visits

[mommy_of_2]

I am not asking if I should allow it. I am asking what I can do legally from texas! Now do you follow that???

[Proserpina]

Originally Posted by mommy_of_2

I am not asking if I should allow it. I am asking what I can do legally from texas! Now do you follow that???

This is what you wrote:

will not give them up
i am the one that has taken care of them not him. I want him to see them I do not want to take them away from him. I know he would take them just because that is what his family wants and not let me see them. I am trying to prevent this. he hasnt tried at all to see them. I offered this. I just want to know what I can do legally to make sure I get them back. I will not give up my kids.

As has been said more than once, Dad has EQUAL rights to the children - they are not yours, they are not his.

So, if you wish to have some kind of legal authority which will allow you to determine where the children are at a given time (or as close as is realistic), you need to file for divorce, and file for temporary custody at the same time which will remain until the divorce is finalized and the final custodial orders are in place.

Now do you follow that?

[Hisbabygirl77]

Originally Posted by Dogmatique

This is what you wrote:



As has been said more than once, Dad has EQUAL rights to the children - they are not yours, they are not his.

So, if you wish to have some kind of legal authority which will allow you to determine where the children are at a given time (or as close as is realistic), you need to file for divorce, and file for temporary custody at the same time which will remain until the divorce is finalized and the final custodial orders are in place.

Now do you follow that?

Now if only the OP could follow her OWN posts that would be dandy.

[Proserpina]

Originally Posted by Hisbabygirl77

Now if only the OP could follow her OWN posts that would be dandy.

Yer lucky I like ya...you are now the cause of my brain being forced to sing very old Adam Ant songs ....



OP, c'mon. Many of us have been in your position, and worse. We're not telling you these things to get a rise out of you, or to put you on the defensive. Please, understand the reality of your situation and help us help you.

[Hisbabygirl77]

Originally Posted by Dogmatique

Yer lucky I like ya...you are now the cause of my brain being forced to sing very old Adam Ant songs ....



OP, c'mon. Many of us have been in your position, and worse. We're not telling you these things to get a rise out of you, or to put you on the defensive. Please, understand the reality of your situation and help us help you.

Well I could always remind you of the song that never ends. Would that help get the other song out of your head? :P you can thank me later when your screaming because you cant stop humming it.

[IsabellaSoriano]

Originally Posted by Hisbabygirl77

Well I could always remind you of the song that never ends. Would that help get the other song out of your head? :P you can thank me later when your screaming because you cant stop humming it.

stop it!!! stop it!!! STOP IT!!!! *runs screaming covering ears!!*

[Proserpina]

Originally Posted by Hisbabygirl77

Well I could always remind you of the song that never ends. Would that help get the other song out of your head? :P you can thank me later when your screaming because you cant stop humming it.

I’m the dandy highwayman who you’re too scared to mention
I spend my cash on looking flash and grabbing your attention...


(that is all)

[LdiJ]

Originally Posted by mommy_of_2

First of all how would you like it if someone took your kids and didnt let you see them at all. that is what he would do. I am trying to prevent this. I am the one and only that has taken care of them. I havent done any of the because I live 8 hours from there and i can't just leave work to go there for that long. i cant file here until after the first of the year thank you! If I could I would have done that already! There is no reason for you to be hateful. I want legal advice not for someon to snotty. I am wanting to know what I can do legally from here in Texas. Read the original post! you will see that.

Ok...I am going to be honest with you.

Until you and the children have lived in TX for a full six months you will not have established residency in TX and you will not be able to file anything in TX.

Therefore, if you allow the children to go to wherever dad is (assuming that is the original home state) dad could file for custody there and receive temporary custody there, pending the outcome of any case. Dad would almost be guaranteed to be granted temporary custody, and would have a better than decent shot at being awarded primary custody.

So, if I were in your shoes, I would not be sending the children to visit dad until I was able to file in TX and be granted temporary custody in TX. That still wouldn't be a guarantee that dad wouldn't try to file something in his state, but it is a guarantee that TX would have jurisdiction and that you could get any case he filed in his state dismissed.

[mommy_of_2]

Originally Posted by LdiJ

Ok...I am going to be honest with you.

Until you and the children have lived in TX for a full six months you will not have established residency in TX and you will not be able to file anything in TX.

Therefore, if you allow the children to go to wherever dad is (assuming that is the original home state) dad could file for custody there and receive temporary custody there, pending the outcome of any case. Dad would almost be guaranteed to be granted temporary custody, and would have a better than decent shot at being awarded primary custody.

So, if I were in your shoes, I would not be sending the children to visit dad until I was able to file in TX and be granted temporary custody in TX. That still wouldn't be a guarantee that dad wouldn't try to file something in his state, but it is a guarantee that TX would have jurisdiction and that you could get any case he filed in his state dismissed.

