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  1. #1
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    What will happen (CPS, Childrens Crisis Center)

    What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? TX

    Long story short. DD 10 was at home fri night. SM was going to bed and found a letter from DD basically telling everyone she loves them b4 she died and wanted everyone to stop fighting. Very sad. I was at work so SM called Mom. Mom and SM cried on the phone and mom apologized for everything.

    Mom said she noe sees what bring DD into everything has done. and so on. There is no more fighting between everyone everyone is trying to work together to help DD.

    DD was taken to the children s crisis center Mon morning as per our insurance in order to get a referral for a counselor. DD was there for 3+ hours speaking with a counselor. Counselor brought me into another room and asked if I knew about everything going on with mom and ever seeked help for DD. I said yes that DD had been seeing a school counselor for 3 years. She informed me they are not all licensed???

    Anyways, she informed me that everything DD has told her about the situation leads her to believe mom is doing Domestic Emotional Abuse to DD. She said she is on the verge of calling CPS on mom but it would be her supervisors final call.

    She informed that if/when she calls CPS they will come out to my house and interview all my children as well as Moms. She said it is standard. But that mom might be in some serious trouble because of what this has done to DD. She said that if I dont follow her recommendations that CPS would be called on me. No problem I was there to get help for DD.

    1. Mom/Sdad do not beat DD. Isnt that domestic? I understand the emotional abuse part

    2. HEr recommendations were to get DD in counseling and do family therapy with all parents (steps included). We are all on board with this. My question is counselor told me she would be calling me this week to see my progress and if I had not done her recommendations she would report me.
    -soonest I can get DD in as a new patient is This friday at 4PM....its booked. Mom and I are both going. The next appointment was in june. They will not do group until after they have seen DD a few times. So how do I handle that?

    3. What will CPS do with mom? I feel this is to late. Mom is actually on boared and being involved and has acknowledge everything she ever told DD. I understand to late...but I truly believe this was a eye opener for her.
  2. #2
    Ohiogal is offline Senior Member
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    1. Mom/Sdad do not beat DD. Isnt that domestic? I understand the emotional abuse part
    Domestic refers to the fact that all are members of the same household.

    2. HEr recommendations were to get DD in counseling and do family therapy with all parents (steps included). We are all on board with this. My question is counselor told me she would be calling me this week to see my progress and if I had not done her recommendations she would report me.
    -soonest I can get DD in as a new patient is This friday at 4PM....its booked. Mom and I are both going. The next appointment was in june. They will not do group until after they have seen DD a few times. So how do I handle that?
    Is that the ONLY counseling center in town?
    3. What will CPS do with mom? I feel this is to late. Mom is actually on boared and being involved and has acknowledge everything she ever told DD. I understand to late...but I truly believe this was a eye opener for her.
    CPS will investigate the conditions of the children. Then they COULD file in court and get court ordered case plans for BOTH parents to complete based on the issues.
    Parents should remember 3 things: Love your kids more than you hate your ex; when you have children the relationship with the other parent is until death; your children determine what type of nursing home you end up in.
    Nothing stated by me should be taken as giving you legal advice or forming an attorney/client relationship.

    Attorney-GAL in Ohio.

    I've removed the knife from my back, polished it, and will one day return it -- long after you think I have forgotten.
  3. #3
    stealth2 is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by confuseddad2009 View Post
    -soonest I can get DD in as a new patient is This friday at 4PM....its booked. Mom and I are both going. The next appointment was in june. They will not do group until after they have seen DD a few times. So how do I handle that?
    I'm curious if you indicated to the center you were making the appointment at that this was actually an emergent situation. A 10yo threatening suicide is an emergency - they might find a slot for her sooner if you push that aspect of it.

    In the meantime, it may not be bad for you and Mom to look into taking a co-parenting class. Learn how to work together, etc. If nothing else, it will show CPS that you are appropriately concerned about the situation and how y'all got to it to take some sort of action while waiting for family/group counseling to kick in.
  4. #4
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    no it is not the only center. It is where my insurance sent me to get a referrel so I can get her into professional counseling. /She has her first session this friday. They wont do the group until after they have meet with dd (makes sense).

