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  1. #1
    notsure2010 is offline Junior Member
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    Unhappy unwed mother custody question in Arkansas

    What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Arkansas

    Okay...Heres the issue...I am 18 and my child will be 2 weeks old on wednesday. The father of the baby is 20 and he is on the birth certificate. We both still live with our parents and the original arrangement was that the baby would live with me and my parents and we even set a room up in the house for the father to stay if he wanted to stay the night with the baby. Well now him and his mother are trying to take the baby from me at night and are angry because i refuse to leave her. What kind of mother leaves her 2 week old baby? I just would not feel right leaving her. I havent left her during the day even much less at night. And besides that, I am breastfeeding and cannot pump enough for her to stay a whole night with out me. The mother has even went as far as stealing the breastmilk that i have already pumped and taking it to her house. So i guess my main question here is what are the custody laws for an unwed mother in arkansas when the father is on the birth certificate?
  2. #2
    Zigner is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by notsure2010 View Post
    What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Arkansas

    Okay...Heres the issue...I am 18 and my child will be 2 weeks old on wednesday. The father of the baby is 20 and he is on the birth certificate. We both still live with our parents and the original arrangement was that the baby would live with me and my parents and we even set a room up in the house for the father to stay if he wanted to stay the night with the baby. Well now him and his mother are trying to take the baby from me at night and are angry because i refuse to leave her. What kind of mother leaves her 2 week old baby? I just would not feel right leaving her. I havent left her during the day even much less at night. And besides that, I am breastfeeding and cannot pump enough for her to stay a whole night with out me. The mother has even went as far as stealing the breastmilk that i have already pumped and taking it to her house. So i guess my main question here is what are the custody laws for an unwed mother in arkansas when the father is on the birth certificate?
    If the father of the child or the paternal grandmother of the child won't leave your house when asked, call the police. When either of them steals something from you, call the police.

    Also, get to court to establish custody, visitation & child support. Google the courts for your county, I'm sure there's self-help information...
  3. #3
    LdiJ is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by notsure2010 View Post
    What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Arkansas

    Okay...Heres the issue...I am 18 and my child will be 2 weeks old on wednesday. The father of the baby is 20 and he is on the birth certificate. We both still live with our parents and the original arrangement was that the baby would live with me and my parents and we even set a room up in the house for the father to stay if he wanted to stay the night with the baby. Well now him and his mother are trying to take the baby from me at night and are angry because i refuse to leave her. What kind of mother leaves her 2 week old baby? I just would not feel right leaving her. I havent left her during the day even much less at night. And besides that, I am breastfeeding and cannot pump enough for her to stay a whole night with out me. The mother has even went as far as stealing the breastmilk that i have already pumped and taking it to her house. So i guess my main question here is what are the custody laws for an unwed mother in arkansas when the father is on the birth certificate?
    The father father has no enforceable rights until he takes it to court to get enforceable visitation rights.

    His mother has no inherent rights at all.

    However, eventually dad WILL get overnights in his home, and it will probably be sooner than you will be comfortable with.
  4. #4
    nextwife is offline Senior Member
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    If dad establishes paternity and files for a shared parenting plan, he likely will get some overnights with his child in his home.

    And yes, good competent mothers can and do leave the baby in the care of others at times. Such as with their fathers, rather than spend 24/7 with the baby. Grandparents (paternal or maternal) can watch a very young child as well without it creating harm to the child. My mom would leave me and younger sibs with her mom for a night out with our dad even when they were VERY young. And we were also left in the care of our father. There is nothing unmotherly about having a competent adult family member providing caregiving while you take some time away from baby, leaving pumped breastmilk for kiddo.

    You are only 18. What are you doing about HS or job training? Surely you don't plan to continue staying home long term - aren't you getting back to work or school in a month or so, so you will have the ability to earn a sustainable income of your own, to support you and your baby? You and dad can work our a shared schedule that will enable you to keep going forward with school or work, at least part time for now.
    Last edited by nextwife; 04-05-2010 at 12:50 PM.

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