regarding the having a child part, yeah i dont think your opinion has had much effect. Too bad.