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  1. #1
    confuseddad9254 is offline Junior Member
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    Unhappy Can Child Support Arrears Be Forgiven?

    I currently live in California, but child support case is filed in South Carolina. For years, I had been paying my child support of $400/mo out of court and directly to the mother. She was supposed to be reporting to the court that I was making my payments. However, upon filing my last tax return, I got a letter in the mail from the IRS saying my tax refund was taken, and placed towards the child support arrears that I owed. As far as I knew, I did not owe any because I had been paying her faithfully for about 10 years. So I then called the court where they told me I owe upwards of 60k in arrears. The mother, has apologized, and agreed to have all arrearages dropped with the agreement that I will continue to pay her the $400/month until my son is 18. My question is, because I believe she was recieving some state assistance, and I think medicare.....is it even possible for all the arrears to be forgiven? I've heard that the state will require to be paid back for that. And my second question is....what does the process of forgiving arrearages entail? Forms/court visits etc? She send me a written agreement in the mail to sign, stating the above...but it was not a formal court document, and I need to make sure the above agreement makes it to the court level, and my debts get cleared up!!!!What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
  2. #2
    Humusluvr is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by confuseddad9254 View Post
    I currently live in California, but child support case is filed in South Carolina. For years, I had been paying my child support of $400/mo out of court and directly to the mother. She was supposed to be reporting to the court that I was making my payments. However, upon filing my last tax return, I got a letter in the mail from the IRS saying my tax refund was taken, and placed towards the child support arrears that I owed. As far as I knew, I did not owe any because I had been paying her faithfully for about 10 years. So I then called the court where they told me I owe upwards of 60k in arrears. The mother, has apologized, and agreed to have all arrearages dropped with the agreement that I will continue to pay her the $400/month until my son is 18. My question is, because I believe she was recieving some state assistance, and I think medicare.....is it even possible for all the arrears to be forgiven? I've heard that the state will require to be paid back for that. And my second question is....what does the process of forgiving arrearages entail? Forms/court visits etc? She send me a written agreement in the mail to sign, stating the above...but it was not a formal court document, and I need to make sure the above agreement makes it to the court level, and my debts get cleared up!!!!What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
    Was she receiving State assistance?

    Was the order through the Child Support Enforcement Agency? Or did you and mom have an agreement that was not "official?" I know you said it was "filed."

    Had you not heard of repaying the State before this? No letters, no requests, or just a $60K bill you knew nothing of?
  3. #3
    confuseddad9254 is offline Junior Member
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    the child support order was filed in with the courts in South Carolina. I had not EVER recieved any notification that I owed her anything. So I assumed, she had been reporting my payments. (I know, stupid of me to just trust her and not check myself) But its been 10 years, so I thought everything was fine. I have however, moved around quite frequently due to my profession....so I'm honestly not sure, If they've ever tried to send me any notices that I have not recieved. It seems like at least 1 or two would have made their way to me somehow.
  4. #4
    confuseddad9254 is offline Junior Member
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    oh and...i'm pretty sure her and my son are both on medicare from the state. but, my child support order, says that my payments are to be for support of the child, and his medical insurance costs.
  5. #5
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    Receipt of medical or food stamps alone, does not create an assignment to the state. The CP must receive some form of cash aid (AFDC/TANF).
    When dealing with this issue, I would suggest that you rephrase question, not as "can arrears be waived", but rather, that you are seeking an accounting and to have all payments made credited against your support obligation.
  6. #6
    confuseddad9254 is offline Junior Member
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    thats what I was not sure of. I called the CSE department, and asked them how I could go about getting credited my appropriate amounts, and they said i would have to give them all the proof of payments I made to her since she has not reported any. And apparently, she has been getting notices from them as to how much I owe. So needless to say I am pissed, that she knew this was happening and did not try to stop it. Probably just to have something to hold over my head. I have proof of payment to her for the last maybe three years max....before that**************.i have to admit I did not keep every copy of what i sent to her. and some months I sent cash or money orders. would she just have to call, and tell them that i have made all my payments and to drop the arrears? or would there still need to be some kind of "forgive" situation from her? Im just trying to find out exactly what needs to be done, so I can call her and tell her exactly what to do. And know that she isn't jerking me around at all.
  7. #7
    confuseddad9254 is offline Junior Member
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    i have a really good relationship with her, or at least i thought i did. She said she is willing to do whatever needs to be done to clear it up. She even told me that she would be willing to drop the child support lien completely, because she trusted me to pay her without it. but i did not want her to do that. Im not sure if she even could do that. I am not by any means trying to get out of paying the support. I just want my payments to reflect up to date account balance so I don't have to worry anymore. like I said, she sent me a letter in the mail that she signed saying I am up to date on my payments, but of course...sending it TO ME, isn't going to clear up the arrears. i am trying to figure out a way to handle this, without having to go to court, because we are on opposite sides of the country. im assuming, that since its supposedly money owed to HER....that there has to be something she can mail to them, or go to her court and do, or have her case worker do....to make things right. Im just trying to find out what that is.
  8. #8
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    I believe you said Mom would admit that she had received all regular payments that have previoulsy matured. If that's the case, then I believe that such a written statement by her, signed under penalty of perjury, should do the trick. In Ca there is a form entitled "Acknowledgment of Satisfaction of Judgment." If there is a similar form from SC, it wouldn't hurt to have your ex fill that out and sign it, as well.

