• FreeAdvice has a new Terms of Service and Privacy Policy, effective May 25, 2018.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our Terms of Service and use of cookies.

Working on revisions

Accident - Bankruptcy - Criminal Law / DUI - Business - Consumer - Employment - Family - Immigration - Real Estate - Tax - Traffic - Wills   Please click a topic or scroll down for more.

CJane

Senior Member
What is the name of your state? MO

I'm working on revising my proposed parenting plan for the baby. Remember that his father is only requesting about 10 days a year, and only from 9am to 5pm.

My question is this: His proposal states that each parent is to pick the child up at the other parent's house. I have little issue with this in theory, but I have no idea where he lives or will be living in the future (past habits indicate that he moves a LOT) nor do I really have any idea where I'll be living a year from now since I'm renting and therefore at the whim of a landlord.

SO... is it considered generally acceptable to word things in a fashion similar to this?

Provided the parties reside within 35 miles of each other (this number is rather arbitrary) Father shall pick the child up at the mother's residence at the beginning of his parenting time and mother shall pick the child up at Father's residence at the end of his parenting time. If the parties reside more than 35 miles apart, they shall meet at a mutually agreed upon half-way point.
There are several reasons I'd like to include this, namely that the visitation he's requesting ends one hour prior to the visitation my other children have with their father. If he lives 40 miles from me in the opposite direction from the girls' dad... there's no way I can pick up the baby and still pick up the girls even close to on time.

I guess I need to know if this is reasonable, acceptable and not against public policy (just for BB ;) )
 


Ohiogal

Queen Bee
What you are suggesting is perfectly reasonable and i have seen it in many people's plans. It is better however to use fixed points such as: As long as the parents both live within the following counties.... If either parent moves out of the following counties then the pickup point will be at a halfway point."
Phrasing it that way gives definite boundaries and borders to the area you are talking about. Saying 35 miles leaves it open to interpretation -- is that 35 road miles, crow miles or how else is that defined?
 

CJane

Senior Member
Ohiogal said:
What you are suggesting is perfectly reasonable and i have seen it in many people's plans. It is better however to use fixed points such as: As long as the parents both live within the following counties.... If either parent moves out of the following counties then the pickup point will be at a halfway point."
Phrasing it that way gives definite boundaries and borders to the area you are talking about. Saying 35 miles leaves it open to interpretation -- is that 35 road miles, crow miles or how else is that defined?

I thought about the county thing, but honestly, the counties here are huge and very rural. We could live in the same county and be over an hour away from each other, or in different counties and be only 15 minutes away from each other.

For instance... I can be in county X in 15 minutes. But to get to the other side of that county could take as much as 90 minutes.

Granted, using mileage can be equally problematic because if he lives 35 miles from me on mostly interstate, it's not a big deal, but 35 miles on 2 lane highway or gravel IS an issue.

So, I'm sort of trying to figure out what's the easiest thing to base it all on.

Another question and this is probably for someone very familiar with MO law. Again, this is because of the current living situations for both me and the baby's father, the very limited time he's requesting, and the fact taht I don't want to get sucked into a modification request in the near future.

Is it feasible to include language stating that a move w/in a certain mileage (let's say 100 miles since I know other states use that) will not be considered a change in circumstances, in and of itself, provided proper notice (as outlined in the statutes) is given to NCP? If he's only requesting 10 days a year for a few hours at this point... I don't see how a move of even 200 miles would make it difficult to facilitate visitation. I also don't anticipate moving that far away because of the custody arrangement with the girls, but I am trying to plan for contingencies in order to make this a plan that lasts, rather than one taht needs modified again in a year.
 

acmb05

Senior Member
CJane said:
What is the name of your state? MO

I'm working on revising my proposed parenting plan for the baby. Remember that his father is only requesting about 10 days a year, and only from 9am to 5pm.

My question is this: His proposal states that each parent is to pick the child up at the other parent's house. I have little issue with this in theory, but I have no idea where he lives or will be living in the future (past habits indicate that he moves a LOT) nor do I really have any idea where I'll be living a year from now since I'm renting and therefore at the whim of a landlord.

SO... is it considered generally acceptable to word things in a fashion similar to this?



There are several reasons I'd like to include this, namely that the visitation he's requesting ends one hour prior to the visitation my other children have with their father. If he lives 40 miles from me in the opposite direction from the girls' dad... there's no way I can pick up the baby and still pick up the girls even close to on time.

I guess I need to know if this is reasonable, acceptable and not against public policy (just for BB ;) )
Just a question but would it really be that big of a deal if you are 30 minutes later picking your other children up from thier fathers?
 

CJane

Senior Member
acmb05 said:
Just a question but would it really be that big of a deal if you are 30 minutes later picking your other children up from thier fathers?
Well, yeah. Their father and I just went through a modification. We have specific times for a reason. I can see how occasionally it wouldn't be that big of a deal to be late... it happens to all of us. But this would be EVERY holiday that the kids aren't with me. I think it would be exceedingly rude to be late every time.
 

Silverplum

Senior Member
Yes, it can become a HUGE deal, depending upon the parents involved.

CJane, I think you are wise to poke and prod your/Dad's proposal/s in hopes of making a long-lasting agreement.
 

Find the Right Lawyer for Your Legal Issue!

Fast, Free, and Confidential
data-ad-format="auto">
Top