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Visitation Agreement-Can I do this on my own?

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LisaLisa

Junior Member
What is the name of your state? Kentucky

Custody has not been established in the court, but child support has. The child has been living with me since birth, the child is 7 years old. The child has never seen the NCP. I want to start visitation, but I want to stay away from the courts as mush as possible, until futher notice. The NCP lives in Kentucky but lives in another county. The NCP lives with his girlfriend and their child. I don't know how the courts will handle overnight visitation or joint custody due to this situation. When we were dating he had a two bedroom apartment, and when his oldest son came for an overnight visit, the child slept on the couch, he did not have a bed for the child or his own room. That room was made into his office. Any way, here is a rough draft of the Visitation Agreement that I put together. I want to go about this in a positive, mature way, with the best interest of the child.

Visitation Schedule Agreement

Alternate weekends - for the NCP starting the 1st and 3rd weekend of each month. Visitation is to start out slowly gradually increasing visitation after the first 6 months. Visitation will take place at the NCP mother’s (grandmother) house here in Lexington, Kentucky, from 2pm-4pm on the 1st and 3rd weekend for the first 6 months. The NCP will keep the child in the Lexington, Kentucky area during the first 6 months of visitation. After the first 6 months visitation will increase to half days on the 1st and 3rd weekend of each month (Saturday 2pm-7pm, Sunday 2pm-7pm). At the end of the half day visitation the NCP will drop the child off at the child’s residence. After the first year the NCP will have overnight weekend visitation, on the 1st and 3rd weekend, starting Saturday at 8am ending on Sunday at 7pm. The NCP will provide a non-cohabiting safe, healthy environment for the child, with the child’s own room, with a bed, dresser drawers/and or closets. The NCP will be responsible in transporting the child to and from her weekend activities and obligations. The NCP will have 2 weeks of summer visitation (the weeks will be mutual discuss and agreed by both parents two months before the child’s summer vacation begins). The NCP will provide a non-cohabiting, safe, healthy environment for the child, with the child’s own room, with a bed, dresser drawers/and or closets. The NCP will be responsible in transporting the child to and from her camp (s) or any other summer activities or obligation during the NCP 2 weeks summer visitation.

Transportation

The child will be dropped off at the NCP mother’s (grandmother’s) house, by the CP and pick up by the CP for the first 6 months of visitation. During the half days and overnight visitations the NCP will pick the child up at her residence and drop her off at her residence at the end of the half days or overnight visitation. If either the CP or NCP is going to be late, a phone call will be made by that parent to the other parent. Either parent may designate a relative or a trusted responsible friend who is a licensed driver, that the child knows and is comfortable with to transport the child in case the parent is unable (due to work, injury, illness family emergencies or any other obligations) to drop the child off or pick the child up for visitation, or unable to drop the child off or pick the child up from weekend activities.

Holidays


Birthdays, Christmas, New Years Day, Easter, Memorial Day, Labor Day, Thanksgiving, will be shared between the CP and NCP. Each parent will get 5 hours, the first 5 hours will be at 8am - 1pm and the second hours will be at 2pm-7pm. If the Holiday fall on the half days or overnight visitation, the CP will have the 8am -1pm shared Holiday time with the child.

Parents Day​

The NCP will have visitation with the child on Father’s day and his birthday starting 10:00am - 7pm visitation with the child.





Siblings​

The child can have visitation with her brothers on their Birthday or any time during the NCP visitation.


Telephone Calls​

Open telephone contact by the child to the parent and by the parent to the child will occur during reasonable hours. Any day during the week from 5:30pm - 8:00pm, and Weekends from 8am - 9pm. Open telephone contact by the child to the parent and by the parent to the child will occur during the NCP visitations, during reasonable hours.

Contact Information​

Both parents will keep each other informed of current residence and home telephone number and cell phone number, and email address. Both parents have (5) days to inform the other parent of new residence and telephone and cell number and email address.


Rearrangements​

If either the CP or NCP need to make rearrange visitation due to work, illness, injury, family emergencies or obligations (parent or child may have), they may do so upon an mutual agreement in writing or (email).


