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Tucson/Christmas

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magnus2011

Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? az
I work 150 miles away, during the week and half a day on Saturdays. Last school year I worked most days 7:30 AM to 9:30 PM most days and half a day on saturdays. So I have not been able to exercise my parenting privileges - which is Mondays and Wednesdays and every other weekend.

I get one week off for Christmas. It is the last week of the year. My ex scheduled to take the kids out of state that week. If I make them cancel I am the bad guy. But it is the ONLY week of the entire year I can exercise my full visitation.

What can and should I do? Christmas is hers this year.
 


Proserpina

Senior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? az
I work 150 miles away, during the week and half a day on Saturdays. Last school year I worked most days 7:30 AM to 9:30 PM most days and half a day on saturdays. So I have not been able to exercise my parenting privileges - which is Mondays and Wednesdays and every other weekend.

I get one week off for Christmas. It is the last week of the year. My ex scheduled to take the kids out of state that week. If I make them cancel I am the bad guy. But it is the ONLY week of the entire year I can exercise my full visitation.

What can and should I do? Christmas is hers this year.


This is really a personal decision, not a legal question.

You're absolutely entitled to take your visitation if it's not actually Christmas weekend (because Mom gets Christmas this year and that supersedes regular visitation).

But yes, you do stand the risk of being "the bad guy" if they have to cancel.

How long have you known about your time off, incidentally? It sounds as if Mom has had this arranged for at least a while and if she does need to cancel it's probably best she knows sooner rather than later.
 
This is just my opinion, since you didn't really ask a legal question. No matter what the reason, facts are facts, you have not been utilizing visitation, and that is YOUR CHOICE.

If I were your ex, or your kids, I'd be mighty irritated that dad finally decides to utilize visitation, when he decides he is able, and that costs a planned vacation. They are apparently scheduled to go out of town in 3 weeks, that is very short notice to cancel a trip.

Of course, if that is your scheduled time, it is your right to do so, but expect your kids to be irritated with you. "Dad finally decides to see us and we don't get to go to X".
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? az
I work 150 miles away, during the week and half a day on Saturdays. Last school year I worked most days 7:30 AM to 9:30 PM most days and half a day on saturdays. So I have not been able to exercise my parenting privileges - which is Mondays and Wednesdays and every other weekend.

I get one week off for Christmas. It is the last week of the year. My ex scheduled to take the kids out of state that week. If I make them cancel I am the bad guy. But it is the ONLY week of the entire year I can exercise my full visitation.

What can and should I do? Christmas is hers this year.
Is that week your week under the court orders? If not, what do your orders state regarding vacations and Christmas Break? Whether or not you CAN do anything depends on whether or not mom's vacation with the children violates the court orders. Whether or not you SHOULD do anything depends on what is in the best interest of your children.

Dad, per your other thread you are having trouble meeting your financial obligations as far as child and spousal support are concerned as well. Parenting time factors into child support calculations therefore the fact that you are not exercising your full visitation on a regular and consistant basis could result in a recalculation of your child support.

I will ask you the same question I asked you on your other thread? Why did you take a job so far away? Why couldn't you stay at your previous high school?
 

Silverplum

Senior Member
I will ask you the same question I asked you on your other thread? Why did you take a job so far away? Why couldn't you stay at your previous high school?
His post on the other thread explained that already. All it takes is READING, that very fundamental skill.
 

mistoffolees

Senior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? az
I work 150 miles away, during the week and half a day on Saturdays. Last school year I worked most days 7:30 AM to 9:30 PM most days and half a day on saturdays. So I have not been able to exercise my parenting privileges - which is Mondays and Wednesdays and every other weekend.

I get one week off for Christmas. It is the last week of the year. My ex scheduled to take the kids out of state that week. If I make them cancel I am the bad guy. But it is the ONLY week of the entire year I can exercise my full visitation.

What can and should I do? Christmas is hers this year.
If Christmas is hers, there's nothing you can do unless she is willing to voluntarily let you take it. You have to follow the court order - and your work schedule isn't going to be a reason for an emergency hearing.

I'm having a hard time understanding why you can't exercise at least some of your visitation. You work half day Saturday and not on Sunday. On leaving work Saturday, head right over to get the kids. Then bring them back Sunday evening. Sure, a lot of driving, but do you want to see your kids or not?

Now, what you CAN do is ask for a long distance visitation schedule to be implemented that might help to address the issue.

Meanwhile, she gets Christmas unless you can talk her into letting you have it. Whether you get ANY time with the kids at all depends on the exact wording of your custody order. Tell us what it says about the Christmas holiday and the dates of your vacation.
 

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