    Also, before much more time elapses, you should started getting your old bank records. Banks usually maintain their records for 7 years, at least in Ca.

    Lastly, if mom won't now admit that she received timely payments, then, you probably do have the burden of proving what was paid. In Ca., there is great difficulty (almost impossibility), of waiving accrued arrears. If the same is true in SC, you don't want to have to go down that road. The laws of SC should govern your case. Good luck.
  9. #9
    wileybunch is offline Senior Member
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    She cannot "forgive" your arrearages if she got state assistance and the state is coming after you for C/S based on her statements you haven't been paying any (which it sounds like she did on purpose so she could double dip -- IOW it's welfare fraud via blaming it on you).

    When you called CSE, did you tell them that she doesn't deny t hat you're not really in arrears and get their advice on what she needs to do to call the state off you?
  10. #10
    samuelm is offline Junior Member
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    The only way arrears can be forgiven is if it is money owed to the state and not to the CP. And actually they will not forgive the whole amount, just a good portion of it, like 90%. Here is a link and I picked up a 10 page form from my local CS office and will be turning it in soon since I qualify. Hopefully you do too.

    [url]http://www.childsup.cahwnet.gov/Payments/CompromiseofArrearsProgram/tabid/131/Default.aspx[/url]
    Last edited by samuelm; 12-19-2008 at 01:38 PM.
  11. #11
    mommyof4 is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by samuelm View Post
    The only way arrears can be forgiven is if it is money owed to the state and not to the CP. And actually they will not forgive the whole amount, just a good portion of it, like 90%. Here is a link and I picked up a 10 page form from my local CS office and will be turning it in soon since I qualify. Hopefully you do too.

    [url=http://www.childsup.cahwnet.gov/Payments/CompromiseofArrearsProgram/tabid/131/Default.aspx]Compromise of Arrears Program[/url]
    Actually, it is the exact opposite.
  12. #12
    samuelm is offline Junior Member
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    My local office in Los Angeles told me that so long as it is only money owed to the state, and it is over $5000 and I cannot possibly pay it back in 3 years, then I have a good chance at qualifying for this program. If I owe arrears to the CP, then they say it has to be an agreement between us. But yes, for arrears accumulated from state assistance, it can be compromised.
  13. #13
    mommyof4 is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by samuelm View Post
    My local office in Los Angeles told me that so long as it is only money owed to the state, and it is over $5000 and I cannot possibly pay it back in 3 years, then I have a good chance at qualifying for this program. If I owe arrears to the CP, then they say it has to be an agreement between us. But yes, for arrears accumulated from state assistance, it can be compromised.

    That is NOT forgiving the arrears. That is the state offering a payment plan on an amount they will accept in lieu of the full amount....just like a payment plan reached between a debtor and a credit card company.

    Further, did you check to see what that will do to one's CREDIT?
  14. #14
    Silverplum is offline Senior Member
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    It's all moot, Samuel: the OP's CS case is in South Carolina, not California.
  15. #15
    TinkerBelleLuvr is offline Senior Member
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    listen sammy, the difference is if mom is receiving cash assistance versus just medicaid.

    OP - if mom was just on medicaid, and will testify having received the payments, they can credit the account for payments received.

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