Thank You so much for your kindness! This is what I was wanting to know!

[Proserpina]

Originally Posted by LdiJ

Ok...I am going to be honest with you.

Until you and the children have lived in TX for a full six months you will not have established residency in TX and you will not be able to file anything in TX.

Therefore, if you allow the children to go to wherever dad is (assuming that is the original home state) dad could file for custody there and receive temporary custody there, pending the outcome of any case. Dad would almost be guaranteed to be granted temporary custody, and would have a better than decent shot at being awarded primary custody.

So, if I were in your shoes, I would not be sending the children to visit dad until I was able to file in TX and be granted temporary custody in TX. That still wouldn't be a guarantee that dad wouldn't try to file something in his state, but it is a guarantee that TX would have jurisdiction and that you could get any case he filed in his state dismissed.

Darn it I can't even find the words to make a half-decent edit.

[LdiJ]

Originally Posted by Dogmatique

Darn it I can't even find the words to make a half-decent edit.

Sorry...I think that people deserve the truth.

Dad could have objected to the move and apparently has chosen not to do so.

[mommy_of_2]

Their father had known that we were moving before we ever left, and has known since exactly where we are at. He has my phone number, and my address. Has even sent my daughter a birthday present to the address. He hasn't done anything. That is why I was saying I offered to take the kids to him. He hasn't made any attempt to see or talk to them at all. I am not trying to keep him from them or I wouldnt have offered it in the first place. We get along and I want to keep it that way. Thank you again!!!!

[sometwo]

Their father had known that we were moving before we ever left, and has known since exactly where we are at. He has my phone number, and my address. Has even sent my daughter a birthday present to the address. He hasn't done anything. That is why I was saying I offered to take the kids to him. He hasn't made any attempt to see or talk to them at all. I am not trying to keep him from them or I wouldnt have offered it in the first place. We get along and I want to keep it that way. Thank you again!!!!

Knowing and agreeing are two totally different things . You stated you didn't want him to take the kids and keep them etc etc but that's just what you did. You took them hours away and you want to make srue they stay in "your" custody just because you think you have more of a right.

Until one of you is ordered custody through the courts he has just as much right as you do. In fact the kids wouldn't even have to be there for him to file he can file right now if he wanted. He could also drive to where the kids are , pick them up , take them back home and then file . Why you might ask? Because they are his children too and he has just as much rights as you.

Until something is filed and done in court neither of you have grounds to "keep" the children from the other parent.

[mdgtfrmhll]

Originally Posted by mommy_of_2

Their father had known that we were moving before we ever left, and has known since exactly where we are at. He has my phone number, and my address. Has even sent my daughter a birthday present to the address. He hasn't done anything. That is why I was saying I offered to take the kids to him. He hasn't made any attempt to see or talk to them at all. I am not trying to keep him from them or I wouldnt have offered it in the first place. We get along and I want to keep it that way. Thank you again!!!!

You say you are worried that dad's family would have him keep the kids, but if dad's family were so gung ho about having the kids, why didn't they have dad file papers the minute you left for divorce and temporary custody and ask to have the children returned? You might be saying you are willing to let dad have the kids for Thanksgiving, so gracious of you by the way, but your actions do not show the same.

If you are so worried about the children not being returned, but at the same time want dad to have access to the kids, why don't you ask for a few days off in a row, and accompany the kids to dads. By your own words you get along, you are still married, so take your kids, sleep on the couch and let dad spend the holiday with the kids.

[mommy_of_2]

I don't get why you say I am trying to keep them from him. If that was the case then I wouldn't be taking them to him. I just know how he was with out children while we were together. He is not a very good father, and has a problem with drinking at times. I do think that is grounds for me to want to make sure that I keep custody of them. Would you want your children around that, no I'm sure you wouldn't. I could just keep them and not let him see them at all because of that very reason. I am not doing that. I do not feel it is a safe place for my children to be 24/7 365 days a year. If people don't understand that I am just trying to make sure they are safe then don't even reply to my post. I do want them to see their father and have a relationship with him. They do need that! I do not think it makes me a bad person to want to keep custody of them, which is what everyone here is trying to make me out to be. I come here for advice and get almost nothing but problems and calling me names. I am just thinking about the safety of my children. The same thing that everyone else here would do also! He suffers from PTSD and I don't think that is something they need to be with on a daily basis! Call me bad, or whatever I don't care. I just want my children safe and I think that makes me a great mother. If I didn't care then I would let them just go and not worry about it. So STOP saying I am keeping them from seeing him. He could have came here to see them if he wanted. I wouldn't have stopped him. I even asked him to come down back in August and he said he was way to busy.