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Violating a visitation court order

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Incheck

Junior Member
My son and his wife divorced and have two children. As a result, each of them kept custody of one child. One child who is 10 lives in the state of WA and the other 15 lives in NY.

Court papers specifically stated every other year who does the traveling and also which holidays along with summer vacation. Summer vacation is one month at each others.

This past year, the 10 yr old was supposed to spend the holidays in NY. Apparently the parent decided to leave it up to the child to decide and prefaced it by saying that there were many gifts awaiting her at someone's home in VA. And of course, the child was eager to go there instead of spending time with the other parent.

Do you think the WA parent violated the order? If so, what should we do?

The 15 yr feels pressured by the WA parent. The WA parent had said something to the effect that the NY parent is trying to pay back for what she did during the holidays. She is very good at manipulating and drawing guilt. Why do divorced parents continue to 'use' their children, don't they know that the children are already mentally stressed by the divorce.

My question is: Could we force a 15 yr to go see the parent if he does not want to? He is a teenager, is he obligated? Or could the parent go back to court to have the visitations modified, making it just the summer vacation? What happens if the teen wants to work for the summer?
 


BL

Senior Member
As long as there is Court Orders , Parents must send the children for visitation , or face contempt of court order .

Of Course either Parent could file for a modification , whether it would be granted , or not , would be up to the Judge , not the children, or Parents .
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
Quite frankly, if you allow the 15 year old to "choose" then you are just as much in the wrong as mom was for allowing the 10 year old to choose. You also would weaken your case for contempt.
 

Incheck

Junior Member
We are not asking the 15 yr to choose. We are abiding by the court order.

He is a teenager and has voiced his opinion. We have to take that into consideration. We want to send him and he wants to but not as often. He wants to visit in the summer as opposed the going during every school break.

If he is forced to go then that also becomes another added problem.
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
If there is a court order, he has to go. Or the parent he lives with is in contempt of the order. Just as the other parent is in contempt of the order wrt the 10yo. This isn't complicated, OP. Neither child is permitted to choose nor is either parent permitted to go against the order. But it is up to the parent who didn't get their ordered time to file in court.
 

Nonya

Junior Member
in the state of WI at the age of 13 (I believe)or older the child has a say in weather or not he wants to have visitation with the other parent. I know that when I was 6yrs old I was able to make the choice but that was in the 80s.
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
Nonya said:
in the state of WI at the age of 13 (I believe)or older the child has a say in weather or not he wants to have visitation with the other parent. I know that when I was 6yrs old I was able to make the choice but that was in the 80s.
No. Children are not allowed to choose.

And I have never heard of anyone - child or not - having a say in the weather. It's gonna snow, rain or be sunny regardless of what someone says.
 

HomeGuru

Senior Member
stealth2 said:
No. Children are not allowed to choose.

And I have never heard of anyone - child or not - having a say in the weather. It's gonna snow, rain or be sunny regardless of what someone says.

**A: maybe the child is a rain god prodigy?
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
HomeGuru said:
**A: maybe the child is a rain god prodigy?
Well, all I know is my kids have done the frikkin' snow dance God knows how many times we ain't got none. :mad:
 

Just Blue

Senior Member
stealth2 said:
Well, all I know is my kids have done the frikkin' snow dance God knows how many times we ain't got none. :mad:

It worked...but for us...We're getting a N'Easter tomorrow...so tell you kids thanks...We needed another 14 inches of snow...:(
 

Nonya

Junior Member
excuse the typo but all i was saying is that i had a say in the matter when i was younger. And excuse me if I'm wrong but if a child can go to court as an adult at the age of 12 then I believe that there would be something wrong if the same child has no say if he wants to see the other parent.
 

Just Blue

Senior Member
Nonya said:
excuse the typo but all i was saying is that i had a say in the matter when i was younger. And excuse me if I'm wrong but if a child can go to court as an adult at the age of 12 then I believe that there would be something wrong if the same child has no say if he wants to see the other parent.

You're excused..;)
 

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