Special Provisions​

At no time shall the NCP leave the child alone unsupervised with stranger or unfamiliar people that the child doesn’t know or fell comfortable being around, without the NCP present. If at anytime during the NCP visitation the NCP cannot keep the child due to work, illness, injury, family emergency or obligation. The NCP will call the CP to make arrangements to pick the child up.

Good Relations​

Both parents will make an effort to Facilitate a healthy, strong, and positive parent to parent relationship. Both parents will make an effort to Facilitate a healthy, strong, and positive relationship between the parent and the child. Neither parent shall speak negatively or ill towards the other parent or about the other parent in the presence of the child or in the presence where the child can hear. The parent will remove the child from any environment where other people are talking negatively about the other parent. Neither parent will use the child or a third party to relay messages to the other parent or question the child in an effort to find things out about the other parent.





Dispute Resolution​

Both parents should attempt to resolve any matters on visitation schedule which they disagree through mutual discussion. If that fails the parents shall attempt to resolve any matters on which they disagree or which involve interpreting the visitation schedule through Mediation by a third-party, a professional Mediator in the Fayette County District Court.


Adjusting the Agreement​

The Visitation Schedule Agreement can be reviewed over a periodic basis and can be changed with the consent of both parents.
 


Whyte Noise

Senior Member
First off, you do realize that this isn't legal and binding unless it does go through the court, right?

My comments will be in bold type.

LisaLisa said:
What is the name of your state? Kentucky

Custody has not been established in the court, but child support has. The child has been living with me since birth, the child is 7 years old. The child has never seen the NCP. I want to start visitation, but I want to stay away from the courts as mush as possible, until futher notice. The NCP lives in Kentucky but lives in another county. The NCP lives with his girlfriend and their child. I don't know how the courts will handle overnight visitation or joint custody due to this situation. When we were dating he had a two bedroom apartment, and when his oldest son came for an overnight visit, the child slept on the couch, he did not have a bed for the child or his own room. That room was made into his office. Any way, here is a rough draft of the Visitation Agreement that I put together. I want to go about this in a positive, mature way, with the best interest of the child.

Visitation Schedule Agreement

Alternate weekends - for the NCP starting the 1st and 3rd weekend of each month. Visitation is to start out slowly gradually increasing visitation after the first 6 months. Visitation will take place at the NCP mother’s (grandmother) house here in Lexington, Kentucky, from 2pm-4pm on the 1st and 3rd weekend for the first 6 months. The NCP will keep the child in the Lexington, Kentucky area during the first 6 months of visitation. After the first 6 months visitation will increase to half days on the 1st and 3rd weekend of each month (Saturday 2pm-7pm, Sunday 2pm-7pm). At the end of the half day visitation the NCP will drop the child off at the child’s residence. After the first year the NCP will have overnight weekend visitation, on the 1st and 3rd weekend, starting Saturday at 8am ending on Sunday at 7pm. The NCP will provide a non-cohabiting safe, healthy environment for the child, with the child’s own room, with a bed, dresser drawers/and or closets. The NCP will be responsible in transporting the child to and from her weekend activities and obligations. The NCP will have 2 weeks of summer visitation (the weeks will be mutual discuss and agreed by both parents two months before the child’s summer vacation begins). The NCP will provide a non-cohabiting, safe, healthy environment for the child, with the child’s own room, with a bed, dresser drawers/and or closets. The NCP will be responsible in transporting the child to and from her camp (s) or any other summer activities or obligation during the NCP 2 weeks summer visitation. 6 months of 2 hour visitations? And these visitations are on both Saturday and Sunday, so he has to drive to the grandmothers house on both days, making 2 round trips unless he stays the weekends with his mom? I'd drop the 6 months down to 3 for both the 2 hour visits and the half day visits. The way you have the 2 weeks summer visits worded he can start that this summer, which isn't even after your 6 month 2 hour visit proposal. The non-cohabitating part... do you also provde that? Remember, any restrictions you want to place on him, he can also place on you. How do you know he doesn't have a bedroom for her already? Also, just as an FYI, weekend overnight visitations are normally from 6 PM Friday to 6 PM Sunday. Two complete overnights, not just one

