Bubbly, I was going to post something similar.
Granny, your daughter needs to get it through her head that FEW parents in todays economy can afford the luxury of being a SAHM. It's lovely if one can. However, those who can do this have generally saved, planned, and waited to start their families until they and their spouse are financially capable of giving up one income or education. Your daughter is not in that situation. (I wasn't either- adopting internationally takes a few bucks and strains the savings). She is a single HS KID who still needs a lot more school to be able to provide for this child, and herself over the long run. If biodad dropped dead in three years, or became permanantly disabled, how would she care for this child? She can't always plan on you being able to do this.
You need to stop giving her an excuse to fail, to quit or stay out of school. You need to lay it on the line with her. That she is still a kid and she needs to develop job skills and education that will take her through life FOR THE SAKE of her baby. That she is not June Cleaver, with a working husband and the money to sit home and be a mommy.
Children in quality day care can do perfectly fine. It is a fact of life for most kids today. My daughter was raised in an orphanage her first two years, certainly far less ideal than a baby here having a sitter or qualified caregiver a few hours a day. She is doing great, a first grader reading at the same level as the privilaged kids in her class who had nannies and SAHMs, and two Lincoln SUVs (or even a Hummer) in the driveway. And she is sweet and polite. Yes, I would have loved to have been home with her, and raised her from birth myself, with no one else coming and going from her life. But she was not born into an ideal situation, which I cannot change. We do the best we can with the situation we have. Your daughter needs to worry about getting a lifetime job skill, and give up a bit of control on caregiving.
Granny, your daughter needs to get it through her head that FEW parents in todays economy can afford the luxury of being a SAHM. It's lovely if one can. However, those who can do this have generally saved, planned, and waited to start their families until they and their spouse are financially capable of giving up one income or education. Your daughter is not in that situation. (I wasn't either- adopting internationally takes a few bucks and strains the savings). She is a single HS KID who still needs a lot more school to be able to provide for this child, and herself over the long run. If biodad dropped dead in three years, or became permanantly disabled, how would she care for this child? She can't always plan on you being able to do this.
You need to stop giving her an excuse to fail, to quit or stay out of school. You need to lay it on the line with her. That she is still a kid and she needs to develop job skills and education that will take her through life FOR THE SAKE of her baby. That she is not June Cleaver, with a working husband and the money to sit home and be a mommy.
Children in quality day care can do perfectly fine. It is a fact of life for most kids today. My daughter was raised in an orphanage her first two years, certainly far less ideal than a baby here having a sitter or qualified caregiver a few hours a day. She is doing great, a first grader reading at the same level as the privilaged kids in her class who had nannies and SAHMs, and two Lincoln SUVs (or even a Hummer) in the driveway. And she is sweet and polite. Yes, I would have loved to have been home with her, and raised her from birth myself, with no one else coming and going from her life. But she was not born into an ideal situation, which I cannot change. We do the best we can with the situation we have. Your daughter needs to worry about getting a lifetime job skill, and give up a bit of control on caregiving.
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