    My concern is mom has had a HUGE eye opener. She call sher about 3 times a day now, visted her in our home, is contacting her teachers, and is really trying. Yes this should have happened years ago. But I dont want cPS to damage what she is trying to do. Basically I am worried because of how the center counselor was speaking. That mom could get supervised visits....that would be dramatic for DD. I think it would make the issues going on with dd alot worse.
  5. #5
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    We were ordered by the court last Wed to take Co parenting classes. So we are already working on getting that taking care of. I called SOOO many places to get DD in to sooner than this friday and either the first available apointment was not until mid may-June or they were not taking new patients. This place had a cancelation with a new patient. ITs a new doc and she takes three new patients a month. Since Fri is the 1st she is taking DD in but not sooner. In the mean time she is talking to her school counselar. Mom and I are working together and showing DD. There is 0 arguing going on. Mom has even said she is going to start bringing her to all her soccer games so that DD can see mom will support her.



    Quote Originally Posted by stealth2 View Post
    I'm curious if you indicated to the center you were making the appointment at that this was actually an emergent situation. A 10yo threatening suicide is an emergency - they might find a slot for her sooner if you push that aspect of it.

    In the meantime, it may not be bad for you and Mom to look into taking a co-parenting class. Learn how to work together, etc. If nothing else, it will show CPS that you are appropriately concerned about the situation and how y'all got to it to take some sort of action while waiting for family/group counseling to kick in.
  6. #6
    stealth2 is offline Senior Member
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    DID you tell them it was an emergency?
  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by stealth2 View Post
    DID you tell them it was an emergency?
    YEs I did. I read the note to them and everything. I told them what the Crisis center had said, ect.
  8. #8
    AkersTile is offline Member
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    Check in your local phone book for a "Mental or Behavioral Health" hotline number. They should have one. If not, you can call your local hospital and they can probably give you numbers to different places. This doesn't sound like something that can wait till Friday. Kiddo may actually even need inpatient services.

    It sounds like everyone is trying to help and do what's best for kiddo. Good luck to all of you!
  9. #9
    CJane is offline Senior Member
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    I'm wondering why a kid threatening suicide wasn't put on a 3-day lock down.
  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by CJane View Post
    I'm wondering why a kid threatening suicide wasn't put on a 3-day lock down.
    The counselor said she does not feel that DD was actually going to kill herself but she left that note for the person she feels really comfortable with knowing it was going to scare everyone. Kinda like a warning. In the begning she said she was evaluating DD to figure out if she needed to be put in the hospital but at the end she said no. She said she NEEDS counseling by a professional and NEEDS family therapy with everyone.
  11. #11
    Isis1 is offline Senior Member
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    this is my absolute unwarranted two cents.

    if CPS feels the need for supervised visitation, then don't stand in their way. this was a long time coming for mom. really. i don't think she needs a hall pass for this one. if she is truely remorseful, then she will accept her responsibility. and work her way back up to parenting again. she could use the time to reflect without all the parenting responsibility. it may have been too much for her to handle the right way.
  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Isis1 View Post
    this is my absolute unwarranted two cents.

    if CPS feels the need for supervised visitation, then don't stand in their way. this was a long time coming for mom. really. i don't think she needs a hall pass for this one. if she is truely remorseful, then she will accept her responsibility. and work her way back up to parenting again. she could use the time to reflect without all the parenting responsibility. it may have been too much for her to handle the right way.
    I understand what you are saying. And god forbid that happens I dont know how DD would take it or what I would say
  13. #13
    TinkerBelleLuvr is offline Senior Member
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    The answer can be as simple as:

    It has been decided amongst the adults and others that it is best that EVERYONE seek treatment so that you can have the best relationship with your mom and dad. If they decide on supervised, then just say that the judge wanted to make sure you were safe and wouldn't be feeling so bad again.

    Children shouldn't want to feel RESPONSIBLE for something that an ADULT did. Tell her that the ADULTS are working it out. Whatever you do, do NOT conveigh the thought that she is at fault for feeling the way she was feeling.
  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by TinkerBelleLuvr View Post
    The answer can be as simple as:

    It has been decided amongst the adults and others that it is best that EVERYONE seek treatment so that you can have the best relationship with your mom and dad. If they decide on supervised, then just say that the judge wanted to make sure you were safe and wouldn't be feeling so bad again.

    Children shouldn't want to feel RESPONSIBLE for something that an ADULT did. Tell her that the ADULTS are working it out. Whatever you do, do NOT conveigh the thought that she is at fault for feeling the way she was feeling.
    That is exactly what I want to avoid. But I do not think it will get that far (I hope)

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