Transportation

The child will be dropped off at the NCP mother’s (grandmother’s) house, by the CP and pick up by the CP for the first 6 months of visitation. During the half days and overnight visitations the NCP will pick the child up at her residence and drop her off at her residence at the end of the half days or overnight visitation. If either the CP or NCP is going to be late, a phone call will be made by that parent to the other parent. Either parent may designate a relative or a trusted responsible friend who is a licensed driver, that the child knows and is comfortable with to transport the child in case the parent is unable (due to work, injury, illness family emergencies or any other obligations) to drop the child off or pick the child up for visitation, or unable to drop the child off or pick the child up from weekend activities. This part sounds OK.

Holidays


Birthdays, Christmas, New Years Day, Easter, Memorial Day, Labor Day, Thanksgiving, will be shared between the CP and NCP. Each parent will get 5 hours, the first 5 hours will be at 8am - 1pm and the second hours will be at 2pm-7pm. If the Holiday fall on the half days or overnight visitation, the CP will have the 8am -1pm shared Holiday time with the child. Which parent gets which half? Also 8 to 1 then 2 to 7... where is the child between 1 and 2? should be 8 to 1 then 1 to 6. When one is done, the other's time starts.

Parents Day​

The NCP will have visitation with the child on Father’s day and his birthday starting 10:00am - 7pm visitation with the child. OK





Siblings​

The child can have visitation with her brothers on their Birthday or any time during the NCP visitation. Uhmmm... no. "Any time during the NCP visitation"?? That's the NCP's time for him to do with as he likes. Taking time away from him for brothers visitation when she lives with brothers (I'm assuming) isn't a very good idea.


Telephone Calls​

Open telephone contact by the child to the parent and by the parent to the child will occur during reasonable hours. Any day during the week from 5:30pm - 8:00pm, and Weekends from 8am - 9pm. Open telephone contact by the child to the parent and by the parent to the child will occur during the NCP visitations, during reasonable hours. Change the "during reasonable hours" to between 5:30 and 8:00. Just the same as you have for him to call her at your house.

Contact Information​

Both parents will keep each other informed of current residence and home telephone number and cell phone number, and email address. Both parents have (5) days to inform the other parent of new residence and telephone and cell number and email address. OK


Rearrangements​

If either the CP or NCP need to make rearrange visitation due to work, illness, injury, family emergencies or obligations (parent or child may have), they may do so upon an mutual agreement in writing or (email). OK


Special Provisions​

At no time shall the NCP leave the child alone unsupervised with stranger or unfamiliar people that the child doesn’t know or fell comfortable being around, without the NCP present. If at anytime during the NCP visitation the NCP cannot keep the child due to work, illness, injury, family emergency or obligation. The NCP will call the CP to make arrangements to pick the child up. Are you also willing to abide by this? Anytime that YOU can't keep the child due to work, illness, injury, family emergency etc. are you willing to allow HIM to have her? This is called Right of First Refusal, and it applies to both parties. Don't place restrictions on him that you wouldn't abide by as well.

Good Relations​

Both parents will make an effort to Facilitate a healthy, strong, and positive parent to parent relationship. Both parents will make an effort to Facilitate a healthy, strong, and positive relationship between the parent and the child. Neither parent shall speak negatively or ill towards the other parent or about the other parent in the presence of the child or in the presence where the child can hear. The parent will remove the child from any environment where other people are talking negatively about the other parent. Neither parent will use the child or a third party to relay messages to the other parent or question the child in an effort to find things out about the other parent. OK





Dispute Resolution​

Both parents should attempt to resolve any matters on visitation schedule which they disagree through mutual discussion. If that fails the parents shall attempt to resolve any matters on which they disagree or which involve interpreting the visitation schedule through Mediation by a third-party, a professional Mediator in the Fayette County District Court. I don't know if a court mediator will mediate a non-court ordered arrangement.


Adjusting the Agreement​

The Visitation Schedule Agreement can be reviewed over a periodic basis and can be changed with the consent of both parents.
 
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